Kon Kent - Blog Posts

Tim, at Starbucks: Can I get a venti mocha latte with, uhh, seven extra espresso shots.

Tim: Oh, and one of those caffeine sachets if you have them.

Kon: Jesus Christ just do cocaine.

Superboy AU where the suit is actually a part of Kon. (TW/CW for brief mention of self harm near the end, marked with three ***)

He doesn’t notice it when he’s still in CADMUS, where he’s in a state that’s not really conscious but too alert to labeled asleep- a dissociative in between. He hears the scientists talking, hears the mention of “the suit responds as expected” or “how does he react to this…”

He can’t focus on it when after weeks of experiments and tests and “Look here, Project 13” he’s being rescued (what was there to be rescued from, what’s going on-)

But when things calm down, and he’s brought to the Watchtower’s medbay and someone goes to remove the suit so they can perform a checkup, he flinches away because that hurt*.

All too suddenly he’s aware of being able to feel the suit. It doesn’t feel like a coat, doesn’t feel like a blanket, it feels like him.

He becomes aware of how it aches, how he can feel the AC on him even though he should be covered.

A quick examination just confirms it: his suit is like a second skin.

It’s full of nerves, veins, even a few thin layers of muscle. There’s no bone, but it’s too soft and flexible to be cartilage. It seems weaker than the rest of him, somehow, old bruises able to be seen if you’re looking for them.

***When he’s left alone for the night, legs still strapped to the medical bed because (he’s dangerous and untrustworthy and was made by Luthor) he thrashed around in a panic earlier, he finds a scalpel left on a try at his bedside and runs it across his chest (hard, because even though he’s not Superman he’s damn well close).

He doesn’t know if he cries when blood rises and trails after the scalpel.

He doesn’t know how he feels when weeks later, there’s still a faint scar.

*I’m not 100% sure how it works in the comics, but to me just because you’re near indestructible/invulnerable, that doesn’t mean you can’t feel pain. I’m sure there’d be a higher tolerance to it, but considering Kon would only be a few weeks old/out of the tube at this point, he hasn’t built up that resistance yet.

Also I am well aware that a scalpel would not work on Kon, let alone Clark, but maybe it’s a kryptonite infused scalpel for emergencies.

Bart has been banned from every casino in Vegas due to his card counting abilities. It’s not like he even has to try to do it, it just happens. One of those things he off handedly notices when looking at everything around him. He doesn’t go out of his way to look at other peoples cards with his superspeed, he doesn’t actually believe in cheating, but it’s not like he can turn off his observational skills.

That being said, Kon trying to invite his buddy out for a wild night on the town is really difficult to do because he doesn’t know where Bart’s been banned from.

Kon: Pack your bags, we’re going to Vegas!

Bart: Ooo Vegas! …What’s in Vegas?

Kon: What isn’t in Vegas, Imp? There’s great sights, hot girls, delicious foods, fun casinos!

Bart, sighing dramatically: I can’t go into those.

Kon: what do you mean?

Bart: Apparently I’m on a ‘on sight’ list. All gambling districts know my face and kick me out the moment I step on the property.

Kon: … what??

Bart: I know right! I wasn’t even doing it on purpose! It’s not like I was actually in it to steal their money. I was under cover, helping Tim out on recon.

Kon: … right. So then, no Casino’s for you then. Strip club?

Bart: You know I don’t enjoy those. And I’m taken. The last time you took me to one I was mistaken for a dancer and dragged into the changing rooms.

Kon: You look great in fishnet.

Bart: Thank you.

Kon: okay, how about… a bar?

Bart: Neither of us can get drunk.

Kon: Ugh

Bart: What about that techno club? Dancing is easy, and fun.

Kon: Sensitive ears.

Bart: Ah. Nevermind then. I have some contacts in the music industry, I can get us in a concert Hall with backstage passes if there’s any good live shows going on.

Kon: Why do you have contacts in the music industry?

Bart: I was in a two person band in highschool and got scouted by this one dude. Long story.

Kon: The more I learn about your highschool days the more in awe I get.

Bart: ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

Bart was canonically trapped in a video game for over half of his life, and he has a reaction time faster than the speed of light. There ain’t no way these people are beating him.

for science

You can’t spell Ken without Kent and you can’t spell Barbie without Bart. So, in this ted talk-

Bart: This is totally absurd!

Tim: No, it’s really not.

Kon: This is for your safety.

