Clint Stuck In A Chair: You May Be Asking “Clint, How Did This Happen? How Did You Do This To Yourself?”

“Not you”

And Carol walks in the door drinking Starbucks.

Peter: *comes home at 2 am*

Tony: where were you?

Peter: with cap

Cap: *turns his chair * wanna try again?

“Where are you thinking of going?”

“New Jersey”

*Forgive me Brooklyn. I have sinned*

-Steve Rogers

Peter talking to a tired Thor: So what’s Loki to you?

Thor: The reason I get up in the morning...

Peter: Really?! That’s cool

What Heimdall watched happen:

Loki: Hey...

Brother

Thor: *continues snoring*

Loki: Blergh *stabs him*

I never sleep cause of you

Everyone needs to see this

Yo baby peter parkerr, how about a headcannon of peter saying ok boomer to Tony xD

•  Peter 100% uses “ok boomer” all the time. He uses it and Tony is genuinely confused.

peter: ok boomer.

tony:

•  Peter will use it both as a sarcastic response to being told to do something he doesn’t want, and as an enthusiastic response. He likes being a meme, but he also doesn’t hate Tony like we all hate (shitty) boomers.

tony: hey, kid, would you pass me that screwdriver over there—

peter, already sprinting to get the screwdriver: oK BOOMER!!! 🧡💕💝💝🧡💖❤️🧡💕

tony: what the actual fuck

•  You can FEEL the heart emojis when he gives an enthusiastic “ok boomer” That said, when he’s truly upset with Tony, he’ll give a snarky, “ok boomer.” It’s like… the difference between when you receive a text that has a period and one that has an exclamation point. Like “ok!” vs “ok.” It’s tangible.

tony: whAT DID I DO WRONG WHY IS HE MAD

•  Eventually, Tony picks up on the habit. He finds himself wanting to say, “ok boomer,” whenever Pepper gets on his case. Once or twice he gets super close to actually saying it.

tony: oh god it’s contagious

•  But then one day it’s Steve who says something annoying and he stands there like

steve: the way you’re behaving is childish. you need to start taking the team seriously. if you don’t step your game up, people are going to get hurt. are you seriously that self centered that you’re okay with that? clean up your act, tony.

tony, internally: oh god he was born in like the early 1900s he’s the closest thing to a boomer we have on the team oh my god I could utterly destroy him with a crisp “ok boomer” peter would be so proud oh god the opportunity is perfect I’m VIBRATING with excitement oh gOD

tony, monotone: ok boomer

tony, internally: THIS IS MY GREATEST ACHIEVEMENT

•  Peter stands in the background cheering, and the scene looks Iike

Loki summoning daggers:

Where is it?!

Thor frantically trying to calm him down:

Loki, wait!! You should treat spiders how you wish to be treated!

Loki:

Killed without hesitation!

Thor:

Not again! Please stop dying!

Oof

“What do you know about infectious diseases?” -teacher

“They spread” -person

“Does that make sluts diseases?” -me

Peter our as Spider-Man talking to a criminal: Where can I find a wheelchair?

Criminal who’s rant was interrupted: What? Why?

Peter: Cause I can’t stand bullshit

“Sometimes words aren’t enough and that’s why we have middle fingers.”

- Clint.

Ned: Oh shit.

Peter: Don’t swear around May!

May: Oh, no it’s fi-

Ned: Mamma Mia that’s a spicy meatball!

May: You know what just say fuck