Crystalbrain Changes His Dumb Ass Over To Opensea.io
crystalbrain changes his dumb ass over to opensea.io
ok, so crystalbrain is a dumbass of teh highest order, this has already been estabablished. BUT a smart move was to start selling his NFTs on opensea.io instead of a different place. check out these NFTs for sale (which have already been posted elsewhere, there are more 2 come in the future):
More Posts from Crystalbrain7 and Others
crystalbrain-citrusixtyone nft 1/1
https://zora.co/collections/0xAD13f56d7436e7dF10B9c271DBB849caDC39fc75/1
here’s what i had to say about this nft.
whoa ok, i guess some imps that were laughing at someone's face told them in their neurons that i should make a fuckin orange thing as art. and this, my friend, is fuckin orange as can be. my dad (actually the superego in my crystalbrain) says its brownish, not orange, but i disagree with him, he's totally trying to assert his dominance in the field of color interpretation and i'm going to beat him right in the face with an orange if he does not relent and offer his apologies that this is fuckin orange as fuck. i don't know, is there like a sunset that could be as cool as this? i don't know, i think i'm going to offer an orange in exchange for my soul in the caves of some lost gods with like fucking rotten oranges on some altar cuz some guy left them there and forgot about them when he asked the orange god if he'd do stuff for him. i know this isn't cute, i know i have sixty five fucking neurons left after all of the philosophers ate them but if you give me a chance i will exchange some orange with you as a token of my eternal gratitude, i am totally going to win this, this is not a joke, you will have my friendship and an orange (not a brown).
ok, so that’s what i said about it. i have to remind u all (yes, “u” not “you”) that 61 cygni is the brightest motherfucking star in the sky, and that its also called deneb. its also a BINARY STAR which means that its dual as in if the stars had guns they could fuckin duel with each other because there’s TWO of them. however, this nft motherfucking is 1/1, so only one dude with ethereum can own it. are you still with me? reading this much stupidity requires some serious pre-interwebs attentionion span, so i am tellling u that u must buy this NFT if u like oranges, people saying things are what they are when they’re not, the star deneb, or duality in general.
if u buy this nft, i offer oranges as a token of my friendendship.
other NFTs and also free experimental music offered on this motherfucking page:
https://undefinedlabelnoise.com/
crystalbrain-george dubya bush commemoration NFT 1/1 opensea.io
ok, so liek when it comes 2 cocaine, i think he kind of wussed out. yeah y'all probably heard the rumors that he'd do it and believe me there was a time or two when he'd snort it off of my gay ass crack, but really george dubya bush was more about the man on man anal sex and fellatio. he was kind of a partier and man he'd totally have all kinds of women pretendin 2 laugh at his jokes after he drank some beer or some shit, but he just could not get into the hardcore crack cocaine smokin' lifestyle that me and reagan and his dad were into. we'd microwave up an ounce into a bunch of rocks and he'd be liek "naahhh, do you got any powder left in teh bag", and then we'd make fun of him, liek i'd get up behind him and pull his pants down and we'd laugh at the size of his penis, which was kinda small. and don't get me started on saddam, when i'd be whipping saddam in my batman suit he'd be liek "omg u gotta do that to me" and i'd be thinking "this guy is such a bottom". anyways one time i was peeing on his face and i noticed that he'd actually left some blow on the table; liek he didn't even do cocaine even though it was there, which breaks the first rule of ruling this world, which is that u have 2 do as much cocaine as possible.
and don't get me started on this "compassionate conservatism" bullshit, we warned him that we gotta be ruthless, liek i'm talking full on "drop a bomb into your motherfucking house when your kids are home", machine gunnin motherfuckers with depleted uranium, cocaine smuggling, full on roman-style torturing shit is par for the course, u can't maek those motherfuckers think u REALLY believe in good and evil. its liek this guy knew he was bullshittin' but he still pretended liek he was a good person. liek, hello? no dude, do ur cocaine, execute ur criminals and shut the fuck up. he even called out saddam hussein 4 gassing his own people. liek ok dude, who is he gonna gas, himself? that shit's just whack. this guy i never lieked, he was just sooooo confused. liek he actually believed in morals or something secretly and he was just tryin 2 be a psychopath bcuz his mother had weak genes she gave him or some shit. what the fuck is wrong with u dubya? were u just in it for the gay sex and NOT teh drugs? i'd hate to think that about u but then again i never lieked u anyways.
