"When He Was In England, He Had To Sword-fight Some Dude For Looking At His Ass" -11/14

"Sarah was my first sugar mommy, Sarah's my sugar mommy and I love her." - 9/15

"Uh yeah, he was eating my ass"-9/29

"What is this fascination with Ohio, it's an undeserved reputation" - 11/13

"I'm not gonna give you 5 bucks to get with my sister bro" -10/24

Unhinged quotes from my highschool's production of Adams Family with little to no context:

"I'm not gay I'm just freaky" -ensemble member

"I'm so gay for Lucas" -same ensemble member like a minute later

"I know we are all yappers at heart" - stage manager

"dont agitate the grog" -assistant stage manager when stage manager almost spilled the caffeine drink

"it adds to the flavor" - manager when she found a hair in the drink pot

"it's almost furry time :(" my stage manager's notes

"I don't like to be mean" -my director

"get it grandma!" -someone backstage

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"She aint no girl if she won't put it in your cock"- 9/19

"yk that boulder in Indiana Jones? That's me!" - 5/15

"You wanna gobble me up, Grady?" -11/15

"You're either pregnant or not pregnant, there's no inbetween" - 8/23

"We gotta scadoodle scadattle" -8/8