A 6x6 Square Of Crystalbrain
a 6x6 square of crystalbrain
yeth, eye have made enough NFTs 2 cover 35 squares, witch leaves one square to put my name in (it's in teh bottom right and says "crystalbrain"). eye am proud of my work, witch comes as easily as female ejactulation 2 women in videos when u search "squirting" with safesearch off.
there is much crack cocaine 2 be smoked, so i will be short. the CIA has used interdimensional listening devices in the molecules of crack rocks in this city, so i have to be quiet or they will pick up on my voice and seventeen different types of aliens will show up and try unsuccessfully to vaporize me as i bat away their UFOs with my enormous gay penis toward the galaxy andromeda. eye am not fucking around, eye have played cat and mouse with teh CIA for 2 long.
anyways, buy my NFTs.
More Posts from Crystalbrain7 and Others
this is "interchange". send ur ETHs here:
ok, this is some serious green shit wafting over some kind of fucking thing. i will not tell what that thing is, i refuse to do it, u can't make me; its privileleged information for me to hide from u. well not really since u can see it i guess. ok, i'll tell, it's a bunch of purple, black, and red stuff. are u happy? well maybe i lied, did u think of that mr. smartygokartypants? i could have totally just lied to u, like u could be colorblind and never know that i told a big fat lie and u would be the dunce in this situation for once and not me, who is always a dunce.
the green smoke reminds a little of "i dream of jeeeeenie" or whatever that show with the blonde woman with superduper powers actually was in the 1860s or 1960s or whatever. i only saw it on dick at night or dick van dyke at night or oh yeah nick at nite, that's what it was called which was tv for older people in my brain. the name of this is interchange i guess it looks like something changing to some ppl. please forgive me, i am stupid, give me a fuckin break already.
crystalbrain-magik rectangle NFT 1/1
buy nft here:
https://zora.co/collections/0x4b560a3eaF04524948ee863FAE30723B41755E01/1
ok, so there's some green shtuff, some red stuff, and its all fractalizized i guess. i see numbers here, which is some brains least favorite book of the bible except maybe revelation i guess because its possibly boring instead of being insane like that crap that some guy wrote while tripping his balls off.
but what the everliving fuck aaaare these numbers for? i don't know, but all the 1s make it so every column adds up to 10, and there are ten son of a bitchin fingers if u count both hands of a human. so it all adds up to 10 huh? isn't that boring, like to count to 10 u just put your fingers up, probably in order i guess.
but these red things floating in black, are they motherfucking happy about this? how about the damn green pixelated things? these are mysteries which are more organanic i guess, like toads people lick to get poisoned in a fun way maybe. i'm not sure.
there seems like maybe a path of something yellow or blue....who knows what that shit means. does this even mean anything? i have much eths to make from this yes...
more nfts:
https://undefinedlabelnoise.com/index.php?crystalbrain=list
crystalbrain-gates NFT 1/1
send ur ETHs here:
ok, so there are gates and doors. like u think of food goin into u, liek when u chomp chomp chomp down on a demonburger from burger king, what do u get? a demonburger in u! lol….anyanyways it passes through the "gate" of ur mouth yo. and its in u for a while, some of it becomes ur body, and some of it u shit out of ur anus, and that's a "gate" too. if ur male when u put ur seed in a woman, it goes out of the "gate" of ur urethra through the vaginina and ur cream finds an egg in there, and then maybe a bababy comes out of the "gate" of the vagina like 9 months later i guess. i think that's how biology works.
but these "gates", they're everywhere yo. like a door, is it an anus from the room ur in, or a mouth to the room ur goin into??? i'm not very smart, but maybe the room is a womb u grow ur seed in, especially if u make art in it i guess. are u fuckin with me ppl? i'm whipping out some wisdom for u to put in ur brain, even tho its stupid wisdom i guess. can u dig what i mean by gate? there's gates in both homoerotic and heteroererotic stuff i guess, its like some u go through and some u come out, and some u do both like if a dude's stickin a wang in someone i guess.
