I Could Make Traps For Free Noctis If You Want. Some Kill And Others Just Bring Pain Or Traumatize People

Cor: Prompto, I need you to sign this. It's very important for the Lucis.

Prompto: *starts to sign it* so what is it? A treaty? A petition for something?

Cor: *takes the paper* adoption papers. You're now my son. *walks away*

I turned on the volume to hear it pop. Now I’m disappointed

By plantpotters

Sigma: So what do we do now?

Nikolai: I have a solution.

Sigma: No.

Nikolai: You didn’t hear it!

Sigma: We are not killing him!

Nikolai: I wasn’t even going to suggest that!

Sigma: Then what?

Nikolai: We kidnap him then mutilate his corpse!

Why Ardyn has banned Alice from drinking.

Ardyn: Alice its late, come home.

Alice: f*** off I'm fine.

Ardyn: I just watched you walk into a light post.

Alice: You can't see me.

Ardyn: I'm right next to you

Alice: liar.

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Alice: (texts) I found your family!

Ardyn: (texts) please don't tell me you dug up another grave....

Alice: (sends him a picture of a bunch of pigs)

Ardyn: (texts) where are you?!

Alice: (texts) wif yor famly

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Person: Does your terrorist organization have an HR?

Sigma: We have an entire HR department for one man.

Nikolai: ….Is this because of last night?

Little Y/n: feeling cute my delete later.

Nero: Can I have my phone back?

Dante: I want copies!

Gaia (my cat) kidnapped Sigma off my bed. I swear if his throat is slit I will cry.

Mc: Why do you send letters that say “I hope this letter finds you before I do”?

Vere: I find it fun to make them paranoid

Sigma: *hiding a knife behind his back* Nikolai. Can you handle eight inches?

Nikolai: I mean I can take Fedya just fine.

Sigma: What?

Nikolai: Forget what I said!

Dazai: I yearn for the urn

Kunikida: Who says you’re being cremated? I’m throwing you in the nearest dumpster when you die.