Bart: Oh, What, next you’re going to tell me that skateboarding on top of titans tower on a ramp I made myself is “Dangerous”. Psh…

Kon and Tim simultaneously: YES.

Have you considered JayBartTimKon polycule?

Bart being loved by everyone

I would like to see it

OMA Okay, so, YES! I have! I’m a fruitful believer in TimKonBart, but after building the foundation of JayBart, it’s been on my mind non-stop.  Starring: Kon being the hotheaded-himbo™, Tim as the Idiot with brains, Jay as the Classy Motherfucker, and Bart as the glue that they literally all depend on and will fight(kill in one case) anyone for.  Bart is totally oblivious to his role. 

How their polycule works in my mind are like so 💕 (Side note: a Polycule is a network of people connected in a large scale relationship, but not all persons are connected the same way for those that don’t know)

All three Jason, Kon, and Tim have a current romantic relationship with Bart. Kon and Tim are primary partners to each other, with Bart occasionally joining their group. Jason and Kon are more distant; their standpoints vary on each other depending on mood and day. Tim and Jay are brothers, adoptive or not, so there's no relationship other than platonic; I don’t ship any batcest. 

Some common occurrences with these roles:

Bart, casually suggesting to Tim and Jay, on separate occasions, that they should work things out and the story is a lot deeper than it may seem. Jay gets pouty about it for a week, and Tim puts it off until he can’t stop thinking about what Bart said until surprisingly, Jay calls him first. The moral of the story, they all take Barts's opinion of them VERY. SERIOUSLY. When it happened after a week, he figured he had nothing to do with it since it was muuuch longer to his perception of time. 

Kon and Tim get into another argument because Kon’s being stubborn™, and Tim is also stubborn. So as Bart does, he becomes stubborn about people getting along. He approaches Tim first, giving Kon time to cool off and him an opportunity to catch Tim off guard while he’s sleep-deprived. He talks in his usual upbeat way, asking questions on top of questions faster than Tim can answer so Tim tries answering everything, not even able to process their questions about the argument that just occurred. After he’s satisfied he goes to Kon, knocking on his door politely (something he didn’t do with Tim) and when he’s invited in, he lays out Tim’s side of the story in a much more emotionally heartfelt way that Tim usually isn’t able to put into words. He then leaves and lets them apologize to each other. 

The first time Bart dies, and then closely after with Kon’s death, with Tim going through his phase into Red Robin, Jay actually COMFORTS him. For the first time. When Bart did come back, he saw that they got much closer and Jay’s excuse was “You fucking DIED. Never do that again.” and they cry. (Too Bad Bart dies four more times after that)... 

I have sooo many ideas on this but I hope you’re satisfied! ❤😊

Kon and Bart: *eating insane amounts of Pie*

Kon: Tim, you gotta order a piece of this pie.

Tim: I did. You guys immediately ate it.

Kon: What would make you possibly believe I have any idea that I knew where this "wolf" is?

Tim: Oh, well first off, somebody called in an anonymous report that some masked teen was flying through Metropolis with a moving tarp. Secondly, I'm dating you and I know when you're lying and third, there's around 300 packets of tarter sauce on the doorstep.

Kon: You're right... I'll start watching my cholesterol.

Tim: Kon.

Kon: Bart was here?

Tim, walking to a walk in closet and opening it so the wolf tumbles out: Kon.

Kon: ... Whaaaat? Bart must've... hid that... there. Without me knowing... Crazzzy.

DC Groupchats as some of my favourite Homestuck quotes pt. 1

Jason: Hey, I wanna tell a joke.

Tim: ?!?

Dick: Ok?

Jason: What did the kitty cat say to the clown?

Dick: what?

Jason: I'M GOING TO DEVOUR YOUR INTERNAL ORGANS, YOU MURDEROUS SON OF A BITCH.

-Damian has left the chat-

__________________________________________

Bart: Holy Shrap

Kon: yeah

Tim: What?

Bart: so uh I need to borrow apples

Greta: Okay *opens her suit coat and infinite apples pour out*

Cassie: Oh my gods.

Greta: How many do you need?

Bart: 4

Greta: I have them all

Greta: I own all apples

Greta: take as many as you wish

Bart: Incredible

Greta: Isn't it just

Bart: *inhales the apples* fantastic

-Tim has disconnected-

-Kon has disconnected-

____________________________________________

Jay: roy, help

Jay: i broke my fucking caps key

Roy: Whats wrong dude?