crystalbrain-crown prince mohammed bin salman in the cannabyss 1/1 NFT on opensea
ok, so this crown prince guy is similar to liek some dude in the west who got too involved in reading stupid satanic books and thinks he's some machivellian nietzschean superman but he can't match my powers cuz i destroyed heaven and hell and its all my show man. this guy smokes way too much pot, liek i shouldn't talk becuz half of my time is spent hitting teh crack rock but this dude thinks he's so fuckin edgy because he smokes so much weed. i was liek, "dude, ur teh crown prince, u need to smoke crack liek all teh other world leaders" and he just was liek "huh?" becuz he was so stoned. and i was liek "dude, ur not cool enough yet, here, hit this rock" and he got so cracked up and he was all paranoid from teh weed and coke mixing together and decided to attack yemen…and then he tried to think he was the ultimate edgelord becuz he'd smoked teh crack and he talked about his political manoovering and i'm liek "ok, we get it, ur an asshole, we all are dude, get over it"
i'm not sure what to think of this guy, he needs to grow teh fuck up and worship me, becuz i'm his interdimensional crack dealer who has liek a limitless supply of crack and a huge dong, and he's liek sitting on motherfucking mammoth amounts of oil so i know he can fuckin buy some from me. but then he won't pass teh pipe when u smoke with him, he tries to power trip and starts showing off by liek having a journalist executed blatantly and i'm liek "dude, u r such a fuckin dumbass, real men smoke crack, put that marijuana shit away, its makin u paranoid".
now teh thing about crack cocaine is that smokin a lot of it maeks u reallly paranoid but this guy just talks about how i'm his nietzschean superman when i fuck him in teh ass, as liek an excuse for his homosexuality that he barely conceals with his edgelord wars in yemen and syria. what a fuckin douche, i really hate this guy; i hope his ancestors come to him in a dream and castrate him and he wakes up with no balls, becuz it wouldn't make much difference, this guy already has no balls; he's just givin commands. he doesn't even liek bdsm himself, he just lieks a vanilla assfucking and that's just boring these days, i can't get these dictators to do anything original, it's all "oh, i'll tell my guys to go get these people" and then they give 'em liek a few blowjobs and a few envelopes of cash and boooooom they think they're so cool.
dickhead.
crystalbrain-circle of saddam NFT 1/1 on opensea
ok, so what u might not know about saddam hussein is that he really lieks his BDSM sex. liek, so much that he would totally do it involuntarily on people. i'll tell u somethin, smoking pipes of afghani opium and then hitting the crack pipe had a strange effect on saddam; he just sorta chilled out but became real detached about breaking peoples' ribs one at a time. i mean one time he had these dudes who were totally fucking sodomized with really sharp objekts, and i mean, do u really expect that guy to be able to shit after u shoved a cactus up the dude's ass? i mean come on, that's just fucked. but i mean, he lieked 2 torture ppl for fun, and since he was dictator he liek didn't need consent, he just had a bunch of dudes he randomly fucked in the ass secretly and they would round up ppl who were just tryin 2 mind their own business. then he'd offer them a crack rock and they would be too scared to turn it down; and so they'd be really high on crack while this dude is workin them over with all this medieval torture shit. he'd have his sons come over and we'd pass the pipe back and forth and take turns hitting dudes in the knees with a cricket bat. torture and crack cocaine really go well together; it's commonly known that crack makes u totally want 2 slowly kill a guy sometimes.
but dude, saddam had a total bottom side to himself, he was a switch, he'd be tied up with a ball gag and there was this special spot on his back he'd tell us to hit with teh blowtorch, and that was some grisly shit but he'd giggle liek a schoolgirl when u got it. he'd humiliate himself by watching the movie Hot Shots: Part Deux and then totally do the part where he puts his face on a bug zapper. in fact, they didn't do this in the movie but he put his penis on the bug zapper and he'd keep rubbing it against it until the flesh started melting off of it while we're hitting him on the back with a cat o' nine tails…dude was crazy. anyways, he was kind of a dangerous guy but i wasn't afraid of him, obviously he couldn't withstand my interdimensional superpowers. so anyways that's saddam, he liked his opium, his blunts with powdered freebase…he liked 2 kill the pain and then try 2 get the pain goin' as much as possible. dude never douched before we had our iraqi gay sex orgies tho.
crystalbrain-veryveryveryveryvery nft 1/1
Take ur ETHs here to buy this NFT:
https://zora.co/collections/0xc243E1C80aEC8b7229F586d54a4880CF074eA38F/1
now this is some grade a, no government inspected, blue energy looking shit that looks like its caressing your neurons like some "massooose" at a rub and tug. this looks like its straight out of some void or some galaxy that a telelescoper saw with its electric eye, and its exciting and calming at the same time. i don't like to use the word "energy" like some new age kool-aid drinker but its fuckin got a great energy to it, no? if i were stranded in space and i had to pick only one direction to go into and i saw this, i would totally point my dick in the direction of this blue thing. yeah maybe there's a blue star or some shit in it, but at least i would get to look at something cool before i fizzled into a star like a fuckin skydiver into fire.
