Dick walking into the batcave, with clenched fists
Dick under his breath: I love my family I love my family I love my family I love my family
Tim and Damian standing awkwardly next to each other
Tim: sooo don’t be mad
Dick: I scheduled this day of 2 and a half years ago, you know what it’s like scheduling a day off 2 and a half years before you take it?? I had raven check auspicious calendar dates??
Damian: couldn’t? You have taken one earlier
Dick pulling an a5, 500 page notebook miraculously out his suit: hmm let’s see why didn’t I think of that? Maybe it’s because I’m booked and busy every day of my life? My Google calendar looks like lights flashing at a rave.
Dick: so you have 25 mins, before I call Kori to pick me up if it takes longer than that call Clark or Jason
Tim: well.. that’s kinda the problem
Dick: 24 mins
Tim: wha- that wasn’t a minute
Dick: give me the cliff notes or i make it 10 mins
Tim very quickly: redhood and Superman have both been mindcontrolled but no one knew about Jason being also brainwashed so Bruce thought he fell off the wagon and is torturing Superman and is going after Jason right now and he won’t answer any communications from us and has barricaded us inside the house if you come in you can’t leave and we really don’t know what to do here because Bruce probably won’t believe us
Damian: also Alfred is on vacation and you’re the only one allowed to cook in his kitchen so if we are all trapped here I’d rather like to eat something that isn’t one of Timothy’s creations
Tim: okay boiling the pasta in 2 cans of monster was a THOUGHT experiment I didn’t eat it
Damian: I SAW YOU EATINF IT
tim: ONE TIME TO TEST MY THEORY
Damian: WHAT POSSIBLE THEORY COULD YOU BE TESTING
TIM: WHETHER MONSTER ENEGRY COOKS PASTA ARE YOU LISTENING? UOU GOTTA TRY IT FOR QUALITY CONTRO-
Dick: shut up! Both of you. If I get you out of the house and help you taken all of them down, none of you can call me until the world is ending or someone is dying…
Tim: deal
Damian: I suppose
Dicks starts a tradition, for every first birthday one of his loved ones spends with him, he gives them a part of his heart.
Jason: Dick isn't there for Jasons first birthday at the manor because well... he isn't exactly welcome at the manor but he snuck Jason his number weeks in advance to make sure Jay would be at his crappy apartment the day after his birthday. And he gives Jason a collection of poetry his mother had written while they had traveled around the world. He had memorised all of them many years ago but he wanted to give Jason something tangible to connect them together. He might not be related to Bruce, he might not be Jason's brother by law or blood but Jason carries the robin name and Mary Graysons words so he is Dick's brother no matter what Bruce wants to say about it. Some of the poems aren't in English but they all flow beautifully and are written in the same black swirling script. Jason cries real tears and clings to Dick because this isn't something he can say he's had before. When Jason died, Dick took it from Jays room because he didn't allow it to be part of a mausoleum for his brother he wasn't going to let it be part of one for his brother.
After Jason comes back to life, and he's left Gotham he finds that familiar notebook in a safe-house he was sure Nightwing didn't know about with a post-it note on top reading.
I'm so glad you're back little wing
-DG
Tim: Dick and Alfred celebrate Tims birthday alone and Dick knows that Tim is struggling with who he is and his place in the family. Jason needed connection Tim needed purpose. Tim needed something to do to prove his value so on Tim's 13th birthday Dick teaches him the quadruple summersault. he teaches Tim the Full-Twisting Shaposhnikova his mother's favourite move on the bars and the moors. They spend all day practicing together until Tim can do a loose approximation of as many of his parent's signature moves as they can squeeze into one day. And every time Dick sees Tim for the next two months he asks for a spotter and they spend two odd hours practicing the moves. Tim never ends up incorporating the Flying Grayson's moves into his fighting style but he starts to follow Dicks habit of getting up high when he's stressed and working out all his frustration by practicing those moves over and over again until his body is pleasantly sore. Sometimes when Dick is on undercover missions, Tim will do one of the routines to help with the fact he cant reach his brother.
