DC Groupchats As Some Of My Favourite Homestuck Quotes Pt. 1

inaccurate Batfam quotes #11

Tim: If I ever meet the first person who said "I'll sleep when I'm dead" I'm going to kill them.

Dick: Relax, Tim. Just drink your coffee.

Tim: This isn't even coffee. It's a 12 pack of Five hour energy mixed with cocoa powder...

Jason: An entire pack of 12 hour energy?

Tim: Does anyone else see the talking squirril?

Dick: uhhh, Tim? Squirrils don't talk.

Tim: Cool, just checking my sanity.

jaybart headcanons pls

Ffs I just saw this cause tumblr didn’t notify me of any requests and I checked manually, rip. anyways, ABSOLUTELY! You’re in for a treat

• Bart has an oral fixation, which means he has a bad habit of biting the inside of his cheek or his tongue. Jason always has sucking candies (suckers, mints, life savers, etc) on him to keep him from doing that

• Jason is a classical literature geek while Bart is a comic nerd, and they often debate over plot devices used in their respective books

• Both of them have different comforts when it comes to calming a nightmare. When Jason wakes up, images of green tinted vision and uncontrollable rage pushing him to the brink of insanity, Bart knows not to touch him since that could be a trigger. Instead he sits some ways away from Jason and asks him simple questions (what colour is the sky? How old are you?) or walks him through the 5 senses trick until he’s grounded back to the present. When Bart is startled awake with a choked off scream, as he watches himself die over and over again and it feels like his body is being torn apart down to the molecular level, Jason has to hug him from behind tightly, staying silent and breathing exaggeratedly to get Bart to match to remind him that yes he’s alive and still there, not in a VR simulator or dead in the speedforce

• They don’t have constant contact with each other since their schedules are very different and both of them have missions at different times, so all of their texts are spread far apart and never say a typical ‘hi’ or ‘miss you’. Most consist of complaints about their day or a sudden random thought (“your brother is being a real dick, pun intended, planning on pranking him. How does he feel about paint in his hair?”) the other won’t see or reply for hours but they are perfectly content with that, they still see each other in person often enough.

• Bart has a way of getting Jason to do absolutely anything and it’s not by batting his ridiculously pretty doe eyes like one might think (though that is one method) Bart just challenges Jason into bets or trades and Jason caves cause his competitive, chaotic side wins over every. Single. Time.

• Bart doesn’t hold it against Jason not getting along with the rest of the bats like people typically do. (Mostly cause Bart’s got his own issues he needs to iron out with the flashfam even if him and Wally are on semi decent terms now) Even though Tim is one of his best friends, he listens to Jay’s complaints without bias and laughs at the dramatic retellings of their outings

• Similarly, Jason doesn’t hold Bart’s villain heritage over him like a lot tend to do when they find out about it. (Seeing as most of his family has some sort of bad blood) and he encourages Bart to reach out to his brother (Owen) despite him being a rogue (cause Bart deserves some family damnit!)

I have more but I didn’t want to overdo it in one. <3

On a previous post I said that Bart is the only one in the core four that can actually flirt and i stand by what i said. But it’s only cause he accidentally flirts by being so blunt all the time and no one can change my mind.

Bart: *holding a piece of pizza but staring at Tim*

Tim: what?

Bart: just debating if i wanna eat this or kiss you rn.

————————

Kon: morning Bart.

Bart, without skipping a beat: you look great today. New hair gel?

————————

Jason: why are you so close-

Bart: nothin’. You just have really pretty eyes.

You cant tell me he wouldn’t.

Today’s the day

Me: I kinda feel bad for people not part of this fandom having to endure today... Also me: send every GIF, meme, Carrier pigeon, and brick out there. This *dolphin censor* gonna spread like Mary Winchester’s Celing fire.

Danny Phantom as a Green Lantern

Danny Phantom as a Green Lantern

Danny Phantom as a Green Lantern

Danny Phantom as a Green Lantern

Danny Phantom as a Green Lantern

Danny Phantom as a Green Lantern

Danny Phantom as a Green Lantern

Danny Phantom as a Green Lantern

Dedicated to @legendofepic and your friend 💕 thank you for your support!!

Any good dad bruce hcs?

everything I’ve ever written is good dad bruce and I don’t believe in anything else and I will die on the hill of good dad Bruce

bruce has skipped multiple justice league meetings because his kids asked him to stay home

he carries like jolly ranchers and starburst and candy like that in his utility belt because when dick was a kid be used to beg bruce to get him ice cream on every patrol and this was the best way bruce could find to get him to stop asking

When Jason was Robin, they made it a habit of going to every home game the Gotham Knights had whether it was Bruce and Jason eating hot dogs in the stands at the baseball stadium or Batman and Robin watching the field, hidden somewhere where they’ve got a perfect view

I think because of my dad I just associate dads with Star Trek now but like... Bruce watches Star Trek with his kids. Tim’s the only one who watched more than just the original series with him

Bruce had an exact replica made of his mother’s iconic pearl necklace (you know the one) and gave it to Cass for her birthday one year and she absolutely treasures it

Damian isn’t the most extroverted person and neither is Bruce so most of their interactions are just sitting in the room together (this also goes for Tim and Cass with these two) but a lot of times when Bruce is working from home Damian will sit in his office and draw and every so often if Bruce is on a zoom call for work he tends to mute his mic so he can just chat with Damian about whatever he’s drawing and all that

Also: Bruce and Damian tend to walk Ace and Titus together every morning. Sometimes Jason comes too to walk Ace instead of Bruce, but Bruce is always there

So this is more of a personal opinion but the Teen Titans run in 2003 is… really painful to read as someone who got really attached to the Young Justice (98) run. For a whooole number of reasons.. but today I will concentrate on bart (because like for the past three days al ive talked about is bart) 

Because the first issues are all “Impulse you’re so fucking useless” and “ew don’t touch me” and “Oh my god conner i missed you so much” and absolutely nobody believes in Bart. And it pisses me off. 

