God: How Fancy Do You Wanna Be?

Poop, poor consulting detective... Want me to bite and poison the stairs for you, @consult-sherlockholmes? 🕷️❤️🥰😘😍😌😁😉☺️🥲😳😅😭✨👉🏻👈🏻

And thank you for taking care of Sherlock for me, @consult-johnhwatson! 🕷️❤️🥰😘😍😌😁😉☺️🥳🥺🥹💯✨😭👈🏻

In case anyone claims I fell down the stairs, no I did not fall down the stairs. There is no evidence for that. I am much too agile and have too fast reflexes to do such a simple mistake as slip on the stairs.

I'd switch with Mycroft, because I'm fat he's got a suit of armor.

❔ 🔁 ❔

*sisterhood of the traveling pants rules apply - anything you swap will fit, no matter your body type

Want more? Join the Tag List Tagged: @aphroditesdilemma , @and-make-it-double, @enterthetadpole, @starkraivennemad , @chriscalledmesweetie , @consultjohnwatson , @tujhse-raabta

That means I get to bully the pink toad called UmBITCH!

Do you also do match ups or only fanfics?

Do you mean match ups between readers and characters or two characters? Either way, I'll admit I'm not familiar with this, but why not!

*suddenly wonders if they know enough characters to do that and keep it varied*

Not Halloween-y but could you write about the slender brothers purring around their s/o for the first time?

 Slender

Just come into his office when he’s in a good mood and start loving on him.

You’re bound to get a purr soon or later if the environment is right.

Some long and loving touches and slow kisses will prompt his purring.

You pause from the sudden static rumble from your boyfriend’s throat.

You’ve never heard it before, but by the way he leans into you, he seems to be enjoying himself.

Slender will lean his head into your side as you massage his temples as a deep, gravelly purr with a whisper of static rumbles from his throat.

You allow him to stay like that for a calming break, before being coaxed on his lap to retrieve even more purrs from your boyfriend.

Offender

As everyone knows, Offender is a very loving person.

He can usually create a short-lived purr on command, but there are times where he surprises himself before falling asleep while cradling his s/o.

It’d have to be a quiet night where Offender can get lost in his thoughts thinking about his s/o, and how much time and love he’s spent with them.

You’ll be shifted awake by a mass of muscle scooting closer to you, along with a gaining purr in volume.

Offender has a loud purr, so you won’t be getting much sleep tonight.

You were aware of his purring since he mentioned it in passing, but you couldn’t imagine it’d keep you awake.

But the lopsided smirk he’s sporting will never spark disgruntlement.

You just hold him closer and leave butterfly kisses along his cheeks in content.

Trender

It will take a while into the relationship for Trender to purr around his s/o.

He doesn’t purr often, and there’s rarely moments long enough for it to be prompted.

Everything has to be perfect to hear his cute raspy purr.

It was a long day at work, and he was dead on his feet from slaving over another ballgown for a rich party for rich people who seemed to all request his clothing at once.

Trender fell into your arms, and didn’t even bother to take his shoes off before hand.

All he knew that night was cuddling up to his s/o’s chest and taking a very long nap in their arms.

There isn’t much else to it besides tracing your touch along his skin and keeping Trender relaxed in your hold for a good nights sleep.

He wouldn’t even know he was purring until his s/o mentioned it the next morning.

Splendor

The first time hearing him purr would be the first time you cuddle..

Splendor purrs easily, and it can surface whenever he’s in close contact with you, whether it be a cuddle or a long hug.

And Splendor is a huge cuddle bug, he’ll hop onto any given chance to snuggle up under a blanket.

And just after a few minutes, Splendor was putty in your arms.

He’s just so peaceful and content and cute, your heart just can’t handle it.

Press a few kisses to his cheeks and he’ll be glowing.

The high-pitched sound surprised you at first, and before you could ask if he was alright, he buried his freckled cheeks into the crook of your neck.

Splendor was content, and even though your heart was racing, you kept still and enjoyed the solitude.

LITERALLY me when talking about spiders.

POV you made a popular post about insects

*Holds up your police badge* Here it is, officer! 🕷️❤️🥰😘😍☺️😁😉😌🤣😂😋🥳💯👀✨👉🏻👈🏻

Hey Greg! Did you know that big dragonflies can speed up to 130 miles per hour??? Cheetah's can also speed up to 130 miles per hour, but only for about 20 seconds, so a big dragonfly can easily beat a cheetah in a race!

Dragonflies can also make it from Lybia to Iceland in only four days flat! Awesome, isn't it?! 🕷️❤️🥰😘😍☺️😁😉😌🥳👀💯👉🏻👈🏻

Is this true? I don't know any bugs to confirm these facts with. Feel like I'd need a detective for this. Or someone who really knew bugs. Wonder if I know anyone like that...

