I’m Very Curious As To What This Means For My Life Lol Like… Do I Need To Reevaluate A Few Decisions???

Cody's Best One-Liners

There’s a piece of flimsi tacked to the wall, unassuming in a way that is casually acute and altogether too smug. The letters loop gracefully, but they point at the ends like a lighthearted jab.

Which, naturally, they are, because at the top of the flimsi in Obi-Wan’s dry-humored handwriting is written “Cody’s Best One-Liners.”

Cody never knows whether to laugh or grimace or roll his eyes, but for the life of him he doesn’t have the heart to take it down.

So it grows, an entry popping up every few days with the same amused devotion that plays in the twitches of the Jedi Master’s beard.

“Maybe a cough drop would do it.” And the admirals had glowered, but Obi-Wan hacked out a strangled laugh and suggested that perhaps, indeed, General Grievous could be persuaded to negotiate.

“If you leave them alone they’ll be glued together by the time anyone gets back.” Boil looked affronted, but Waxer had covered giggles behind his hands while Boil’s mask melted. They snorted, identically, and even the shinies had laughed.

“No need to call the demolition crew. Rex’s guys will take care of it.”

“You’re not confused, sir, you’re just wrong.”

“Wolfpack’s late again - I suppose General Koon really is serious about that parental quality time thing….”

“You are not excused from eating your rations unless the Force feeds you, which is exactly what I will do if you don’t.”

Obi-Wan takes great pleasure in adding to it. He saunters up to the flimsi almost lazily, a pen between his fingers, a loose grin coloring his cheeks, and pointedly does not look at Cody when he makes his little expansions. He just smiles, somewhere between stupid and knowing. It’s insufferably affectionate, and it drives Cody half-mad.

It’s safely in their joint apartment, the one the Jedi and the Marshal Commander accidentally share, so it’s not like someone will stumble in to see it. A private joke.

But Obi-Wan’s other great pleasure comes from dropping hints about it. “We ought to write that one down, Commander,” he’ll say, or “how I wish I were inspired enough to make even half of Cody’s quips.”

Most embarrassingly, he introduces them both to the new batch of shinies with “don’t be fooled by Cody’s formidable exterior. Our dear Commander has quite the sense of humor….” which makes Cody glad for his bucket. Wooley excuses himself and steps a safe distance away, where undoubtedly he can laugh without the shinies knowing.

But Cody looks back at it and can’t help feeling warm.

He sits on the tiny couch they share, in the common room between their separate bedrooms. There’s movement on the other side of the thin wall - Obi-Wan must be in the ‘fresher. His datapad is held in his lap; a cup of caf steams on the wobbly end table beside him.

Obi-Wan comes through the door, a cup of warm tea pressed into his palm, and settles next to Cody on the couch. The drink is herbal, subtle, a vaguely floral sweetness. There is something stronger underneath, solid and quietly bright.

“Cassius?” the commander asks, and cants his head towards the mug.

The Jedi hums. “The Mandalorians say it brings good health.”

Cody looks up, a wry smile and raised eyebrows and a soft tease. “I hope so, considering your vendetta against a full night’s sleep.”

Obi-Wan throws his head back and laughs, comfortably surprised. The sound is effortlessly joyful, and Cody wishes for that kind of peace. The general seems to carry it inside of him, as if it is woven into the essence of his flesh, his clothes, his beard, into the crabbed, gentle elegance of his handwriting.

Obi-Wan fumbles for a pen.

*******

212th for 212? More coming soon, hopefully :)

I wrote the beginning of this piece a few weeks ago and ran right into a wall. It took some effort to finish, but I do love this idea. If anyone's seen this post, yeah. I will never get over Cody's dumb f**king banter. Or Cody, in general.

I will, therefore, leave you with an alternate one-liner that *almost* made it in here. Wolfpack's late again - though I would be too if I had to organize a platoon's worth of Father's Day gifts for General Koon.

TBOBF in 3....

2....

1....

taglist: @sexy-rex @artemis98 @handsignals @ladysongmaster @moobrvoobl-moobmoob-oobmpoobroom

Here’s the Operation Olive Branch master spreadsheet ⬇️ easy links to mutual aid providers and a huge list of families in need as well as additional resources for creators who are looking to help as we surpass 200 days of suffering

Google Docs

Operation Olive Branch

NAVIGATION <a href="https://buymeacoffee.com/operationolivebranch">URGENT: Please support our BUYMEACOFFEE for Bahrain Medical Aid and the

Here’s a link to their printable flyer

A human and an alien meet at a single parent's support group. The human is caring for their now deceased partner's child, both aliens. The alien has adopted a human child. They'd planned to adopt the child together with a mate, but were, as humans put it, dumped the day after the adoption went through.

