"It's 2 In The Morning And I Wish You Here. Stupid Right..."

Look at me! I’m the strongest in the sea. My lungs take in the water like it’s air and send it out with great flair. Look at me! I’m humble like the earth, my arms stretch out to hug the masses as my heart burns what’s left of ashes. Look at me! I’m fluid like the air, moving about without a care, letting those who wrong me pass me by until I’m left alone to die. Look at me. I’m alone like fire. Don’t get too close, I’m a broken wire, threatening to burn and combust into nothing. Look at me. My humble trying and desperate crying did nothing to appease those demons. My heart was burned and left to nothing as I sit here in solemn quiet. Look at me.

Look at what I’ve done

My worst nightmare is waking up to you not next to me. That you will fall out of love. That all of the little things I do will start to annoy you. My worst nightmare is being there when you kiss another girl. That everything about us was a lie. My worst nightmare is watching you walk out on what we had.

Losing you is my biggest fear

A sleepless night isn't as bad as it could be when I am talking with you.

2 am Thoughts

Sitting in complete silence with you isn't awkward anymore. In fact, it brings me great joy in knowing that just my presence is enough for you. And that we don't need to do anything of extravagance is a comfort of its very own.

While you slept with your dog

Why do I like you? That’s a hard question to answer. I will always have a different answer to give you when you ask because I like so much about you. From your smile to the way you laugh, even how you talk about things you love. You think I don’t notice these things but I do and they are exactly why I like you.

Because I'm in like with you

I don't know how to tell you that you're perfect without seeming like I'm some asshole who doesn't know the difference between the book definition and someone who knows what true beauty is. But that's what you are. Perfect. Not the book description, you are the picture of beauty in my mind. You think you're not perfect but you are. And I hope you can understand that this is the truth and that whatever anyone else tells you and if it drags you down, they are wrong. You are perfect.

- because you asked me to describe something indescribable

How do you love someone who won’t love you back? Easy. You suffer in silence and pray for something to stop the pain. Whether or not it is the person you love is completely up to circumstance. But I can’t say I’d take love from someone else over the bullet to heart that you so easily gave to me.

From the bottom of my (not yet dead) heart

I thought I knew what love was.  Love was sitting in my health class sophomore year. Love wouldn't date me until one of us could drive a car. Love played lacrosse and was a goalie, we bonded over that. Then college came 2 years later, and love left as quickly as it came.  Love became constant fights about pointless things. Love became jealous and controlling. Love ended at roughly 11:30 pm on a Tuesday night. Turns out I didn't know what love was. A month later, love's ugly cousin loneliness came in disguised as love. Loneliness was a scrawny blonde who tried to be "country". Loneliness couldn't play sports, but I was okay with that as long as I wasn't alone. Loneliness became an on and off relationship that I couldn't let go of because it had love's fond embrace. I used loneliness as an excuse to date. Loneliness left on Mother's Day around 11:30 AM, and I went to the store because I didn't know why I was so sad that loneliness, the one I had been begging myself to leave, was gone. Turns out, love also went to the store that day. Love had also just gotten out of a long term relationship. Love had texted me a few days prior to make fun of me because that was what love had done when we were friends in the past. This love was different than the love that sat in sophomore year health class. This love was sporadic 45 minute conversations in the most random places. This love popped up when I needed it the most at any point in my life. This love accepted me for who I am. Love has a fast car, and a motorcycle. Love knows I like to play with my hair. Love knows I don't get out much, but love is ok with that because he brings me to the most beautiful places. But between you and me, I don't care where this love takes me, because, I know what love is, and he treats me the right way and has the most beautiful hazel eyes and the cutest dimples I've ever seen. I know what love is because he sleeps next to me (almost) every night. I know what love is and he is the most authentic man I have ever met.

Love is in my thoughts 

Everyone who reblogs this before New Years (11:59 PM 12/31/17)

will be given a small art piece based off of their blog! (Well a photo over Tumblr of it but it’ll be good quality)

And I mean EVERYONE as long as it’s before the end date! Reblog fast for cute art things!

I thought I'd be fine when you decided to leave. But here I am in a puddle of my own tears and trying to figure out to turn off these damned things called emotions.

2 AM Thoughts