Probably Someone Has Already Done It, But I Found It Funny

Yk what I find really funny?, the batfamily and danny phantom's crossovers fics, I fr don't know where did it come from, and I haven't give 'em a chance, but in general it's so hilarious this cracked colab lmfaoo

Can I just know,,, why?

dick + damian saying "we were the best"

"we were the best, richard. no matter what anyone thinks." from batman inc (2010) #8

"the heir to the mantle of batman and the original robin come for them. we are still the greatest" from nightwing (2016) #20

"do you really think we could've been batman and robin if i didn't trust you with everything in me?" "we make a good team." "the best." from wayne family adventures #113

"i am the robin to your batman! we were the greatest together, grayson!" from nightwing (2016) #17

hc that there's a gala hosted on Jason's birthday to honour his memory, and every one of the Wayne kids is obviously required to attend. Jason, naturally, can't—being legally dead, and all—so he enjoys his night watching the security cameras with Babs. Popcorn in hand, he amusedly enjoys his siblings try to fumble their way through a whole gala centred around Jason, all while trying to pretend that he's still dead and they didn't talk to him literally a few hours prior.

Tim: Oh, I never got to officially meet Jason before he died, but from what I hear from Dick and Bruce, he was truly a great soul.

Jason, listening to this: He's totally tryin' not to explode 'cause I ate his pistachios earlier.

Babs: Tim likes pistachios?

Jason: Yea. They're his favourite, so I steal them all the time.

Babs, fondly amused: You know Tim's favourite snack?

Jason: Yeah, so I can steal it. Keep up, Barbie.

Babs: Sure.

Socialite: Dear, would you happen to have any stories about young Jason?

Dick, grinning: Absolutely! Just last w—I mean—the last time we went out shopping before he died. Yeah. That. Last time we went shopping he tripped on the escalator. Should've tied his shoelaces.

Jason: That happened last week.

The thing is, Dick has more free reign over answers, since he knew Jason before he died. Tim has a little bit of leeway, since he can chalk up any stories to small interactions he had with Jason as their neighbour. The rest of the kids, though? They have to keep their mouth shut, because if they slip up they'll be questions.

Things are fine until some of the socialites start 'discreetly' badmouthing Jason, saying that there shouldn't be such a big event happening for a glorified street rat. Jason himself isn't really affected by the comments, used to them already. He's pleasantly surprised when he sees every one of his siblings look absolutely livid on his behalf. He sees his siblings shut down every single rumour, even though they logically don't have to—rumours can't hurt the dead, after all. He watches as most of them defend him despite not being able to say anything about actually knowing him, and decides then and there; he has a call to make and paperwork to sign.

Time to defend himself—hanging out with and defending his siblings in public is just a bonus.

I like to think that thanks to Jason's death, Dick's hair became straighter and let it grew bacause he couldn't care less. He was trying to be a good brother to Tim tho, and Timmy was trying to also be a good brother but you know, he was doing the best a little kid could know.

obsessed with like, Jason who absolutely refuses to reconcile with the bats. he wants no part in that family and will not talk to them under any circumstances. but he's legally dead with no friends and sometimes he gets sick of being completely by himself and wants to have company. so.

Bruce: hey Alfred have you seen my-

*comes into kitchen to see Alfred calmly preparing dinner while Jason Todd, Killer Red Hood, silently does paperwork while sat on the corner of the kitchen counter*

Bruce:

Bruce: uh-

Tim, doing homework at the table: don't mention it. if you acknowledge him he'll leave. he just likes being around people sometimes.

the bats have to start treating him like a stray cat, letting him go to them and acting completely unbothered by his presence because if they even make eye contact with Jason he'll jump out the window and they 1. won't see him for a month and 2. will start to see a lot more murders cropping up around gotham.

eventually it gets to the point where Dick will come to dinner to see the rest of the family wordlessly ignoring the brick shithouse of a man who is just sat on the floor of the dining area reading a book and he has to just. take a breath and pretend Jason isn't there. calmly stepping around him without acknowledging him. Alfred will silently place a plate of food by the guys elbow while speaking to Damian about school. When they decide to move from the table to the tv room for a movie night none of them can even look around when they hear him eventually follow just to sit in the corner of this room instead.

Bruce: I'm concerned, this is abnormal for Jason. what if he's been drugged with something? or he's trying to gain sensitive information?

Damian: actually he used to do this a lot after he came out of the Lazarus pit. he liked to sit in and watch me train, and occasionally we'd find him sat by grandfathers feet while he ran meetings. Mother says it's important to let him settle, because it's likely that he's simply craving human intimacy on his own terms for once.

