“In A Hundred Years Of Movies, Homosexuality Has Only Rarely Been Depicted On The Screen. When It Did

This is an accurate representation of what Fighter’s single brain cell was going through during this whole thing

Ask a historian, “What was mankind’s greatest invention?” Fire? The wheel? The sword? I would argue it’s history itself. History isn’t fact. It’s narrative, one carefully curated and shaped. Under the pen strokes of the right scribe, a villain becomes a hero, a lie becomes the truth.

-Gaal Dornick, Foundation

um. hello? can I help you?

Khaotung: He's a family member to me. A day without him would be bad. But at present, he's never out of my sight no matter where I look.

Brb, crying about how much they love each other

ETA: longer version of this bit here

The voyage west at the end of Return of the King is extremely funny to me, because just look at who's on board. You've got:

Frodo Baggins, hero of the Shire, in need of healing but also excited to see Valinor and meet the legendary elves who live there, a gentle soul

Elrond Halfelven, as kind as a summer, looking forward to peace west of the sea, probably wants to go chill out in a cottage with his wife for the next thousand years

Which seems fine. And then we get to everyone else.

Gandalf, cheeky bastard who's gotten so used to being a weird old wizard in Middle-Earth that's he's forgotten what Maia are supposed to act like, will immediately cause problems

Bilbo Baggins, noted storyteller, definitely planning to break into Aule's halls to see his dwarf friends, will ask all the elves weird questions and then sing about their lives and deaths in front of them, will immediately cause problems

Galadriel, who came to Aman half for Celebrian and Elrond's sake and half to taunt all her cousins about being the only one of them to survive the First Age, enjoys causing problems, will immediately cause many problems

(Also, to be clear, these are not three isolated problem-causers, they absolutely spent the entire trip to Valinor actively planning to give Amanyar society and the Valar an aneurysm.)

I just love the idea of Elrond, now reunited with Celebrian, and Frodo happily having tea with Elwing and Earendil, with nothing to interrupt them but the gentle sounds of the tides.

Meanwhile Galariel, Bilbo, and Gandalf are collectively bullying Mandos into releasing Maglor Feanorian from the halls because:

Bilbo wants to read him his translation of the Noldolante, which is written as a cheery Hobbit drinking song

Elrond always complained about how Gandalf and Maglor were both insufferably vague about advice and Gandalf needs to make sure he's more infuriating than Maglor as a matter of his wizardly pride

He still owes Galadriel money

I know you’re probably super busy but I HAVE to share this with someone. I found this absolutely insane shirt at my job (thrift store) and it’s been killing me to imagine Silco in it

You can't drop something like this to my askbox and not expect me to draw something

Moms usually drop the kids off to their playdate, time for the dads to meet.

"A-Cheng, come over here."

You know what? Fuck that.

Marshal Commander Fox is entirely unhinged. Batshit crazy. He hides it extremely well under a rock solid mask of professionalism but the second he is out of sight he will be doing something illegal.

If questioned Fox will simply say “Government property can’t break the law” or It’s not murder if I’m not a person”

He commits treason daily and has definitely murdered people.

He faked Fives’ death and regrets it because he and Dogma are too chaotic together. He fakes so many deaths. He got his grubby little hands on an entire squad of commandos somehow.

This headcanon is the ‘prove me wrong’ kind of canon compliant and I will not take criticism.