Roy: oh

Roy: ha

Roy: youre so calm

Jay: shut the hell up and help me you god damned fruit cup

Roy: hahaha

Roy: its so weird

Roy: youre trying to yell at me

Jay: stop the ass hole antics and help me

Roy: Its like being yelled at by a librarian

____________________________________________

Wally: i mean what are regular towels even made of?

Dick: cotton

Wally: oh shit really, I thought it was wool..

Wally: okay new idea

Dick: Im sure both exist

Wally: make a towel

Dick: alright new idea?

Wally: that you can eat

Dick: what the fuck

Wally: In flavors of bubblegum blue

Wally: and strawberry pink

Wally: boom

Wally: Cotton candy towels

Dick: No???

Wally: yes

inaccurate Core Four quotes #4

Tim: It costs 400 dollars to go see a therapist but it costs 0 to tell yourself "It be like that sometimes"

Kon, softly: Wha- No. Are you okay?

Cassie: Aren't you rich?

Bart: But, what if I start taxing you every time you say that?

Tim: Do you wanna die, Bart?

Bart: This is an economy, Tim. Nothing you do is free.

Cassie: Bart, who taught you that?

Bart, shrugging: I read it in a book somewhere.

Kon: uhm...

Cassie: Tim, you're literally rich, just pay for therapy.

Tim: No.

Bart: Why not?

Tim: Cause eat the rich.

Tim: Also student debt.

Bart: You're gonna eat somebody??

Kon: Bart, remember when we talked about metaphores?

Bart: That makes a lot more sense.

Cassie: You all need therapy.

Kon: And you don't?

Cassie: I punch things. That's theraputic.

Bart: What's therapy?

Kon: ...

Cassie: ...

Tim: ...

Cassie: Tim-

Tim, dialing Black Canary's number: Already on it.

Kon: Are you telling me you've never talked about your problems to anyone?

Bart: Why would I? problems are meant to be solved by yourself as a self discovering journy and bottled up emotions.

Kon: where'd you learn that?

Bart: Steven Universe.

Cassie: Guys, can we focus please?

Tim: She's on her way.

Bart: Who's on her way?

Cassie, wrapping a blanket around Barts shoulders: Shhh, we're gonna take care of you now.

Bart: But I'm fine-

Tim: There there, speed demon. You're in good hands.

Bart: ... sniffs thank you.

Kon: nods approvingly

inaccurate Core Four quotes #3

Tim: I'm at that age where I have only one thing on my mind.

Bart: Your massive crush on Kon?

Cassie: Student Debt?

Tim: holding a birdarang Homicide.

Tim: I'm about to stab someone.

Bart: Please don't.

Cassie: slowly takes the weapon

inaccurate Batfam quotes #33

Tim and his adventures with the stubborn demi-goddess the chaotic genius and the mom friend

absolute silence in the room

Bart: Tim, have you given Kon his shirt back?

Cass: Probably not.

Tim: Stop patronizing me. hisses

Kon: That was my favourite shirt, bro.

Tim: TOO BAD!

Enveryone: silence

Bart: ...So pizza for dinner?

Cass: Yea, sounds good.

Kon: Mhmm.

///////////////////////////

Cass, walking in: Morning hoes!

Bart: Language!

Tim: Am not!

Kon: Only on weekends!

///////////////////////////

Tim: Ok, who gave bugs the right-

Bart: Insects have been around for aproxamatly 350 million years while homosapians only for 130,000 years.

Kon: He has a point.

Tim: It's a stupid point.

Bart: No wonder Blue Beetle takes over. Cause of people like you, Timmy Drake.

Tim: Wha-?

Kon: Respect your elders, Tim.

///////////////////////////

Tim, texting the group chat: Yo

Tim: am I the only one online..?

Tim: Good.

Tim: Penis

Kon: Wtf

Bart: PROFANITIES

Cass: Nice.

///////////////////////////

Bart, bursting into the room: WHO THE FUCK SIGNED ME UP FOR WEBKINZ EMAIL UPDATES?!

Tim and Cass: snickering to themselves

Kon: I'll give you one guess-

inaccurate Batfam quotes #32

(Idea from a good friend on instagram: Barbara :3)

Wayne Manor but Quarantine

Bruce: Realizes he'll be practically trapped in his house with all his crazy™ kids and he sighs internally, externally, eternally...