They share soft smiles and gentle looks from across the room at first. Then they bond over the complexities of interspecies families and child-raising over hot drinks like coffee and various kinds of tea. Without realizing it, they sit next to each other in the meetings. The alien's second set of tendrils wrap around the human's hand and arm. They have playdates with their children, and laugh as the two invent their own secret language, a combination of all the cosmic languages they know, and some they just made up.

One day, the two children run up to their parents. The human child is holding a ring made of grass and twigs. The alien child, a crown of wildflowers.

"Let's play wedding!" The human child says. "We'll read the books and you can get married!"

"It'll be official for once!" The alien child says.

The two parents are stunned. The alien parent takes the ring, and looks at the human parent.

"Would you like to?" They ask, their eyes full of hope. "Be my mate?"

The human parent takes the flower crown, the integral part of the culture around bondings in the alien's culture.

"I would love to," they say.

It was sad they had to stop going to the single parent's support group, but all their friends came to the two weddings they had. It was the new beginning they all deserved.

It’s funny how science fiction universes so often treat humans as a boring, default everyman species or even the weakest and dumbest.

I want to see a sci fi universe where we’re actually considered one of the more hideous and terrifying species.

How do we know our saliva and skin oils wouldn’t be ultra-corrosive to most other sapient races? What if we actually have the strongest vocal chords and can paralyze or kill the inhabitants of other worlds just by screaming at them? What if most sentient life in the universe turns out to be vegetable-like and lives in fear of us rare “animal” races who can move so quickly and chew shit up with our teeth?

Like that old story “they’re made of meat,” only we’re scarier.

I’m gonna put this here cause while I don’t have a huge following I know there are people that look at the stuff I have posted or reposted. If you think what the fascist, racist, rapist, carpet bombing, aid destroying, murdering, war criminals of Isnotreal are justified, get the fuck off my page. You wanna reblog this and hate on me go ahead. You’re just ensuring more people see it and more people know what kind of person you are. I’m not brave, I’m not out there risking my livelihood and my life at protests, but I can do this. I can make sure that even a more few people see this and just a few more people can spread it or donate. I’m one voice, but I’m one voice in billions. Together we’re making noise that can’t be ignored.

Hello everybody.

Please share resources and don’t keep silent about Palestine. Dedicate your day for them today. Do not ignore them, do not let their voices go unheard.

Here are some resources you can share around:

daily click

esims for Gaza

call for a ceasefire

donate feminine hygiene kits

learn about Palestine

Education, sources, donations

Shut it down for Palestine

Please do not ignore this post, share as much information and resources as you can for Palestine.

212TH ONE-SHOT

@metalhusbands :one of the clones gets stuck in a vent - chaos insues

As you wish!!!!

(got the idea from @212th-chaos and @obiwanshusband tooka chaos)

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"What do you mean it's IN the vent?!?!" Cody practically yelled, throwing his arms up in exaggeration.

Waxer bowed his head, hiding his hands behind his back. "I didn't realize the vent cover was off so it sprinted towards it, I tried to grab it and it bit me and disappeared…"

Cody pinched the bridge of his nose as he let out a drawn-out sigh. "There's a tooka loose in the ven- wait did you say it bit you?"

Waxer shrugged, still hiding his hands. "It's not that bad, sir."

Cody gave him an unbelieving glare. "Nice try. Med bay. Now," He pointed down the hall. "I'll go find someone to help find the damned thing."

Waxer nodded, heading towards the medbay as Cody started towards the barracks.

As the Commander got closer, he could hear laughing and yelling coming from beyond the door to the barracks. He wasn't sure what he expected to see beyond the door but he definitely didn't expect what he did find.

"Commander!" Boil shot up from where he was crouched on the floor. Next to him, someone was sticking halfway out of a vent, their waist up hidden inside. Boil looked from Cody to whoever was in the vent, back to Cody.

Cody crossed his arms, trying his best to refrain from laughing. "What the hell happened?"

Around Boil, other troopers were failing to control their laughter. "Well, sir," Boil started, barely containing his own laughter, "Waxer lost a tooka in the vent and Wooley saw it and tried to grab it and well…" he motioned to the pair of legs, "he got stuck."

Cody couldn't stop the amused chuckle as Wooley started to kicked his legs.

"Will you stop karking laughing and get me the kriff out?!?" Wooley's muffled yell only caused the boys to keel over laughing once more.

"I'm assuming pulling him out didn't work, then?" Cody asked, leaning against the door frame.

"We tried," Longshot piped up. "But his squeaking as we tried to pull him out-" he fell into a fit of giggles.

"So what you're saying is you bunch of di'kuts were all laughing too hard to pull him out?" Cody asked, his amused smirk never leaving his face.

"No, yeah. That about sums it up sir," Trapper put in between wheeze.

Cody was more laughing at his troopers trying their best to say things in a professional manner all while doubled over wheezing than Wooley screaming profanities through the vent.