i like this thing because i am crystalbrain and i make digital art therefore i am i think or maybe not, all the philosophers ate my braincells like i said before. but this is pretty neat, for you to have and you can mos def take your eths to it and be like "hey cool this is mine".
https://undefinedlabelnoise.com
crystalbrain-rectal trump NFT 1/1 on opensea.io
ok, so the thing about this is that this is teh RECTAL TRUMP, yes, this is what teh CIA wanted to do to donald j. trump, which is SHIT ON HIS FACE. this fact which is 100% true is becuz he was such an annoying sonuvabitch, we couldn't get him to do anything right. he had his own uninfoformed opinions about everything, he wouldn't listen 2 us or smoke crack, he was such a fucking shitface and this tribute is the 100% desire of crystalbrain to put FECES ON DONALD TRUMP'S FACE. yes u see him peering into eternity's rectum, and crystalbrain ate alternate dimensional versions of trump in order 2 send a huge amount of dump at trump. if u look closely u will see that the crap is made of TRUMP HIMSELF.
the thing about trump is that he's liek teh guy at the party who won't shut up. now i don't know about you, but here at crystalbrain's organization we take great pleasure in laying a log cabin on the faces of people who won't shut teh fuck up about how great they are. no, this is definitely what donald j trump had coming 2 him, he is totally covered in shit and this is a good thing for the future of humanity. we don't liek his ass so he gets 2 get a load out of ours!! we had 2 get minions 2 tie him down but in teh end it was worth it because teh stupid sonuvabitch finally shut up once he was choking on our excrement. imagine this for teh future of mankind: donald j trump UTTERLY HUMILIATED by SHIT.
don't even get me started on what we have planned for vladimir putin lol.
crystalbrain-crack rock on a scale 1/1 NFT on opensea.io
ok, so teh thing about music is that crack rock doesn't get 2 much mention as far as i know. it's fucked u know, some drug that's this powerful, and it got liek no mention. when i was a little crystalbrain, everyone was smoking crack. liek teh news was always sayin "hey, there's all these ppl smokin crack"…of course they tried 2 paint it liek only black ppl smoked crack becuz this scares white ppl, but there were white ppl smokin crack 2, not teh least of which was ronald and nancy reagan whom i have shared many quarter rocks with. yeah, they had teh best microwave money could buy in teh white house, and that muthafuckah was so good at cookin' rock that when teh lighter hit teh crack it sounded liek a sparkler. yeah, i've mentioned teh legendary crack rock that george bush pulled out of that sonuvabitch, but what i want 2 talk 2 u about today is musicians and crack rock, and teh serious lack of songs about smoking cocaine in rock form when it was at its height. yeah, there's some stuff by nas, a few mentions here and there in music, but 4 somethin that was so important 2 teh history of teh world, u would think that there would be more that would be devoted 2 such a sacred rock. no, when someone talks about a rock on a song, its usually an engagement ring or somethin i guess, not a rock of cocaine. or maybe ROCK N ROLL, which is NOT about smoking rock cocaine and rolling on ecstacy, as disappoiointed as i was to find this out.
thats why i made this NFT: i wanted 2 show how crack rock could be musical. on this motherfucking NFT we have a musical scale, and its motherfuckin got a lot to say namely the words, "C R A C K" and "R O C K"…how do u play this on the piano? well see, u pick up ur crack pipe with a rock in it, get up on teh keys, and start dancin' around like a crazy dude while applyin' a flame to ur rock. there is some leftover devilry from when i was talking about the crown prince of saudi arabia and how he just doesn't seem to get crack smoking liek george bush or saddam hussein or something, and thinks he's some kind of cool machivellian edgelord…anyways, it left an impression on my mind, and so we have some COCAINE in an upside down five pointed star lol. is this proper? of course, there is no way that cocaine can be used that isn't proper: in the nose, in coca tea form, in a syringe, as freebase, as rock, in a damn enema, and any other motherfucking way u can think to use it. maybe as eardrops? eyedrops? the sky is the limit 2 this incredibly versatitile substance.