Bruce, crying: oh

Jason still refuses to say a word to any of them unless it's in costume, and even then it's the same old 'i'm not your son! i'm not one of you! fuck off!' shtick like normal. they just have to accept him sneaking into the house every now and then too.

one time Tim needs Red Hoods info on a case he's working and since Jason's been sat on the floor against the wall of the bat cave for the past 45 minutes just. staring into space and vibing. he risks sliding the file across the floor towards him before pointedly turning back to the batcomputer, the info he needs marked clearly. five minutes later it's wordlessly slid back, info filled out and Jason refusing to acknowledge Tim's existence again. it's the only way he'll communicate with them.

after a while it gets to the point where Jason will straight up go to bludhaven and break into Dicks apartment just to silently sit in the corner of the room and Be Around A Familiar Person. Tim comes back from his lunch brake at WE to find him sat on the edge of his desk, working through a case. They work in silence for the rest of the day and when Tim leaves Jason just follows. They get a batburger together but the second Tim slips up and asks how his day was he's off like a shot. Damian regularly eats lunch at school on the roof while Jason plays mario kart on a DSI next to him. Batman will be 4 hours into a solo stake out when civilian Jason will silently slide up next to him with a crossword. they never talk. Jason still makes it clear that he's pissed at Bruce. Bruce doesn't know what else to do but let him be and hope eventually, with enough time, things will progress even further.

Dick, whispering so Jason won't pick up on the fact that he's being perceived: are you sure this is normal

Damian: is anything about any of us normal

Tim: he's got a point. at least we know Jason's watching us. I did this shit all the time before I was Robin, and none of you ever noticed me.

Dick:

Tim: sometimes its comforting to be in the same room as people you're familiar with, even if you can't handle interacting with them.

Dick, crying: ok

hc that jason todd has an instagram/youtube/tiktok account called gatsbyreviews (named after jay gatsby) where he posts reviews of various fictional media (mostly books). thing is, he always gives the reviews in the tone of a pissed-off drill sergeant explaining something for the third time to a particularly bone-headed group of rookies. so even when the review is positive, he sounds like he's passionately defending it in court. he does all his videos in a hoodie and sunglasses, so his identity isn't clear (especially since any viewers who could have recognized him somehow would know he's, y'know, dead) but the visible scars on the lower half of his face are an endless source of intrigue to people in the comments. someone once asked how tall he was, and he responded with a video of him silently stacking up books until the pile matched his height, then standing next to the pile for several seconds before playing jenga with it and eventually knocking it over, as jenga usually ends up going. another youtuber uses the books to find jason's height (the guy in question is real, his name is shane fanx and he's known as the asian height guy) and when it's revealed that he's fucking 6'3 all his viewers start losing their minds. they talk more than ever about this massive, scarred man with the biteable thighs and passion for literature. he gains thousands of followers overnight, people are thirsting in his comments, and jason's just like "hey wtf have i gotten myself into"

on the bright side, he stops thinking he's the ugliest member of the family. after all, when hundreds or thousands of random people on the internet are thirsting over you without seeing your full face, it's hard to keep thinking you're hideous.

Old meme lol

How small must the world be for both Bruce and Tim to witness John and Mary Grayson's deaths

Or for 10-year-old Duke to crack the Riddler's puzzle before Batman swoops in and saves the day, long before his powers came into play

Or for Sheila Haywood to leave her son only to end up assisting his killer a decade and a half later

Not to mention the popular fanon concept of Jason knowing baby Damian in the League of Assassins

Now imagine how many other invisible strings could've tied them together

Like what if Tim and Jason went to the same school when Jason was Robin but all they shared was the occasional bump and "excuse me" in the busy halls

Or what if Babs was a tutor and helped an elementary-aged Steph finally understand her homework only for the Browns to cancel after a couple sessions because they couldn't afford it

What if the first person to buy Cass a hot meal was Kate on one of her travels

What if Alfred witnessed young Selina shoplifting groceries but chose to turn a blind eye

What if Jason lived on the same streets as the Row siblings and gave little Harper tips on how to use tools and defend her brother

What if Steph and Duke shared the same school bus, only he sat in the front while she was toward the back

What if the first person to teach Tim how to tie his shoes was Bruce at a gala because Jack and Janet were busy talking to someone important

What if Bette did a DNA test for fun and found a connection in Nanda Parbat but just assumed the results was faulty because she knew her whole family, right?

What if 8-year-old Dick, the day before his parents died, stayed at a cheap hotel near Crime Alley and found 4-year-old Jason wandering alone and said, "I'll be your big brother for tonight"

What if the universe knew they were made for each other and wouldn't rest until they realized it too

I'm so obsessed w Ijin, I don't get why if d webtoon community is so big there are hardly any type of fan content

The worst part is that this is actually true xD