Slender Brother Headcanons

-They are German(Because the first ever ‘picture’ of Slenderman was taken in Germany). Just imagine Slenderman going off on long tangents in German when angry. -Splenderman insists on monthly picnics/outings in human form. The other three aren’t crazy about them because they’re busy and Offender thinks he’s too macho and cool but they all go anyway because they cannot say no to Splender. Mostly because Splender is bloody terrifying when mad. -Trender and Offender are twins. -Splender loves Death Metal. It pretty much shocked the living fuckery out of Offender and Trender when they walked in and discovered Splender listening to it really loud through his earplugs. Slender was just calmly-and smugly-knitting in the armchair next to him. -As different as they all are, they care about each other AND IF ANYONE TOUCHES SPLENDER THEY DIE. -Trender likes to dress the other three up. -Slender and Offender love Disney and get together weekly to watch some. Trender and Splender are just nice enough to keep their secret. (Slenders favourite is Cinderella and Offenders is Tangled) -Whenever anybody tries to bully Trender, they expect the other three Slenders to get angry but quickly find out that Trender does NOT need protection… -Only Slender is allowed Proxies. The other three would be way too stressful… -Slender. Mansion. Prank Wars. (Imagine with me, Jeff hiding under the house with a bucket over his head because Trender threw Slenders tea in a harbour somewhere and Splender made condom balloons and L.J PLEASE COME QUICK SAVE ME) -They often listen to each other’s thoughts. Except Offenders thoughts. No one wants to listen to that. No one.

(I have more! Ok, here we go~) -Most would think that Slender gets along best with Trenderman, no? Because they could both sigh and shake dissaproving heads their silly brothers but nope! Slender gets along best with Offender. They often get together to talk about their victims and Slender usually does very well with holding Offenders leash when they go out and Offender is very good at getting Slender to have a little fun. -Trender is very tolerant of his brother’s antics, so he doesn’t really mind when he goes out with his siblings and it ends up with Splender covering everything with glitter, Offender having to be restrained and Slender hiding. Mostly because Trender is a very good actor, he just pretends he doesn’t know them. -They are each from a different time(Ignoring the fact that Trender, Offender and Splender are all merrily parodies of Slenderman). -Slender does drugs sometimes(He is a very stressed man, having to make sure none if the other, more reckless Creepypasta’s aren’t caught) -Whenever a Non-Creepypasta guy attempts to hit in or flirt(Innocently or not) with a Creepypasta Girl(Jane, L.Jill, Candy Cane, Clockwork, Judge Angel, Nurse Ann, Sally…ect) Offender hates it and will always put a stop to it(Most girls get angry with him over it because MAYBE THEY WANT A BOYFRIEND or THEY CAN PROTECT THEMSELVES) and he gets absolutely furious when said Non-Creepypasta guy ever tries to hurt one of them…Whether this is because he actually has a soft spot or he see’s them all as his no one knows, they just know that Jane ain’t getting no boyfriend any time soon.

I agree with the bite as I am a person who got bitten by a praying mantis two times (because my idiot ass accidentally spooked the poor creature). But they're very beautiful and unique beings with five eyes!

Praying Mantis

Mantis religiosae

The Praying Mantis can be identified by its typically bright green coloring and long, skinny body. It is commonly found in environments around moist and vegetation-rich areas such as forests and gardens.

Like most mantids, the Praying Mantis is a solitary insect and prefers to hunt alone.

The Praying Mantis is an carnivore and typically feeds on small insects, including flies, moths, spiders and crickets, but has been know to fight (and eat) small animals like, lizards, birds, frogs etc.

Some of its predators are birds, spiders, hornets, and lizards.

Fun fact: Praying mantises have exceptional eyesight and can rotate their heads 180 degrees.

Contrary to popular belief, The Praying Mantis is (currently) not listed as endangered, and is generally beneficial to the environment as it helps control the population of pests.

The Praying Mantis can be known to have parasitic relationships with horsehair worms (praying mantis-host, horsehair worm-parasite)

The stealth movements of the praying mantis have made it a symbol of meditation and contemplation. In China, the insect has long been honored for its mindful movements; It never makes a move unless it is certain that is the right thing to do.

it is not advisable to handle a Praying Mantis without proper training as they have a strong bite and can cause pain to humans if mishandled. However, they are generally not aggressive towards humans and will only defend themselves when provoked.

My person rating: 5/5 ★★★★★

I love mantids, they are extremely unique creatures and are one of my favorite bugs to keep and observe!

(Keep in mind this rating is just my personal opinion, you can feel differently about the praying mantis, There is no correct answer for how to feel about bugs!)

Thanks for reading and happy bug spotting! if you've got any questions or just want to chat bug stuff feel free to comment or dm me!

If i missed something or messed up a fact please comment and correct me!

Credits:

I believe both Dividers are from @strangergraphics-archive

...Did you hurt yourself, Sherly? 🕷️❤️🥰😘😍😌😁✨😳😉☺️🤣😂🥲😋😳👉🏻👈🏻

In case anyone claims I fell down the stairs, no I did not fall down the stairs. There is no evidence for that. I am much too agile and have too fast reflexes to do such a simple mistake as slip on the stairs.

The mayfly man... *Small smile* The mayfly man is... here today. *Let's glass of campagne fall to the floor.* Uh... Sorry, I...

Male small mayfly, Baetinae, Baetidae

Male small mayflies in the family Baetidae differ from females in that they have seven eyes rather than five - 3 simple eyes, 2 compound eyes,and 2 turbinate eyes on top of the head. These upward-facing eyes are thought to be used for spotting females during aerial mating.

Photographed in Malaysia by Nicky Bay // Website // Facebook

Shared with permission; do not remove credit or re-post!