crystalbrain-the treachery of reagan
ok, so ronald reagan was my republican gay sex partner when i was ten and he introduced me 2 teh fine art of smoking crack cocaine before he brainwashed me into victimizing ghettos in america wit the new form of freebase…we would hang out with dictators and the CIA and shit and just be taking huge hits of crack and we got so fuckin high and started talking about platonic philosophy or some bullshit liek that. i dunno, i was born when i was 9 in a TV but ronald reagan was the guy who fucked the TV in the ass and caused it 2 explode. anyways we were in a gay turkish bath and passing a pipe back and forth (it was the pipe u see in the picture) and we were discussing the fine points of enslaving people under a bullshit economic idea called trickle down economics or somethin when george bush walked in and he had this huge quarter rock that was fresh out of the microwave. we passed that baby back and forth and got so fucking coked up on that motherfucker that i actually thought that unsuccessfully voting for him even though i wasn't 18 yet would be a good idea. this was illegal though, much liek smoking crack or having nuns killed in third world countries.
anyways, it was a really good time. there was crack on the streets, the contras had their weapons and training 2 overthrow a democratically elected government, punk rock had already shot its wad, and no one could stop us until i turned traitor because HOLY SHIT these republican dudes are fucking insane! ok, so i stole all the crack i could and decided to go to another dimension where I buried liek $5 million dollars in individual vials of rock in teh arizona desert next to some atari games. i heard they exhumed the games but they totally missed the crack rocks that were liek 10 feet away. what the fuck, people? that's cash money right there. i don't know what to say except that i had a falling out with reagan because he liek got me addicted to crack when i was 10 and that just isn't cool man.
crystalbrain-wings of seven NFT 1/1
send ur 0.034 ETHs here:
what can i say about seven??? it's such a cool number! if u were a man with wings leik an angel or some shit liek that, u would have seven limbs right?? i'm going to say that this picture gives u wings because the salesman who sells crack in my brain said to promise this to my buyers. beware i can't verifify if this is actually true, so DISCLAIMER: i am full of shit possibly but maybe not. but what else can i say about this??? it's green, liek dollar bills i guess, which is kind of a neat thing if ur looking to buy a house or eat or have some fuel for ur rich guy fireplace. so as for the number seven, i can't possibley say enuff good shtuff. yeah the bible has some dumb shit going on in sevens but u can forget about this, because this is a non-christian seven, leik if u were a buddhist and u wanted this seven, u could have it without any of that bowls of gods wrath stuff.
what else can i possilby say about this? it looks liek it grew from an ancient civilization that exists on a leaf or sumthin, i can say that. wouldn't it be cool if ancient civilizations possibly with aliens grew on leaves? i would totally freak out and spooge if that were the case and i'd use my two wings to fly to the moon or something to tell the people on the moon about it. i mean no one on earth would believe me except for those dudes that take too much LSD or mushrooms, but on the moon, I dunno, maybe? or maybe on neptune because its the 7th planet from the sun, that would work cool i guess.
so if u want complicicated patterns in sevens u can totally take out ur ETHs and buy this NFT which i offer to ur brain.
crystalbrain-le avion NFT 1/1
buy this NFT with ur ETHs here:
https://zora.co/collections/0x5838e5923e479BD4d12868F9D554E7f68880Fb2F/1
ok, so birds are a strange thing. they fly over u i guess, and sometimes they fly at u i guess; it's a matter of taste or braververy for the bird i suppose. if the bird was an eth addict and u had some eth maybe it would fly into ur home or ur wallet or something. maybe it could be a meth addict bird and then it'd be skinny and ugly but this one looks more like something else, maybe a hypnagogmagogic hallucination (fuck, i hate teh book of revelations). but remember u can't spell meth with out e-t-h. that's ETH that u give me, and i promise I won't give any birds meth.
flying over ur head and pooping on u is sometimes things birdz do, yes. oui. why is there french in here? does crystalbrain even speak french like some guy that went to france so the maga dudes wouldn't nail him to the cross for being a filthy artist? i don't know, crystalbrain sometimes isn't too smart about these things, but crystalbrain is aware that in french pornos french girls go "oui oui oui!" when they're getting it on. that reminds me of the little finger that went we we we all the way home i guess, but maybe this is stupid because the finger wasn't on some french girl in a porno speaking sign language translation to the masturbators.
i guess what crystalbrain's trying to say is that crystalbrain is 1) fucking maybe insane maybe not and 2) created this art about birds which has nothing to do with meth or french girls saying oui or maybe it does. crystalbrain don't know.
https://undefinedlabelnoise.com/index.php?crystalbrain=index for a curatated list of crystalbrain NFTs.
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crystalbrain is deadly serious about being contemptibly stupid and also making digital art.
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