"So," Cody made his way over, lightly kicking Wooley's leg. "How bout you lot get him out of the vent so we can find the missing tooka before it bites someone else?"

"I like that plan!" Wooley called out, kicking his legs again, accidentally hitting Cody in the process.

Unfortunately for Wooley, that just sent them all laughing again. Crys, who hadn't said a word since Cody arrived, was now struggling to breath, curled into a ball on the floor.

"What the kriff did I miss?"

Cody turned to see Waxer now standing in the open doorway, a bandage wrapped neatly around his hand.

Cody leaned his back against the wall, sparing a glance at Wooley. "Seems your tooka caused a bit of chaos in your absence."

Waxer chuckled to himself before walking over to Wooley, grabbing his leg and yanking hard. Wooley slid free from the vent and Waxer landed on his ass, wincing as his bandaged hand hit the floor.

Wooley rolled onto his back, staring at the ceiling before getting up and launching himself at Boil who practically screamed. Wooley wrestled his vod to the floor. "This is for not getting me out, you karking di'kut!" He yelled as he put Boil in a headlock.

No one came to Boil's rescue and he squirmed to attempt to free himself.

Cody didn't move from his spot against the wall, content to watch the chaos unfold.

Wooley released Boil and latched himself to Longshot who started screaming at Crys to help him. Crys was of no help, still fighting to catch his breath.

Waxer stood up, stopping beside his Commander and his vode rolled around on the floor. "Should we-?"

"Nah," Cody interrupted. "They'll figure it out,"

Cody's attention was quickly drawn back to the vent as a soft meow was heard. Beside his foot the tabby tooka, also watching the chaos it had unknowingly caused.

"There's the little shit!" Wooley's voice called out.

"GET IT!"

Tundi sees Jesse: omg you’re here you’re here I’ve missed… I mean… hi. (they hug and cry and all is good)

Pup, sees Thunder: you’re here you came you… stop fussing I’m fine. (Lots of hugs and deep convos and Bumble trying to trip Thunder)

Fox sees his batch: you… came? You’re here? You… you care? (confusion and a little bit of venting then immediate forgiveness and hugs)

Stone, seeing his batchmates: you know what you did… (Boulder does not know but he plans on working it out so he can get his brother back)

Hound, dancing: my batch died 3 whole years ago, doo dah doo dah, but they loved me when they died, do-da-do-da-day

My guy's best moments

Does Narinder need a bath?

So so bad (I lost the plot on this one gays)

For the longest time Narinder refuses to allow anyone to touch him but at the same time suffers mobility issues preventing him from taking care of himself.

Anyway if I keep doing this shit the aromantic council is gonna show up at my doorstep and revoke my right to practice. My demons are winning rn.

After the 30th planet joined the Galactic Union, product manufacturers who wanted to be 'the best' would put their products through planetary tests. However many planets your product could withstand, the better rating it would get. When the 100th planet joined the GU, the Planetary Product Tests started having a yearly ultimate competition which was broadcasted and the results typically heavily affected prices for the upcoming year.

When humanity joined as the 154th planet, humans were coined one of the top three most destructive species, and thus coveted for the PPT. Humans were more than willing to join, and held their own competition to decide who gets to go attempt to destroy these products every year.

Products put in the PPT ranged from small kitchen utensils to new plating for star ships. No product ever survived all 232 planets and their native beings, but some had gotten upwards of 160. Most product designers would recommend which species their product could withstand and then test against those first.

To prepare for the PPT, many companies would hire several humans to continually test their products throughout the year so they knew their end result would be favorable. The label 'Human Tested' soon became a sought after title in shops across the galaxy. Because if something can withstand those crazy deathworlders, then it should be able to handle anything else thrown at it.

Unfortunately, like anything else humans touched in the GU, the PPT soon had to adopt so many rules and regulations that it choked itself out of it's own market, becoming a fake sponsored event with pre decided winners. Individual companies were now in charge of hiring species to test their products before marketing them, and bribes to correct human organizations meant the 'Human Tested' label appeared on subpar products.

Hiring humans also became expensive, and humans quickly became one of the most trafficked commodities among rich companies. Eventually the GU had to step in. With help from Human, Faetatia, and Aureda law makers, a strict set of laws was created that even the most cunning of humans would be hard pressed to get around.

The PPT was disbanded, and testing had to be submitted to the Testing Agency. The Testing Agency created to employ several of every species and was directly overseen by the GU government. Species could only work at the Testing Agency for three years to minimize potential corruption. And if anyone was found trafficking a human, said human would then get ten minutes to exact revenge before whatever remained was then taken to court.

After some time, certain beings (humans) got nostalgic for the PPT and began buying products to host their own version of it. As they gained popularity, companies would donate new products for their PPT.

And the circle of craziness that makes up human history began again while the GU government regretted ever allowing humans to join in the first place.