Geology Core For Real ! A Little Retrospective On My September And October! And Some Sneaky Pics Of The

Hello 👋 can we request our own OCs?

Hello ! Nice to see new people in here !

To answer your question and make it public : YES ! You can absolutely request your own OCs but...

Remember the quality of a request is lesser than one of a comission and the time I will take to make and complete the piece will be completely random ! It can take a long while !

With that disclaimer out of the way, it will realistically, at worse, take up to three weeks but I will keep you updated during the whole process! You can always ask me question during the whole process !

Pilot part 4

Today was a rough day, I’m starting to think I’m just not meant to success. I had a test in italian and d*** ! I think I will have a 9/40 and I still believe I’m generous. There’s a thing with the teacher… I can’t stand her, her voice and how she act it’s like she was screaming “I’M AN HYPOCRITICAL !!!”, she sound fake and selfish, she just don’t care about teaching us anything and if you don’t understand it’s limit if she don’t insult you. I’m still trying my best but I feel like I’m unconsciously giving up a little more every times I go to her class.

Apart of that the day was really boring, like if I haven’t left for two weeks and only came back, the teachers, the lesson, the rythme, everything was so natural and yet so strange… 

I thought coming back would help me to quit this feeling of emptiness and loneliness but it didn’t work for long. I think I need a HUG from a friend, or at least an entire day to speak with them without being interrupted ! 

I need an exit door, I feel like starting a Kickstarter to raise enough money to be sure I have anything I need to open a portal to an other dimension. Maybe I will throw myself inside or maybe I will just watch things come from it and ruining everything. No I love you too much Earth to destroy you ! I will only open it and then close it as soon as I’m on the other side.

Should I try ? Ridiculous it wont work… unless ? No, I don’t think it will ever work so it don’t hurt to try, no ? I’ll try to find information about that, just for the joke and the science of course !

I want to draw space related stuff but I have to draw real things for my art class, raaaah ! I am never free ! 

I will stop complaining here, this one is shorter than the others but I don’t think I have anything else to say for today. Have a good day !

This has nothing to do with my book but hell yeah ! COLOURS !!!!! Somehow it takes a lot of time to draw something like that, like 3hours or something.

It's about how the universe always finds a way to exist despite destruction and that betrayal can only exist if there is love, and that loosing hope is the same as a betrayal and that inherently we all love ourselves just a bit because if we didn't we could not even be desperate

It's about breaking the narrative and finally accepting that love is necessary to exist and that your life is not a given but a gamble

And that ultimately, there is always calm, even in an ongoing explosion, because the universe refuse to not love itself and since you are a part of it so do you

Today I wrote a poem, there is no to a little rhymes but in a way it is one of the most beautiful I wrote.

It's a thousand or so words and it's about hope.

The bench at the edge of the universe.

I sat there. Silently. I said nothing when he sat next to me. We just stared in silence at what was in front of us. How should I describe that ? Light was a liquid, a see of stars and supernovae. Blindingly bright yet soothing to look at. It shifted like gentle wave under the breeze. I witnessed with my own two eyes the universe unfold all its mysteries. I watched in awe as the big bang happened again. We sat there witnessing the reinvention of time, of matter, of gravity, of life. It expanded until it broke and folded on itself until it vanished from existence and once again exploded into this incredible ocean of possibilities.

From the silence came his voice. "Why are you here?" He asked, and suddenly I heard the universe sing

"I do not know" I answered

"It's alright "

"Why are you here?" I asked

"Because the burden of life sometimes gets to heavy for my to lift it"

"So you come here to rest?"

"I am always here, it's just that sometimes I take a tangible form"

"Wouldn't it be heavier that way?"

"No. You humans do not carry this burden. I feel light when I am you"

"I do not feel so light when I am awake"

"Well come back here anytime you need then. You'll always exist here. You just need to remember it"

How did you discover you were a kingfisher?

Okay, that might sound a bit weird but even now I am questioning whether I truly am a Kingfisher.

I knew it was a bird because of small shifts and some habits of mine that can be interpreted as kin related. But that was step one.

Then (when I realised it was most probably therian related) I tried different types of birds : small birds or bigger ones, predator or not. So the steps were something like : "okay so I might be a hummingbird wait no more like a Pelican, no that's too big, oh ! Maybe it's an hawk !"

(To this day I still think that my theriotype is hawk (or related) and kingfisher)

Then I picked up a book about birds and looked at all of them, and did some research, then gave up.

