Had A Low Fever For Almost A Week Now, But Am Refusing To See A Doctor Cause "not Like They Would Do

i miss travelling without basically taking a mini pharmacy with me

i hate when i, a completely healthy person (very chronically ill), get sick (flare up) for no reason at all (i exerted myself way past my limit just cuz i didn’t wanna be “annoying”)

i'm tired of being scared of how i feel

having insomnia when having a chronic illness sucks!

my chronic illness flares up cause i don't get enough sleep, but i don't get enough sleep cause of my chronic illness

this is why i always have headphones in

"it's not polite" well neither is my pain so fuck off

"Stop looking at your phone"

No. I need a constant distraction from the pain I am in. I promise you, you'd rather see me play solitaire on my phone for 45 mins than deal with me while being fully aware of my body. I PROMISE YOU I am listening better if i'm fiddling on my phone than if I'm sitting and being aware of my agony.

Also to everyone who has ever called me an iPad kid, die in a hole.

being chronically ill it's so difficult to not dismiss healthy people struggleing with a short time illness

like "i'm sorry you got a cough, i have to make big adjustments to my everyday life to not regularly faint" is not the answer i wanna give others

saying "oh you're tired cause you stayed up on tiktok for too long? i didn't sleep at all cause of how much pain i was in" isn't empathetic

it's just hard not to compare my suffering to others seemingly minor issues

i always need to remind myself that this isn't minor to them, no matter how i might feel about it... i refuse to loose my empathy in addition to everything else i have to limit

Whoever decided to force chronically ill/physically disabled kids to do p.e should be hunted for sport

navigating doctors visits and applying for university in the same week while going to school should be a valid answer if asked what exercises i do

my back pain is so bad today idk how i'm supposed to do things or even sleep!

i'm already doing physio therapy so idk what else to do about it at this point

[cheerfully] i've been in self-made hells worse than this