crystalbrain changes his dumb ass over to opensea.io
ok, so crystalbrain is a dumbass of teh highest order, this has already been estabablished. BUT a smart move was to start selling his NFTs on opensea.io instead of a different place. check out these NFTs for sale (which have already been posted elsewhere, there are more 2 come in the future):
crystalbrain-le avion NFT 1/1
buy this NFT with ur ETHs here:
https://zora.co/collections/0x5838e5923e479BD4d12868F9D554E7f68880Fb2F/1
ok, so birds are a strange thing. they fly over u i guess, and sometimes they fly at u i guess; it's a matter of taste or braververy for the bird i suppose. if the bird was an eth addict and u had some eth maybe it would fly into ur home or ur wallet or something. maybe it could be a meth addict bird and then it'd be skinny and ugly but this one looks more like something else, maybe a hypnagogmagogic hallucination (fuck, i hate teh book of revelations). but remember u can't spell meth with out e-t-h. that's ETH that u give me, and i promise I won't give any birds meth.
flying over ur head and pooping on u is sometimes things birdz do, yes. oui. why is there french in here? does crystalbrain even speak french like some guy that went to france so the maga dudes wouldn't nail him to the cross for being a filthy artist? i don't know, crystalbrain sometimes isn't too smart about these things, but crystalbrain is aware that in french pornos french girls go "oui oui oui!" when they're getting it on. that reminds me of the little finger that went we we we all the way home i guess, but maybe this is stupid because the finger wasn't on some french girl in a porno speaking sign language translation to the masturbators.
i guess what crystalbrain's trying to say is that crystalbrain is 1) fucking maybe insane maybe not and 2) created this art about birds which has nothing to do with meth or french girls saying oui or maybe it does. crystalbrain don't know.
https://undefinedlabelnoise.com/index.php?crystalbrain=index for a curatated list of crystalbrain NFTs.
crystalbrain-laser eye NFT 1/1
send ur 0.034 ETHs to:
ok, i got sumthin to tell u. its a secret. the laser, its liek HAL in 2069 a space fuckassy, which is my imaginary porno based on 2001 a space odddessy by stanlee koobrick. but this time there is a laser in the middle between two sets of brests, because this is the ideal place for a red light coming from a robot. but this is no regular porno, no this is a porno for robots, who are built for the sole porpoise of selling pornos to them. by making masturbation robots, u can then create a market to sell pornos 2 them. its brilliant for money making, and that's what syfy porno is about right?? right???
i know these don't look liek breasts, but they are syfy breasts since nerds cant get real brests this is the best i could do with. maybe they're robot brests???? i got a good idea, liek if u were on a space ship with a bunch of doods going 2 jupiter or wherever the fuck and the machine tried to fuck u instead of kill u, wouldn't u be happier? this is why 2069 a space fuckassy is a superior flick to 2001, even if 2001 has fantasy shit by director stanlee koobrick. r u with me people? robot sex = better than robot killing. i know arthur see clark wrote a novel aboot 2001, but that shit didn't happen, we didn't go to jupiter or wherever the fuck in a psychedelic tunnel of wtf in 2001, so we'll all have sex on a spaceship in 2069 instead.
do u people capeesh or do i have 2 go on????
crystalbrain-to be NFT 1/1
send ur ETHs here:
ok, so this is some green stuff with some red stuff that's mostly the same but it cums from a tweet i made and its got, liek, the words "to be" and a heart like the heart from twitter on it. so i guess its like a geometrymetic pattern created with software from an image and made into this 12 pointed star thing. there's actually RED and GREEN in the star, so there's like a six pointed hexagram and another six pointed hexagram and they're together and some people who are mostly dumb people liek me will prolly think this means something, even tho i dunno…maybe it does, maybe it doesn't liek you just. can't. know. i guess.
there's a background with like two columnums of light in some noise i guess, it makes the image a little more obscoor than it would be, yes. so you can totally sodomize your third eye or whatever imaginary thing u think with this image giving u light in teh darkness with noise i guess, its up to u, ur the hero, u be the guy that saves the day i guess.
this is genius shit for someone as stupid as me, buy it!