Selina: Goes on her "shopping sprees" because since everything is closed security is short-staffed. ;) but she's having a great time with it. She also makes this time to bond with all the kids cause she wants to be the best step-mom UwU

Dick: All his brothers bet on how long he'd last. He lasted a day. (Tim won the bet) He Becomes depressed after a week and has often been seen on the lounge couch in pajamas and a robe eating a tub of ice cream and watching mean girls. Constantly talking about wanting to go see Wally and being shot down. (It doesn't matter tho cause Wally comes to see him anyway)

Babs: Does not mind quarantine. Stays healthy and active. Get's REALLY into TikTok and Instagram. Starts like- 5 new hobbies: Yoga, makeup art, making TikTok memes (and forcing Dick to be in some of them) etc.

Jason: Doesn't care about the warnings. Leaves the house a lot. Goes to public places. Since everything is closed he chills on rooftops or sometimes even parks. Occasionally joined by Roy Harper. helps Alfred with a lot of meals cause we all know he's second best when it comes to cooking in the family.

Steph: Panic buys the entire stock of waffles and other snack items. Is really worried about the warnings at first but everyone comforted her so she'd calm down. (Jason fakes coughs every now and then around her for laughs) Most of the time chilling in her own room or in Tim's just snacking.

Tim: Is not effected by Quarantine. He was already a Hermit to begin with. Now he had an excuse to be inside all the time so he's doing great. Get's really into Animal Crossing on his switch and chills with Steph a lot if he's not staying up playing online with Bart and Kon. Steph already bought him the stock of coffee so he had no worries.

Dami: Takes Quarantine VERY seriously. His brothers tease him for caring but he responds with "I only care about my own health and the general public. We are heroes and need to set examples to protect our city." Or somthing along those lines. (he does actually care tho)

Duke: Tries not to let it get to him. He's maxin' chillaxin'. Spends his time pranking everyone else to get their spirits up. (we do not deserve this lovely boi) Starts a prank war and Nerf gun/water gun fight with everyone. Even Bruce joined.

Alfred: The actual GLUE to everyone not losing their minds. Enjoys teaching Babs cooking as a new hobby she picked up and loves chatting over making food with Jason. Get's to rest a lot more since at least one of the boys or Steph does spontanious chores just to do something and being all and all the best Butler/Grandfather ever. (as per usual)

Harper: HATES quarantine. She goes to the skate park a lot with a skateboard or rollar blades cause her hockey team is cancelled the entire season and she needs the release. Dyes her hair at least 5 times, all different colours.

Cass: Trains a lot. Reads a lot. Stays in the background of everything. Selina focuses on bonding with her mostly and they form a really lovely connection over the time spent together.

Do you ever forget you have superpowers? Kon does often.

It’s still a sweet gesture.

You have no idea the demons I fought to not turn this little comic angsty. I might still do it, I haven’t decided yet.

For some unfathomable reason Kon doesn’t like Jason that much.

We are once again entering headcannon alley where everything I say goes. So basically Tim has never really been good at receiving or giving compliments to people, instead he usually just ends up listing attributes or characteristics that person has (wether it’s good or bad he’ll just point it out and in his mind it counts as a compliment.). His understanding is that to be seen is to be loved, so most of his ‘compliments’ are him calling out repeated traits or actions. For example, a compliment he might give to Jason, or maybe Damian, would be “You have a short temper.” Or “ You often solve problems with violence.”

he’s not trying to call people out or anything, he just genuinely thinks it’s a compliment to pick up on other peoples patterns and let them know that he’s noticed them.

Another compliment he might give is something extremely straightforward and obvious like “You have Blue eyes.”

anyways hope you enjoyed my little rant and my little art work! Thank you all so much for all of the love!

Kon was only supposed to have like two or three piercings but somehow he ended up with more. This is my first time drawing him but I love him so much

At first he'd been overjoyed that the cloning had worked. Then, as the weeks went by, he realized just how messed up of a thing he had done. Tim still remembered the faces of everyone after he told them. There were mixes of shock, horror and disappointment. He'd been unable to face both Bruce and Clark for a while after that.

Now Tim sat in a rocking chair within the newly decorated nursery. He looked down at the baby in his lap, who returned his gaze with a blank one of his own.

He sighed as he turned to peer out the window. It was a full moon tonight. "They're mad at me, I know," he finally spoke. "I can't really blame them either. It wasn't fair to Conner. To his memory."

Tim turned to look at the baby once more. He stared into the baby's eyes. Those painfully familiar eyes that were at the same time new and foreign.

"It wasn't fair to you either."

Tim reached down and brushed a bang out of the baby's eyes. "But I swear I'm going to make it up," he continued. "Starting by giving you your own proper name."