Wally was written as such a fucking asshole. “I took things seriously” OH IM SORRY MR PERFECT THAT NEVER FUCKING GOOFED AROUND AND HAD FRIENDS AND GOT EXCITED AND USED HIS POWERS TO HIS ADVANTAGE???? and suddenly bart does it and he’s such a fucking failure and he’s not good enough???? Give me a fucking BREAK. “I founded the titans” okay yes do you want a gold star??? So petty and for what smh

And I mean… bart is so… he’s bart. and I absolutely love him. He’s just excited, and people take this as ridiculously stupid and immature. And YES i have read the issues where bart spends three solid minutes talking to a cardboard cut-out of the flash, but he’s just a kid… he deserves better than whatever the fuck this run is

…. let that one linger. I mean I’m no Bart but hearing that hurts. A lot. 

And Cassandra (i refuse to call whoever she is ‘cassie’) was such a bitch to him?? i get that she got expelled from school but the rest is all bullshit (cassandra here got expulsed because she threw a tantrum and gave out her secret idenity to the whole school and used her powers, which already tells you that this is out of character- although she might have done something similar but she wouldn’t go as far as she did)

You can’t even blame Bart for being ‘immature’ and ‘childish’ here because they’re literally 16???? 17 at most and Cassandra is written as such a fucking bitchhh in the whole runnn and im pretty sure all my mutuals hate me for saying it so often but it makes me so angry (as you probably noticed). And I’m not talking about the costume design (although, if you ask me it’s really out of character and also its ugly and my baby cassie would have done waay better than that. I mean she had biker shorts because they were good to kick in and now she has JEANS???? and a belt to top that WITH A HEADBAND???? cassie is a barette bitch and her hair is short because she likes it like that and she would rather die than get bangs). And I don’t know what’s going on with her, but what the fuck is up with tim?? I’m sure he’s got his shit going on at home with batsy but like…. fuck you

they’re all being such assholes to bart, but he’s there nonetheless, energetic and bubbly, as if nothing’s happened. He even had a heart-to-back with Cassandra (you can guess who spilled their heart and who gave their back)

Oh and don’t let me forget that after this, Cassandra still thinks on leaving. But then cOnNeR goes “no you belong here” and cassandra goes “aw youre right lets kiss now” (not that i have anything against kon or the ship but it was just taken to extremes in this run, because conner this and conner that and lets clone my dead best friend and your boyfriend oh and lets kiss too because we totally dont do that enough)

Now they’re at this prison of sorts and there’s a fire, and there’s smoke and Bart takes in consideration that he might hurt someone if he goes too fast (because of the smoke) 

And oh im sorry okay cassie no need to use THAT tone (although ill let it slide, it’s cool i get it- sorta)

AND THEN BECAUSE ITS TOTALLY NOT MOTHERFUCKING ENOUGH BECAUSE NOBODY HAS NEGLECTED BART ENOUGH ALREADY THIS HAPPENS

“help out impulse” NO FUCK YOU???? ‘Oh impulse the smoke just magically cleared stop being so useless” EXCUSE YOU???? and may i add that kori is also… not that nice to bart…

OH AND MAY I ADD THAT AS BART WENT IN THE BUILDING (because KORY told him to) HE GOT SHOT WITH A TRANQUILIZER THAT IMMOBILIZED HIM FOR A FUCKING HALF MINUTE AND THEN SLADE BLEW HIS KNEECAP OFF??? AND IT DIDN’T OCCUR TO FUCKING KORY THAT IT WAS HER THAT TOLD HIM TO GO IN THE FIRST PLACE???? hhh

call me insane but this is just…. really out of character (then again almost the whole thing is) because you can’t tell me that Cassie and Kon (and tim and cissie and greta and literally anyone that bart has ever interacted with because that’s the effect that he has on people) wouldn’t destroy every piece of shit in their way to blow off slade’s other eye. and after this they do go after slade but like hhhhhhhhhhhhh my boy deserves better okay reading these issues is just liek pouring bleach in my eyes its just… sigh

OH AND THEN BART GOT AGED UP AND IM LIKE OKAY AND THNE HE DIED RIGHT AND THEY GRIEVED HIM FOR LIKE TWO MINUTES AND THEN THEY WENT BACK TO CLONING CONNER AND IM JUST LIKE???????

inaccurate Flashfam quotes #7

Bart: Barry, I like boys. And I'm in love with Ed!

Barry: *confused about confrontation* Okay, I'm glad you told me, Bart.

Wally: ooo, about that...

Barry: wait- what?

Wally: There's a reason I've been hanging out with Dick more often.

Barry: ...

Barry: Do any of you kids like girls?

Jenni: I do.

Barry: *tired sigh*

Hal "glowstick" Jordan: Is this a good time to tell the kids?

The teams reaction to Bart complaining

Bart: Wally and I had a fight.

Tim: I’m sure he didn’t mean it.

_

Bart: Wally and I had a fight.

Kon: did you win?

-

Bart: Wally and I had a fight.

Cassie: next time, go for the eyes and then strike the throat-