JJ : Emily, You Can't Do That, It's Against The Law !

Emily : I have an excellent memory ! Name one time I forgot something.

Morgan : You left me in a Walmart parking lot like, three weeks ago.

Emily : I did that on purpose, try again.

Reid : There's nothing worse than someone using big words that they don't understand just to look smart.

Morgan, nodding : I photosynthesize with this.

Reid : Life is just like a game of chess.

Morgan : I DON'T KNOW HOW TO PLAY CHESS

Therapist : And remember, you are your own worst enemy.

Reid, somehow proud : Undefeated dude

Reid : Do you ever get water hungry ?

Hotch : ...Thirsty ?

Reid, nodding : Water hungry.

Hotch, finding a bunch of knives every time Emily is somewhere : What's that ??

Emily : That's my emotional support knife collection. To help me deal with people.

Hotch : ...We should be tracking YOU down.

Garcia : Okay I have a riddle. What's green, red, and spins really quickly ?

Emily : A frog in a mixer.

Garcia : That's right ! An elf on a merry-go-round-

Garcia :

Emily :

Garcia : Emily, I don't say this often, but what in the actual fuck-

Emily : I get the point of the phrase "hurt people hurt people" but I just hear a command twice

Therapist, on a meeting with Reid : And what do we do when we are sad ?

Reid : Get a new PhD.

Therapist : No-

Morgan : Flirt with cute girls.

Therapist : ...What ? Wait, where did you come from ?

Garcia : Buy way too much cute stuff to forget.

Hotch : Work way too much.

Rossi : Hyper focus and be paranoid about killers.

Therapist, clearly not ready for this, or for people popping out of nowhere : Wait-

Emily : Fake death while getting high.

JJ : Close up and be completely silent.

Therapist :

Therapist, throwing their files on the ground : ...Nope. I quit.

Emily : When I get doordash I order 20 cheeseburgers at a time and heat them up throughout the week so that I don't have to pay the delivery fee multiple times

Hotch : I hope you understand how food poisoning works

Emily : And I hope food poisoning knows how I work because I never met a burger I couldn't eat.