You’ve Heard Of “may The 4th Be With You” — Now Get Ready For “may Thy 9th Chip And Shatter”

you’ve heard of “may the 4th be with you” — now get ready for “may thy 9th chip and shatter”

You’ve Heard Of “may The 4th Be With You” — Now Get Ready For “may Thy 9th Chip And Shatter”
You’ve Heard Of “may The 4th Be With You” — Now Get Ready For “may Thy 9th Chip And Shatter”

More Posts from Briefkittenearthquake and Others

11 months ago

Just Spencer Reid spinning in his chair roughly 11 years apart

Just Spencer Reid Spinning In His Chair Roughly 11 Years Apart

01x01

Just Spencer Reid Spinning In His Chair Roughly 11 Years Apart

12x04

Bonus: Gideon looking dead inside while Spencer keeps spinning in the background

Just Spencer Reid Spinning In His Chair Roughly 11 Years Apart
9 months ago

I’m bored have at it

Reblog if you'll PUBLICLY answer anything in your ask right now.

Im game

3 months ago

How it started

How It Started

How it's going

How It Started
How It Started
How It Started
How It Started
How It Started
How It Started
How It Started
How It Started
How It Started
8 months ago

FUTURE MAN BUT IF IT WAS A BOOK?!?!

FUTURE MAN BUT IF IT WAS A BOOK?!?!

hi hi ^_^ !! so i decided to start a serious of future man but if it was a book !!! honestly im doing this for my own entertainment but you can read it if you want! it will be posted in chapters :D

all rights belong to Hulu and the creators and producers of Future man, this is just for fun! Not my original story, just the series in story form! Some parts I will not write about (one example being the YOU KNOW WHAT scene with his mom) and will be toning down and will be changing slight scenes and such to make it to how I like :) this doesn’t mean everything will be changed! Just snippets.

I hope you enjoy!

FUTURE MAN BUT IF IT WAS A BOOK?!?!

PROLOGUE - Future Man (S1)

Burning. Fire spits out of the pile of paper in the warehouse, panting breaths of a family nearby. Running, from what? Since the war broke out it’s impossible to tell. Fire. The only thing that keeps a person warm, and even now they can’t stay in the same part to comfort themselves. The only thing that keeps them warm is running. Running away from the enemy. A little boy dressed in rags drops his stuffed toy, in the dirt and dampness of the warehouse. He reaches forward, desperate to keep the only thing to comfort him, but his father pulls him back. “Leave it.” he drags him to his feet. “Just leave it.” he spits. They continue running.

And just about in time. When they turn the corner to hide, that’s when the Biotics arrive. Dressed in all black armour, the distinct red lights on their chest blinking. The helmet that covers their fleshy, grotesque appearance, with a gun in hand. The lead Biotic steps on the toy, with no care for human life whatsoever. Biotics don’t have feelings. They don’t have a soul. The family knows they’re coming, and the family knows they’re to be dead soon.

“Behind the dumpster, quick!” the Father exclaims, shoving his poor kids into a corner behind the dumpster, the wife goes next, then him. “Get down, hush.” Their hiding place doesn’t last long. The Biotics are already there. Despite being the worst example of life on the planet, the Biotics are smart. They’ve perfected navigation skills, and have practically perfected everything you can think of. “Please, don’t hurt them!” the father exclaims, grasping onto his kids for dear life, the only thing that keeps him alive is his strive to help his family survive. If they were dead, surely, he’d kill himself. The lead Biotic reaches for him and picks him up by the scruff like a stray cat, he hurdles him into the trash while his wife gives a blood curtling scream. The Biotics are winning. Of course they are, they’re unstoppable.

At least that’s what you’d think.

I lower my high tech binoculars. I watch him hit the ground with a crash. I see the Biotic point his psychoblaster directly at the man’s family. And I don’t flinch as I blow a hole straight through it. The family looks up, terrified, yet, confused. What had caused this Biotic to suddenly go limp? The answer to that question? Me.

I stand straight in my uniform, pointing the gun to where I had perfectly shot a deep, burning hole into the stomach of the Biotic. (That is, if they even have stomachs). It falls, and I lower my gun. I don’t smile. “Now that’s what I call a hole in one.” I’m perfect. From my hair styled neatly, to the padding on my boots. The armour is solid, pure strengthened oppilume, (a metal from my time), with the bright blue wires connecting to my neck brace to keep the Biotics from trying to decapitate me. My shorogyt gloves which hold my own X28 Psychoblaster, given to me by the resistance. But I have no time to gloat, more Biotics are on my way. Their shots fly past me and I shoot back blue rays of electricity, It startles them, they stumble.

I manage to make my way across perfectly, doing flips over piles of garbage. I grab a long metal stick, probably a part of the collapsed building, on my way and stick it straight through another Biotic. As I crush his skull, I kick another into an electrical box, causing sparks to fly and for the Biotic to go limp. Three down. One to go. “There’s the shock.” I say confidently, the family hugs one another, the father manages to limp back towards his wife and kids and embrace them tightly witha sigh of relief. I smile at them. “And awe.” A Biotic attempts to throw a punch, I duck at the perfect time. I block its hits with my arm, I manage to grab it as I punch off its mask, its disgusting face becoming revealed as it screams an alien-like scream in my face. I silence it with a Subatomic Sensor mine, planting it in its chestplace and throwing it back, and turning away before I can see its limps spurt out of the orange glow of an explosion.