A month later, I was chilling on my sofa, watching a documentary on the science chanel (as you do) and then a Kingfisher came on screen and as the voice was describing their habits and their habitat I was left wondering.

Am I just empathising with this bird in a "haha" way or am I empathising with them because not only we have a lot in common but because I have a sense of "kinship" towards them?

I picked up this idea and took it to my computer and resumed my researches.

There it was, small bird that lives near the water and who fish. Sounds like my dream life honestly.

But more seriously, it was trials and errors (I am still questioning my theriotype) and I feel comfortable with this identity but maybe that is just because I haven't found the exact bird yet. It takes time and I won't lie I was tempted to just give up and never acknowledge my needs and yearnings. But not only does it make sense (for the bird therian situation) but it also feels good to finally put explanations and names on quirks that you could never understand before.

I don't know if that is a satisfactory answer to your question but I found it nice to write about it fir you anon ! Have a great day and a merry Christmas or Hanukkah or any holiday you might celebrate!

Pilote part 2

I didn’t wanted to go back to school naturally but i knew I couldn’t runaway so packed my stuff and leave the house. It’s not like I dislike school in general but the only reason why I’m still going in class is that I don’t want to leave my friends and disappoint my parents. My friends are awesome, I missed them during break, they are so cool ! 

Léandre is the horror film fan, Lise is the pansexual meme lord with Ladia her best friend (she is strange but we love her equally as the others), Johan is the punk, sweet psycho that just look like a fan of Kurt Cobain, Katerina is the quiet girl that come from a other country but she’s great and have the same passion as Jo, Cassandre is the friend that seems to be quiet but is not and Nora is the mom friend. 

I, on the other hand is the conflicting child : pansexual, asexual genderfluid disaster with oblivious parents, with social anxiety but who is loud and make friends easily ( I’m sure I was supposed to be an extrovert but they messed up at last second), scared of what could hide in the shadows but loves being in the dark cuz find it calm and “safe”, I’m the cliché of a disaster teen.

I’m sure you wonder why I’m telling you that, well I don’t know I’ll find out why eventually, but for the moment let’s just continue to tell you my stupid story.

I miss the old blessed time were I was young and had no worries, when we didn’t care about gender, colors or sexual orientation, because we didn’t knew those were things. I remember friends that I make when I was abroad when I was young, I wont see them again but I cherish all the good memories I have. May you to have memories such a these to keep in your heart for the bad days who comes to everyone at one point or an other.

Now all that they care about is popularity, the physical appearance and the rumors. I tried to live like that but damn! it’s so much more complicated than I was expected ! Living like you are really is easier and for ounce I chose the easiest option. I wasn’t able to keep on lying because as an empath that made me feel sick. I know I sound like an arsehole but please don’t hate me for that… 

Thinking of making a weekly post about astrophysics and/or math and other subjects.

I'm in a science club in Uni and the people they bring are extremely knowledgeable and since they gave me their approval I'm thinking of publishing some of it here !

Here it is !! (albeit really late ) Linda from Samba de Amigo and Linda from Rio (2011).

I hope you like it @sambadewinx !

Pilote part 1

Sadly I didn’t knew how to escape my life. all I wanted was to have time for me to take care of myself, be able to go on a long walk on the sea coast, in the park… my life wasn’t complicated, it was the opposite, my life was boring af. Get up, go to school, don’t stop working, stay awake late you have Homework, stay concentrate on your lessons, don’t complain… Welcome in high school !

i was to young to just go outside when I was feeling like going swimming or just ride away on my bike. For me everything felt boring : school ? boring, weekend ? boring, summer ? boring, automne, winter, spring ? BoRIng ! LIFE ? BORING !!!

I couldn’t stay enough concentrate to read or draw, even music and video games were on the edge ! I felt like I was going to explode into tears and cry, scream and punch the wall or my italian teacher’s face, break my phone with my bare hands, running away from my house and my family, climb on the rooftop and live there all at the same time.

On the halloween break I realise that I will never have time for me because life those days is about earning as much as you can and if I had to explain life quickly I would say : when you are 3 and until you are 18 you have to go to school to learn the basics then you can go for more years of school to obtain one or more degrees on speciality. now you have to find a job and work as hard as you can because you need money to live, you will work until you are to old to continu and now you have to survive with the money you have left until the day you die. when I will die on the “game over” screen i will see “congratulation you are dead and you waste your time ! Yay !”.

I know I sound so cynical but, hey, that’s sadly true.