“average Person Eats 3 Spiders A Year” Factoid Actualy Just Statistical Error. Average Person Eats

(This is all a joke)

I love the Dick is pushing thirty and all the Batkids tease him about it and he’s dramatic. But what’s infinitely funnier is in the Robin story (the one illustrated by piccolo) Dick looks young enough to go undercover as a student in highschool.

Which means that Dick with a little bit of effort can pass for 17-19

Which means Jason ‘drawn like a 40 year old whose doing 20 to life in prison built like a brick shithouse’ Todd

Definitely looks older at 23 than Dick does at 27

And so the boys get their licks in and Dick does his howls moving castle let me lie on a bed dramatically like an 18th century women fainting

Calls Kori like ‘babe be honest am I too old for you, do I need Botox? HAVE YOU SEEN A GRAY HAIR PLEASE’ on speaker in front of the Batkids because honestly it’s a funny joke.

And then they go to a bar

And Dick gets ID checked

At 27

He’s been a hero for 19 years

He just got fucking ID checked at the bar

And then when they get into the bar

Jason gets called sir

And he gets called Dude

Because he looks barley legal apparently

And that’s even fucking worse

How is it everyone can laugh at him for being old and HE DOESNT EVEN GET OLD MAN PERKS.

HE HAS OLD MAN BONES, THEY SOUND LIKE HE NEEDS WD-40 (what do you mean that because of the 23 years of intense acrobatics and the 19 years of punching People, and carpel tunnel inducing precision shut up)

And Jason finds it even funnier until dick desperately asks how old the barkeep thinks he is and the dude goes like “idk 21? Barely”

And Jay laughs until the dude went “yeah I mean you look like a kid whose uncle is taking him here for his first drink”

And Jason cuts the laugh mid HA and goes “excuse me?”

Anyway now Dick if finding it funny again

It stops being funny all together when he’s the only one to get ID’d on Tims 21st birthday

Because Tim is 4’0 (it’s only a 3 INCH HEIGHT DIFFERENCE dICK)

And has baby fat on his cheeks at 21 and he can still pitch his voice into an androgynous or fem voice.

(Tim paid the bar keep to do this, he’s stirring shit)

dick grayson & roy harper + thinking of each other unprompted

outsiders (2003) #6 // arsenal (1996) #2 // action comics (1938) #615 // justice league of america (2006) #2 // green arrow (2001) #32 // batman plus arsenal (1996) // titans (2008) #38 // arsenal (1996) #2, 4 // justice league of america (2006) #11 // nightwing (2016) #26

my bravest knighttt... come hither ..... mmmwah !! ok you are dismissed

I love how severely Jason refuses to differentiate between Bruce and Batman while also refusing to acknowledge that Nightwing and Dick Grayson are the same dude

me holding a gun to a mushroom: tell me the name of god you fungal piece of shit

mushroom: can you feel your heart burning? can you feel the struggle within? the fear within me is beyond anything your soul can make. you cannot kill me in a way that matters

me cocking the gun, tears streaming down my face: I’M NOT FUCKING SCARED OF YOU

Hey do you know a canon summary of Jason’s plotline/ development? Or if you don’t at least what you think his development is? I saw your Damian and Jason being league bros rant and I really liked it. Idk shit about jack that’s canon I just see family vibes in fanfic and my trauma says awooga

Hi hi

Yes yes

Okay so my big issue with the league bros Jay and Dami brotherisms

Is that yes Jaybin was a sweetie (I wouldn’t say he wasn’t reckless or that he was the kindest or nicest Robin bc I think that’s a gross exaggeration but he was a sweetie)

But he just? Wasn’t that? When he came back? He was rightfully angry and violent. He gave into the violent tendencies he had as Robin (which unpopular opinion I think were COMPLETELY JUSTIFIED BTW)

but like? Jay had a bat habit of murdering all his teachers when they were done with him

He killed his goons and low level players in his race to take over the Gotham underbelly and like? Idk he just wasn’t? The current red hood or the past Robin.

Like since I am a dick Grayson stan account I’ll use them to demonstrate.

But Jay and Dicks relationship is awful when he first comes back

-he steals dicks nightwing suit and kills people in it ruining dicks standing and making him a target for more anti-hero ‘vigilantes should be killed’ stuff that was happening at the time

- he killed like 100 people in black gate bc he was like ‘well i wanna kill criminals and here i am surrounded by criminals whatever shall i do’

- then there’s all the WEIRD ASS STUFF he did to Dick and Damian when they were Batman and Robin (stripping them naked and trying to reveal them that way to the world??)

Anyway Jay was a fucking VILLAIN

And then after all this, the reboot happened, they gave Jason a collection of very fucked up and traumatized folks that he couldn’t just murder his way out of

And he like actually had to have dimension and he was moved from being imo one of the most interesting Batman/ batfam villains to being a pretty cool anti hero more in the line with batwoman or like the new Harley Quinn

But he didn’t start out that way

He was a murderer with sociopathic tendencies who remembered what it meant to give a fuck through a lot of shared trauma and experiences and now. His relationship with the bats (I’m talking specifically about the batlings rn like dick, Tim and Damian) is much better

Dick helps him clear his name when he’s accused of murder

Tim and him work together on cases

He’s trying to be there for Damian

And this whole dynamic gave me the ability to watch my precious baby boy beat the shit out of Bruce Wayne during Gotham war (I just love angry Grayson lemme live)

Right

But if you think for a SECOND THAT OG VILLAIN JAY TODD WOULD HAVE BEEN LET AROUND TALIAS BABY??