Damian: canonically Dick gave Damian a trapeze bar but that was long into his Robin tenure I believe it was after the Lazarus island debacle. So I think that by the. time Damians 11th birthdays rolls around, Dick and Damian have a pretty solid relationship and the first thing Dick would have given Damian was his father's unfinished sketchbook which contained the original designs for the robin costume. This book is Thick and its not like a modern sketchbook no, John Grayson found this leather bound monstrosity in Egypt and paid pennies for it. Its so dense that its filled with about 3 years of drawings and still has more the half of its pages a yellowed blank canvas. Damian, who is naturally talented at art and was encouraged by Dick to try and find non-vigilante methods of enjoyment has already taken up drawing months prior but this gets him to start practicing with fervour. He tries hard to mimic John Grayson's art style before eventually giving up at trying to create identical pieces and just incorporates various techniques the man used. For Dicks birthday that year he gifts him a portrait of his late parents but unlike the ones he's made for the manor, Dick's parents are in motion, with his John Grayson's grin stolen right off his sons face and Mary Grayson's boisterous laugh as she crashed into her husbands side could be heard in the famous cackle of her son.
now I wanted to do Cass or Steph or (maybe even Babs or Kori if I wanted to pivot from family to romance) but I genuinely the girl who has Mary Graysons wedding ring would
Donna Troy: Dick Gave it to her when they were still wonder girl and boy wonder. They were 14 and it was right after they had started the titans, back when it was a kids club more than a hero organisation. It was accompanied with a whispered confession of his identity, an identity the rest of their team wouldn't learn for another to 2 years. She wears it around her neck with a simple gold chain. She didn't take it off during her wedding or funeral, she was buried in it and came back with its barely there weight a comfort against base of her neck.
“average person eats 3 spiders a year” factoid actualy just statistical error. average person eats 0 spiders per year. Spiders Georg, who lives in cave & eats over 10,000 each day, is an outlier adn should not have been counted
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tikram 3anik
allah yes3edkon wa ma tinso inno na7na ma3akon
This art is my proof that no one would canonically notice how bad dicks fashion choices are until Bruce puts discowing in the case bc he rocks every thing he wears
a request i got for older dick grayson in his og robin suit
the reason I hate the "Tim doesn't trust Dick after Damian/spyral/ric" is because they are besties your honour.
Like there's a post going around that I cannot for the life of me find that says Dick is Tims trusted adult and they are so right fr ong.
Because despite what Fanon believes Dick is a pretty chill guy and people take one look at him and go "let me unload my emotional baggage on you"
There's like a very famous panel (that im too lazy to find or remember the name of the run its in okay don't yell at me) where Tim basically goes "soooo my girlfriends pregnant" and Dick nearly falls off the roof.
Tim is calling Dick for the dumbest shit imaginable to the world ending and so are the rest of the batkids.
so I have taken the Canon that Dick knows if not all but most and generalised it to hell.
-------------------------
Jason has been on a team with like 80% of OG titan members
they're having gossip session
Jason in a war zone dodging bullets with his bat travel mug in his hand: And THEN! Kori and Roy shared this look and you know the look they give you when they're judging you for bat reasons and you're like tell me why you're mad I was raised by a crazy person my normal levels are skewed.
Dick in NYC with a blueberry bagel In one hand, his Turkish coffee in another, just finished meeting up with Donna who gave him THAT exact look: No REALLLLL why are they like that, just tell me which one of the creepy traits I internalised as a child is bothering you.
Jason: omg you get it anyway so I grab the bomb and start playing soccer with it because its round and im bored and starfire takes it away like idk what im doing? bro ive been bombed I know how to work with a bomb..
Dick: hmmm and then what happened
Jason: and then.....
--------------------------
Tim: Dickkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkk
Dick: yea Tim
Tim: Kon is being a dick
Dick: oh?