crystalbrain-dan quayle, savior of democracy 1/1 NFT on opensea
say what u want about dan quayle, he didn't get shot by jim jones and he didn't smoke our crack cocaine either. yeah, this guy believed our bullshit. i mean, he would be liek "no, no i don't want to cheat on my wife" but reagan and bush and I would insist, saying stuff like "well, this cock ain't gonna suck itself" 2 him and i guess he'd reluctantly comply. he was a real boy scout, and belieeve me, teh boy scouts are no strangers 2 sodomy. but this guy, we couldn't believe it, after bush would pull his dick out of his ass quayle would feel guilty about cheating on his wife, so we mostly kinda kept him away from teh dark shit we were doin', liek filling heaven with crack cocaine. yeah, he was a real moral kinda guy but he wanted that power, u know, 2 be a great leader and all that…fuck that, we were just about the money, crack cocaine, and hardcore, man-on-man anal sex.
but it turns out dat this guy coulda saved the illusion of democracy in america. yeah, i know, what the fuck are you talking about? i mean we ran the show with our three letter agencies, but this guy wanted ppl 2 be elected fair and square, so when that ass-clown donald trump had his brigade of neckbeard horse-porn masturbators march on teh capitol, vice president mike pence was supposed officially say that teh president was joe biden, and donald trump was reeeeally gonna throw him under the bus for that shit, becuz even tho it was teh democrats turn to unfuck things up that we'd fucked up, quayle was at teh certification during teh capitol riot and told mike pence 2 suck it up and say that joe biden was president.
so this guy, this fuckin boy scout, is one of the reasons u don't have trump as a dick-tater. so u have to give him credit for that.
crystalbrain-george motherfucking bush 1/1 NFT
ok, so do you remember this dude, george h.w. bush?? he totally held up a bag of crack cocaine on TV and this was supposed to make us like afraid of black dudes all high on crack with guns and shit. like ok what the fuck ever, you certainly remember the big quarter-rock of crack you took out of the microwave and passed around with me and reagan, or are you so short on memory, maybe from smoking so much premium rock? like i totally remember we were standing inside that petroleum refinery when i was 11 and you just sort of fondled my ass and asked me with a sweet grin if i wanted to get really high. and i was like "what the fuck dude, there's oil everywhere, don't light that shit up in here, you'll burn the place down." and then you hit it anyways and reagan had to put out the fire with a garden hose that i thought looked like a snake because i was so high after you passed the rock to me. anyways, saddam fucked with your oil in kuwait and you got pissed off at him like some wrathful babylonian deity and i was like "just chill man, the dude just wants a port to ship his oil out of, just let it be or something."
but then i took another hit of crack and the thought of blowing the shit out of a foreign country sounded kind of cool in that cracked up kind of way we had with ourselves. do you want to know a secret? saddam and i were like BDSM buddies after the war ended; yeah, i took my 13 year old self over to iraq and we were like trying out new torture techniques on each other, it was really kind of fun. can you picture my 13 year old ass with a whip just givin it hard to saddam while chicks in harem pants stuffed grapes in his mouth and slapped him around with hot spatulas? because i never told you about that george, i never got a chance to. so while most people remember the US army giving it hard in the ass to saddam, i was the real deal, i actually raided his palace and we played hide-and-go-fuck-yourself with all kinds of cool mesopotamian torture devices. what the fuck do you think of that, huh? you never had so much fun.
biography of crystalbrain
summary:
crystalbrain is a foolish idiot brain. they are composed only of the finest sugar, salt, and perhaps more illegal things, perhaps not…crystalbrain tries to maek a thought, but a thought owns them they think. they think to theirself "why do i exist" but then smells their armpits. crystalbrain sometimes says he, sometimes they, but 100% of the time is an idiot god brain. crystalbrain refuses to belieeve that the romans didnt pay their soldier dudes in salt, becuz crystalbrain doesn't want to admit they're wrong. crystalbrain rules over the entire universe and this is why the universe is so fucked. crystalbrain never got very far in parasite eve but thinks he's a "respect mah authority" on this game. crystalbrain has more video games than books in their brain. crystalbrain won't shut the fuck up and thinks stupidity is still stupid because he's stupid or maybe smart in that respect.
crystalbrain heard that if u took a piece of shit and threw them into space they would eventually turn into a crystal due to entropy, or maybe this is wrong. crystalbrain spent their youth doing speed enemas in their brainus. crystalbrain has never had a husband, a wife, or any kids that grew up to be little crystalbrains. crystalbrain has no electricity in their neurons but just really cool lightning shit that is the domain of enlightenened stupidity.