As I walk towards the family, I pick up the kid’s skeleton toy. “Hey kid, I think you dropped this.” I say gruffy as I give the little boy, who is looking up to me in awe, his toy back. “You’re safe now.” I say with a nod of my head. But I frown. “Can’t say the same for the rest of humanity.” The other child, a teenage girl, looks up at me with big, glistening eyes. “Who are you?” she asks in awe.

I stand straight and proud, but no smirk on my face, I lift my head. “I’m Future Man.” I tell her.

The father looks at me, I expect him to thank me and– “Joshy.” I pause. What? No. That’s not my name. “No.” I correct. “I’m Future Man.” I say with a little bit of agitation, admittedly I could be a little less harsh. But it’s starting to get on my nerves now. “Joshy!” says the teenage girl.

“Future. Man.” I correct again.

“Joshy?” says the little boy I gave the toy back to. I huff impatiently. How could they not understand? I look to my left and put my hands on my hips. Joshy is a name I haven’t been called in many years. Not since my parents were killed by the—

“Joshy!” my dad whispers. And I wake up. I sigh. “Dad. You don’t have to wake me up, okay? I have an alarm clock.” I grumble, keeping my head to the pillow, I know my bed hair is all over the place, and I don’t really want to look right now. My Dad smiles. “Yeah, but not one that makes you pancakes!” he exclaims. He taps the bed. “Come on, you little buddy boo!” Ugh. How I hate that nickname. I’m not a kid. I sigh heavily as I yank the bedsheets off of me. “I’m an adult! You don’t have to make me pancakes!” I watch my Dad leave without another word, and I sit up, getting out of bed, I step on something and it cracks. I look down and see it. Snapped in half. I pick up one half.

“My joystick!”

FUTURE MAN BUT IF IT WAS A BOOK?!?!

hope you enjoyed and lmk if you want me to keep posting this ^^ it was honestly just a little thought I had but I just wanted to share it!!! okay byeee!!!

10 months ago
Thank You @minholovr And Everyone Who Got Me To 100 Reblogs!

Thank you @minholovr and everyone who got me to 100 reblogs!

No Lube, No Protection, All Night, All Day, From The Kitchen Floor To The Toilet Seat, From The Dining
No Lube, No Protection, All Night, All Day, From The Kitchen Floor To The Toilet Seat, From The Dining
No Lube, No Protection, All Night, All Day, From The Kitchen Floor To The Toilet Seat, From The Dining
No Lube, No Protection, All Night, All Day, From The Kitchen Floor To The Toilet Seat, From The Dining

no lube, no protection, all night, all day, from the kitchen floor to the toilet seat, from the dining table to the bedroom, from the bathroom sink to the shower, from the front porch to the balcony, vertically, horizontally, quadratic, exponential, logarithmic, while I gasp for air, scream and see the light, missionary, cowgirl, reverse cowgirl, doggy, backwards, sideways, upside down, on the floor, in the bed, on the couch, on a chair, being carried against the wall, outside, in a train, on a plane, in the car, on a motorcycle, in the bed of a truck, on a trampoline, in a bounce house, in the pool, bent over, in the basement, against the window, have the most toe curling, back arching, leg shaking, dick throbbing, fist clenching, ear ringing, mouth drooling, ass clenching, nose sniffling, eye watering, eye rolling, hip thrusting, earthquaking, sheet gripping, knuckles cracking, jaw dropping, hair pulling, teeth jitterbug, mind blogging, soul snatching, overstimulating, vile, sloppy,moan inducing, heart wrenching, spine tingling, back breaking, atrocious,gushy, creamy, beastly, lip biting, gravity defying, nail biting, sweaty, feet kicking, mind blowing, body shivering, orgasmic, bone breaking, world ending, black hole creating, universe destroying, devious, scrumptious, amazing, delightful, delectable, unbelievable, body numbing, bark worthy, can't walk, head nodding, soul evaporating, volcano erupting, sweat rolling, voice cracking, trembling, sheets soaked, hair drenched, flabbergasting, lip locking, skin peeling, eyelash removing, eye widening, pussy popping, nail scratching, back cuts, spectacular, brain cell desolving, hair ripping, show stopping, magnificent, unique, extraordinary, splendid, phenomenal, mouth foaming, heavenly, awakening, devils tango ever bro could cause a nuclear bomb inside me and i’d still ride.


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9 months ago

Lafayette

funniest Kamala Harris VP picks go

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briefkittenearthquake - screw single and ready to mingle. i'm bi and ready to die
screw single and ready to mingle. i'm bi and ready to die

call me ari, she/her, bi, not so proud american, MINOR, mclaren fan

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