The BIGGEST Motivator I Currently Have Is The Fact That My Bio-mom Used To Be A MODEL!? You (unfortunately)

Sensitive topic!

TW: svc1d3, mention of 0v3rd0s3, 4lch0h0l p0¡s¡0n¡ng, and s3lf h4rm as well as other issues, please read at your own risk.

basically, I probably won’t be active anymore, I’m planning on km$ today, sometime during the night. I’ve had a cranky shitty 4ss life. I don’t look forward to anything anymore and I feel like absolute shit. I’ve got everything ready, the letters, all that bs. The only thing I want for now is the final step. No quote can turn my the cogs in my brain, no kind of guilt will convince me otherwise. This has been the only thing I look forward too. And I truly, entirely cannot fathom how much I desire the mere suggestion of d34th. I feel as if my whole world lights up. And for once, as soon I take the final step, one final push, I will feel like a true free bird. Of course, I’ve always wanted to at least have some fun before I d¡3, I plan on dr¡nk¡ng down the p¡11s I’ll take, I used to just merely cvt myself yet the pleasure of bl00d flowing out is no longer enough.

goodbye cruel world, sincerely, everyx.

tip for people who are fasting !! if you can drink water i highly reccomend adding lemon and cucumber slices!! it gives the water a sweet taste,

despretely in need of an almond mom, i geniunely cant do this shit alone i swear

“its seems so long,

i need someone”

im gonna go insane i was f4sting like the best damn 4na and went down 2kg in js a couple days but now im in a cycle of f4sting then b1ng1ng and then f4sting GOD atp only those 4na gcs with super strict rules or h3ll even a damn coach

considering this for the rest of february or march

what if i only ate an apple a day for the whole of January

i wont stay up late, again!

and then i stay up late again.

can someone explain to me WHY i crave alcohol even though im not an alcoholic and have only had extremely small sips that were soon spat out???

Triggering movies/shows to watch

Movies:

•to the bone

•Starving In Suburbia

•Perfect Body

•Little Miss Perfect

•For The Love of Nancy

•When Friendship Kills

•The Best Little Girl In The World

•Thin (Documentary)

•Hunger Point

•A Secret Between Friends

•The brief life of Catherine

•black swan

•The Secret Life of Mary Margare

Shows:

•skins (uk)

•Flesh and Bone the TV show

•secret eaters

•any Victoria secret model walk shows (2000s)

•super size vs super skinny

•1000 lbs sisters

•my 600 lbs life

•Too F@t for Love

•F@t Families

I going to cry i wanna finish my steps but I'm so tired and i feel the binge coming, I'm so frustrated

that damn period always ruin my days