Until now, that baby had been referred to as just that. Baby. If not that it was the clone, the child or Conner's clone. But now that Tim had firmly decided he was raising the baby, the kid needed a proper name.

"Hmm," Tim pondered. "What about.... Kevin?"

He received yet another blank look.

"Okay... how about Alex, Wes, Kyle? Timothy Jr?"

Blank stare.

"You could be Douglas. Doug for short."

At that the baby seemed to almost quirk up his eyebrow. As if to say, "Are you serious?" Though that was probably Tim's mind playing tricks on him.

"Yeah," he said with a soft chuckle. "I wasn't really feeling that one either."

Tim closed his eyes and tilted his head to the side. "Mark, Luke, Ezekiel, Thomas, Elijah..." Great, now he was just listing off Bible names.

"Daniel..." he muttered absently.

Suddenly, Tim heard a giggle. He looked back down at the baby to see him cooing softly.

"Wait, you like that? Daniel?"

The baby giggled again. This time reaching up towards Tim. Hesitantly, he raised his hand towards the child. He couldn't help the soft gasp that escaped him as the child grabbed onto his pointer finger.

"Ok, Daniel it is."

Except for something still didn't feel right. Tim leaned back and stared at the ceiling as his tried to pinpoint the feeling of wrongness. Then it hit him. He hated whenever people used his full name. It always felt stuffy and formal. It reminded him too much of disappointed looks. Of hands gripping his shoulders or pulling at his ears, telling him to behave.

"Say," he murmured. "Mind if I give you a nickname buddy? How about Dan?"

Daniel scrunched up his eyebrows. "Ok ok, you don't like that one. I get it. Then how about Danny?"

Daniel seemed to appreciate that nickname a whole lot more as him went back to cooing contently. Tim couldn't help as a smile of his own crept onto his face. "It's settled then," he grinned, holding his child up in the air. "Welcome to the family Danny Drake-Wayne!"

He then pulled Danny close into an embrace, closing his eyes as he took in the scent of baby powder and formula. "I promise, you'll have a better childhood than either I or Kon did. I'll make sure of it."

Edit: original prompt for anyone interested

if you go into Tim Drake comics with the expectations that tumblr and fanfiction have given you, you are going to be met with the rude awakening that is feral asshole Tim with minimal reaction to social cues. Like yes I love him. Yes he is self-deprecating and kind of insecure. Yes he's a genius and yes he's been screwed over by his family a lot. He is also a bit of a dick.

Bio Dad Danny!

Part 3 Everybody! And Happy new year!

When Danny got back from the summoning he immediately started shutting down anyway for cultists to get his summoning in this universe, and with that out of the way went back to how life was before the now known dub "summoning", he still had to take summonings from other universes but he always left Fright Night to babysit and surprising enough Conner wasn't Frightened by the Halloween Ghost, he hopes that the Justice League (he had to look up their name) would only use his personal summoning for emergencies (and always away from Conner).

Conner's first birthday was coming up and Danny already had Dani and Dan coming over for the day plus Dan said he was bringing Clockwork to introduce the baby to him. So Danny went out as usual with Conner to go get the Cake for the next day it was a little bakery only a 30 min walk from his place, it was good exercise if anything. But of course there had to be another subpar villain causing trouble seems to be one of Superman's if him being there was any consolation.

So Danny tried hurrying to the Bakery but before he could a green rock landed near them, Conner immediately started crying and squirming in his baby wrap, while Danny was strict with the soul crushing sadness and pain that came from the rock, he lands on his knees hunched over Conner he tried to back the tears in his eyes, his face rigid with focus that he had to get away from the thing causing them pain, then all of a sudden he was picked up and dropped off far away from the fight with a group of people by the Flash.

Glad to be away from the stone, Danny put his focus on calming down Conner by cooling his fingers and letting the baby bite on them, what Danny hadn't noticed was that the Flash saw how they reacted to the Kryptonite and the relief when they were away from it, but flash wasn't done helping People to safer zones so he continued till the Fight was over but by the time they were done and he went to go check with the black haired man with his child they were gone. Flash then had to question, was Superman the last Kryptonian?

Danny upon getting back to his apartment held his breath momentarily cuddling close with Conner trying to rid the last of the feeling of what he now realizes was the death of planet and it's civilization. "I guess we'll have to get you your birthday cake tomorrow, huh, bud?" Danny looked adoring at his child.

Part 1 , Part 2

@honeysuckletook @chrysanthemum9484