in the beginning…
…there was a tv. this tv got fucked in the ass and decided to give birth to a brain. this brain was in the fetal state inside the tv tube. after growing on disney, the maligignant semen created by priests who jack off in confessionals created quanantum shifts in reality that caused tv to explode, and one of these broken tv shards was crystalbrain. he was lodged in teh brain of an infant but no one ever knew, and having caused brain damage to this infant created a negative feedback loop of complete stupididity. the child didn't know it, but his subconscious did, that he would have to rise up and get revenenge on the priest who jacked off in the confessional and created the abominatation that is himself. this was a life-long task and there were all kinds of hurdles to complete, includuding not getting molested by anyone, learning how to avoid doing basic arithmetic, making sure that he grew up with proper non-heterosexual orientation, programming dick pics in QBASIC, and smoking copious quanitities of marijuana, crack cocaine, and meth.
part 2:
crystalbrain read the book naked lunch by william s. burroughs but he was 2 stoopid 2 understand it, even though it was written on drugs. he had hallucinations from the movie blade runner and modern society seemed to open up to him and make him a king in his own mind. the only problem was that he was aktually in rehab for going psychotic from doing lots of drugs. this was an unfortunate side effekt of being the kind of guy who smokes crack all the time, and he found taht the best course of action would be 2 make noise music. so he did this and set up a set of speakers 2 blast merzbow in front of the archdiocecese of some city or another. this caused priests 2 roll on the floor in agony clutching a knife and cutting off their pedophile genitals, but only a few boys were saved from being completely groomed and molested by catholic priest guys.
the nuns did not approve, but fortunately crystalbrain had artificial intelligence training on how to deal with nuns with machine guns. was it he that had the machine guns, or the nuns who had the machine guns in taht last sententence? it may have been both because the nuns advanced on him with machine guns and virginity on their minds but he totally wiped out like a squadron of nuns and they were black and white and red all over. this was a monumenental acheivment and he went on 2 become the king of the church for 2 minutes until the national guard arrived, but using telepathetic mind control powers he was able 2 maek the national guard become on his side, so they went rampaging through the cities leik a bunch of methed up guys with machine guns, which they aktually were since he gave them all glass pipes and huge chunks of crystal meth to smoke. anyways they were going 2 taek over whatever city but they ended up having homosexual intercourse instaed. this was expected because dudes with guns aktually want 2 fuck guys in the ass but they're too dumb 2 realize this so they shoot ppl i guess.
crystalbrain wandered the streets liek a manic preacher, telling people the gospel of drugs, but he really had kind of ruined his life because now everyone wanted him dead. so he sort of shifted down into an alternate dimension on the darkweb where there was a metaverse where dudes were selling acid and he met a dude with a bunch of cryptocurrency and they had lots of drugs. so now crystalbrain went into the school playground near the place he grew up and started telling ppl that taking LSD is fun becuz he felt bad about the idea of selling meth to kids so he just sold them acid so they would hallucinate lots of gaping maws of infininity swallowing their minds and sanity in a psychedelic void.
to be continued…
part 3:
doing hard drugs took its toll on crystalbrain but he had magical powers 2 heal his body and mind he got from a ghost in a graveyard. he had stayed up for 4 days and realized that reality was bullshit and that he had the power 2 heal his wounds liek a greek god or something. then he went 2 try 2 stop a train with his bare hands but no matter how much crack he smoked the train always knocked him out of the way. he decided 2 taek a bunch of thermite and melt the railroad tracks on a train in russia and this indeed caused a crash but it wasn't as satisisfying as making it crash by standing in front of it and punching it. he had a vision, a goal in his mind taht he would one day punch a train and it would fly into the sun and burn up. this was a dream he held on to for dear life.
one day he discovered pcp and this was indeed the cure for his ailment of not being abel to punch a train into the sun. he smoked some marijuana that was laced with pcp and suddenly he was the most powerful being in all of eternity and it felt really great. he found a train and punched it so hard that when it hit the sun it caused a solar flair that heated the earth by 10 degrees fairenheight for a couple minutes. if u ever felt hot maybe u were in his reality where this happened (in some other realities he did not succeed in stopping the train and got hit by it and died i guess but this is the good reality we're talking about where crystalbrain punched a train into the sun and maeks NFTs still).
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crystalbrain is deadly serious about being contemptibly stupid and also making digital art.
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