Not happening

Now a lot of people are gonna be like “oh you’re picking and choosing” or “oh you’re ignoring Talia’s characterization in morrisons and using jays” and yeah I think that Talia’s characterization in dicks Batman run was awful and while I think certain things Jason does in the comic he wouldn’t have done if written by someone else. It 100% is more fitting than the racist nonsense Talia Stan’s had to deal with. 

Anyway I think if you want sweet and fuck brotherisms/siblingisms/ other bat relationships (since you don’t read canon and some of these are lowkey ignored by the fanon i 100% you check out like any fanart/ fanfic of them)

Dick Grayson and any younger Robin is always adorable

Tim and Damian in Gotham war

Jay and Damian in the Robin run

Tim and Duke whenever they’re together

Tim, cass and Steph also have a very fun dynamic (the angst potential here goes crazy tho)

Jay and Dick as red hood and nightwing are very very fun

But also nightwing and Jaybin is fucking adorable (cue dick trying to take Jason Todd from Bruce like YOU FUCK UP IM ADOPTING HIM MYSELF)

Jay and babs (we ignore that one time they tried to make them date we IGNORE IT)

Outside of the Batfam batkid relationships are also so fluffy

Jay and bizzaro have a very cute relationship

Tim and the young justice team are fucking adorable esp him Cassie, Kon and Bart

Supersons can be read as platonic or romantic but they’re fucking adorable and I loved the supersons comic so so so much

Dick and the fab 5 trust me Dick and Donna sibling fluff hurts my teeth.

I personally hated the comic this happened in but if you’re not a big comic fan / you don’t care about pre crisis that Jay and Roy??? Adoptable

Anyway this is mainly based on my opinion I AM mainly a Nightwing reader so some of these things come from my Jay Todd Stan friends (cough cough cough you know who you are cough cough) so I’m sorry if I fucked up any details

Birthdays

Dicks starts a tradition, for every first birthday one of his loved ones spends with him, he gives them a part of his heart.

Jason: Dick isn't there for Jasons first birthday at the manor because well... he isn't exactly welcome at the manor but he snuck Jason his number weeks in advance to make sure Jay would be at his crappy apartment the day after his birthday. And he gives Jason a collection of poetry his mother had written while they had traveled around the world. He had memorised all of them many years ago but he wanted to give Jason something tangible to connect them together. He might not be related to Bruce, he might not be Jason's brother by law or blood but Jason carries the robin name and Mary Graysons words so he is Dick's brother no matter what Bruce wants to say about it. Some of the poems aren't in English but they all flow beautifully and are written in the same black swirling script. Jason cries real tears and clings to Dick because this isn't something he can say he's had before. When Jason died, Dick took it from Jays room because he didn't allow it to be part of a mausoleum for his brother he wasn't going to let it be part of one for his brother.

After Jason comes back to life, and he's left Gotham he finds that familiar notebook in a safe-house he was sure Nightwing didn't know about with a post-it note on top reading.

I'm so glad you're back little wing

-DG

Tim: Dick and Alfred celebrate Tims birthday alone and Dick knows that Tim is struggling with who he is and his place in the family. Jason needed connection Tim needed purpose. Tim needed something to do to prove his value so on Tim's 13th birthday Dick teaches him the quadruple summersault. he teaches Tim the Full-Twisting Shaposhnikova his mother's favourite move on the bars and the moors. They spend all day practicing together until Tim can do a loose approximation of as many of his parent's signature moves as they can squeeze into one day. And every time Dick sees Tim for the next two months he asks for a spotter and they spend two odd hours practicing the moves. Tim never ends up incorporating the Flying Grayson's moves into his fighting style but he starts to follow Dicks habit of getting up high when he's stressed and working out all his frustration by practicing those moves over and over again until his body is pleasantly sore. Sometimes when Dick is on undercover missions, Tim will do one of the routines to help with the fact he cant reach his brother.

Damian: canonically Dick gave Damian a trapeze bar but that was long into his Robin tenure I believe it was after the Lazarus island debacle. So I think that by the. time Damians 11th birthdays rolls around, Dick and Damian have a pretty solid relationship and the first thing Dick would have given Damian was his father's unfinished sketchbook which contained the original designs for the robin costume. This book is Thick and its not like a modern sketchbook no, John Grayson found this leather bound monstrosity in Egypt and paid pennies for it. Its so dense that its filled with about 3 years of drawings and still has more the half of its pages a yellowed blank canvas. Damian, who is naturally talented at art and was encouraged by Dick to try and find non-vigilante methods of enjoyment has already taken up drawing months prior but this gets him to start practicing with fervour. He tries hard to mimic John Grayson's art style before eventually giving up at trying to create identical pieces and just incorporates various techniques the man used. For Dicks birthday that year he gifts him a portrait of his late parents but unlike the ones he's made for the manor, Dick's parents are in motion, with his John Grayson's grin stolen right off his sons face and Mary Grayson's boisterous laugh as she crashed into her husbands side could be heard in the famous cackle of her son.

