Vision: Hello

Peter: Tony

Tony: Yes Spidy

Peter: What's an alcoholic

Tony: Well you see those two birds up there, an alcholic would see four.

Peter: Tony there's only one bird up there.

Tony: Fuck!

Peter: Mr. Pool what sexuality are you?

Deadpool: Sexual.

Peter: what???

Deadpool: Sexual.

Bucky: sorry im late i was doing things...

Sam: *out of breath* HE PUSHED ME DOWN THE FUCKING STAIRS!!!!

Bucky: push is such a strong word, i prefer to call it "giving you a little nudge"

Sam: oh I'll give you "a little nudge" WHEN I SHOVE MY FOOT UP YOUR ARSE!

Bucky: HEY! Watch your fucking language infront of the captain

Steve:....

Steve: did you have a good day?

Sam: yes

Bucky: no

Sam: shut up

Steve: a good day ?

Sam: yes

Bucky: no

Sam: shut up

Steve: you're supposed to have taken him to the spa

Sam: i took him to the spa

Bucky: he put me in the vegetable steamer

Sam: it's the same thing!

Steve: it's not the same thing!

Sam: it is too, it gets hot, and it gets steamy, and then it goes ding

Bucky: purple bastard

Sam: maxican condiment

Steve: a condiment?

Bucky: i do not use them

Sam: you dont?

Bucky: and niether did your mother

Game night #1

Tony: Orange, "first to mess up loses a card; hangover helpers." uhhh gatorade

Bruce: a nice breakfast

Valkyrie: hangover? What is this?

Tony: you actually need to stop drinking to get a hangover valkyrie.

Valkyrie: that is lose, lose situation

Sam: bucky and i were crossing the street and this dude drove by and honked at us

Zemo: *sighing* what did he do?

Sam: he chased him to the next red light, then reached into the window and...

Bucky: WHO WANTS A STEERING WHEEL?!

Steve: what do you want to eat?

WinterSoldier: the souls of the innocent

Bucky: a bagel

WinterSoldier: NO!

Bucky: two bagels

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Sam: yell the first word that comes to mind

Y/n: DADDY!!

*bucky: looks at Y/n*

Y/n: i meant bucky