Tim: yeah and its really starting to bother me man
Dick who knows Kon is dead and Tim is either hallucinating or drugged to be more susceptible to manipulation and is already on his way: hmm tell me more babybird whys he upsetting my lil brother
Tim about to tell Dick what is a fever dream bc he contracted pneumonia and is loopy off his ass on painkillers:
---------------------------
steph does this more with babs in the hero scene but its just... so easy and totally gets into the habit of it after Dick is her Batman for a bit and now she uses him as her civilian life therapist
Steph on her way back from campus: and then this bitch looks me up and down and pours her coffee cup down my shirt!
Dick on his way back to blud after decking bruce in the face: hold on hold on hold on she did what??
Steph nodding vigorously even though he can't see her: pulls my whole ass sweater away from my body and pours her peats coffee down my goddamn shirt Dick.
Dick: omg she didnt
Steph still nodding: she DID and then I found out from Jonny who found out from Vivian that someone told her I made out with her boyfriend at Leos house party
Dick who has no idea who any of these people are: wait but you were at Leos for like an hour max last week. we has smoothies after.
StepH: exactly so I had proof that I wasn't there and confronted her and went like. I don't want your crusty ass alt white boy whose favourite 'indie' band is the neighbourhood. I dated Tim fucking Drake the OG crusty ass white boy and I don't do repeats
Dick choking on his coffee:
Steph: anyway we are besties now and planning on getting her boyfriend back because apparently he cheated on her with this drop dead gorgeous girl and im high key a lil complimented she thought we were the same person.
Dick who initially called for casework and is actually so happy one of the people he calls siblings is actually like living a life outside of vigilantism: tell me more
Steph: you sound a little teary
dick: don't worry about it
-------------------------
Damian: Richard
Dick: Damian
Damian: so I might be skipping patrol with father
Dick:? what you love patrol??
Damian: and school
Dick: Dames? what's going on:? is everything okay? you can talk to me
Damian: I am volunteering at a hospital
Dick: kid
Damian: Listen before you sAY anything I know what we do is important but I think I can help in another way and -
Dick had brown parents and was training for the olympics at 8, totally knows what its like to have insane expectations and rebel with a day job: kid kid calm down okay? you wanna be a doctor? is that it?
Damian: well? I dont really know but I just? there has to be another way to help people. besides what we do I mean-
Dick: Alfred left me Thomas waynes journals I initially thought they were to bash your fathers head in when he was being stupid but it seems the old man was looking out for us. Wanna take a stab at your other grandpas legacy when you come over next weekend. I'll tell Bruce we patrolled so you get a few more days off.
Damian: you're the best
Dick now the same age Bruce was when he was adopted, now executing 20 perfect backflips in a row:
Jason, 6 years younger than him with actual magic unable to stand up without joint pain: …what the fuck
Bruce: mhm
Jason: this is so unfair
Bruce: finally we agree on something my boy
Jason tearing up: shut the fuck up
Dick on his hands:
Alfred, grabbing an ice pack: "Honestly Master Bruce, what were you thinking trying to keep up with a ten year old?"
Battinson, impatiently batting away the icepack: "Alfred I'm in my prime--" *all joints crack as he stands up*
Dick, completer of ten back flips in a row: "That didn't sound good."
At first, Hua Cheng mostly gives off the impression of a normal over-protective broody love interest in a romance novel, overly paranoid over anything that might potentially hurt Xie Lian, but then you get to the White Clothed Calamity arc and realize, oh god, oh fuck, that’s actually a completely reasonable response to having to watch someone go through that, he’s actually showing remarkable restraint by allowing Xie Lian to go off and do his own thing as much as he does
Kon: If I was gay, it'd be for Tim or Bart. Tim: If I was gay, it'd be for Bart or Kon. Bart: If I was gay, it'd be for Kon or Tim. Cassie: OH MY FUCKING GOD I HATE YOU ALL
Dick looking for Jason
Dick: Jason?
Dick: Jay?
Jason: *Sitting in the corner of a dark room*
Dick: Ok.
bungus
I write bad Dick Grayson and TMA fanfiction on ao3 follow me @imtired_likerllytiredI literally keep creating and deleting accounts on this hellsite lurker since age 8
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