now I wanted to do Cass or Steph or (maybe even Babs or Kori if I wanted to pivot from family to romance) but I genuinely the girl who has Mary Graysons wedding ring would

Donna Troy: Dick Gave it to her when they were still wonder girl and boy wonder. They were 14 and it was right after they had started the titans, back when it was a kids club more than a hero organisation. It was accompanied with a whispered confession of his identity, an identity the rest of their team wouldn't learn for another to 2 years. She wears it around her neck with a simple gold chain. She didn't take it off during her wedding or funeral, she was buried in it and came back with its barely there weight a comfort against base of her neck.

I’m done ranting about Steph and Damian this is nightwing first account I’m here to thirst over him, his morally ambiguous tall younger brother and his ex-fiancé

That’s my job

Now PAY attention to my girl so I can go back to leering at Dan moras art thank you

Dick Grayson is my favorite lil guy

And my favorite way of consuming content of my favorite lil guy is the core 5 titans

There is also about 5 billion pieces of media where these 5 interact and some of it sucks so here I am scrapbooking canon together with glue and scissors so I can talk about how I view Dicks relationship with the other OG titans and how different these relationships are from one another while all still being boiled down to found family love

Dick & Donna: Listen. To. Me. These two aren't besties, or fav teammates or siblings. These two are the sun and earth revolving around each other except they each think the other one is the Sun. Dick Grayson and Donna Troy are the blueprint for platonic soulmates. Dick and Donna make everyone around them believe in ancient story by plato "humans once had 4 arms and legs and 2 faces and the God Zeus split them in half for their hubris and now they are destined to roam the earth forever looking for their other half". If y'all think Dick wasn't doing well after Jason died?? Donna Troys death fundamentally changed who Dick Grayson was and how he was written in teams for years. Donna Troy and Dick Grayson absolutely have debated getting platonically married (not canon but it is in my heart) and the only reason they haven't is BC if they do, Donna will kidnap Dick and never let him within 1000 feet of Bruce Wayne and Gotham.

Dick & Roy: remember how I said Dick was fucked up post Troias death in the comics? yeah? Roy Harper is the only reason he made it out of that period of his life alive. These two are like fire and Gasoline, they're quick and angry and always inexplicably near each other. They are VICIOUS with one another in a way they almost never are with anyone else. They try so hard to ruin their relationship bc implicitly they know (unless its the new 52 which I ignore for my own mental wellbeing-hey I did say this was a scrap book of canons) they'll always be there for each other. Roy Harper never misses, Dick Grayson cannot fall and yet Dick is there to hold Roy when his hand trembles and Roy is there to catch Dick when he loses his Grip.

Dick Grayson is the first person Roy calls to get Lian

Roy Harper is the designated keep Dick Grayson alive even if he has to tie the bastard up-

Dick (and wally depending on the run) help Roy with his addiction)

these two are each others roman empires

Dick & Wally: to cut back on the pretentious seriousness of this post. Every time these two are drawn together be it 80s road trips or being the most likeable part of tom Taylors run. Wally west always reads like he's about to invite Dick to swing with him and his wife. If you see them as platonic, romantic (right person wrong time is my favourite Fanon flavour but canonically I like em besties) or somewhere in between Wally West is always Dick Graysons best friend. There is something so wholesome about the fact that Wally canonically stalks checks up on Dick Grayson as much as he does his wife and twins and Dick who is a bat, notorious for expressing their love via breaking into your house and doing your casework for you. Is getting stalked checked up on by someone who loves him without it triggering his "see obviously you're not good enough they're literally babysitting you" paranoia. its like meeting your partners love language needs but its for deeply messed up individuals. They canonically call themselves best friends, and while Dick will always love Roy he always Likes being around Wally (as well as love him but that's a given)

(sidetone are you even besties if people don't think you're dating when they meet you?)

Dick & Garth: The amount of trust, love and respect that tempest holds for Nightwing melts my damn heart (but then again everything garth does melts my damn heart, baby Garth you will always be famous) they are such an underrated pairing and I love the fact that no matter the media, whether they're rivals like in the cartoons or Garth deferring to Dick as leader to the point where he disobeys aquaman (rebirth) Bc yeah THATS how much my purple eyed perfect boy trusts wing. There is always this really sweet understanding that Garth can go to Dick for advice (he asks for Donna advice in titans and advice on his relationship with Dolphin in the comics). And him and Dicks reunion post RIC? I love them sm. Its just... There was also a period of time where Garth was the only titan with sense and tbh sometimes its refreshing to see that when the rest of them (except donna she was dead at the time we never say a bad word about donna in this household) are being fucking insane

The pipeline from “I’m indifferent/slightly averse towards this popular ship” to “this ship shows up in every fucking unrelated fanwork and post and now I have a personal grudge against it because it’s so hard to avoid” is surprisingly short