Please Forgive Me, I've Got Demons In My Head

"Where Jellyfish Come From," a screenshot study of a cute and sad story

Behold! The golden otp 🍙❤️🐱

Yum

Day 04: Hungry

Today is my birthday! (11/23) So I would like to gift you all with this announcement:

I have (finally) created my own food blog! @comfydarkeats ✨🍽✨

Food and art are both things that I greatly enjoy. When I was asked what my dream career would be, I answered that I'd want to be a food illustrator.

I say "finally" because, to be honest, even though they are my passions, it took me a while to just get started. Maybe it's the fear of making mistakes, or that the results won't turn out the way I want it to. Does anyone else feel this? 😭

A very wise friend told me, "Why not start with a 'bad drawing'? Why not paint a 'bad thing.' And just keep going until you finally get something good." In other words, I won't know if the piece is bad if I don't get started at ALL.

I'm also trying to apply this mindset in other aspects of my life. I admit to not accomplishing a lot of goals (let alone daily tasks) because of this fear of failure, fear of not getting it right the first try, which causes me to stop on my tracks and just be stagnant overall.

I know this is something I need to work on, but as I'm getting older, I'm learning that it's okay to make mistakes, as long as there's the eagerness and acceptance of bettering myself. I'm also trying to take in this saying, "There's no better time than the present." It's been said so many times, but I never really had that sink in until now.

Creating this blog is a small step, but it's important to me that I initiate at all instead of going, "someday." So here's to starting new things that may turn into accomplishments!

Is there something that you've been wanting or needing to do?

Resting and reflecting

Lately I've been focusing on other parts of my life and finding what truly brings me joy.

Despite the uncertainties, I'm thankful for these years of reflecting and facing head on my inner turmoils. I'm grateful for the love and support that surrounds me, be it at home or virtual. I'm especially grateful that, one of the reasons that I've been feeling at peace is I finally got the help of medication. I'm acknowledging that I needed more help than just therapy and meditation (although these are just as powerful resources), and that's completely okay. It's been helping greatly, and I'm relieved to feel more like myself again -- kinda like relaxing your jaw and realizing now that you've been tightening it this whole time.

It's only been a few weeks into the new year, but I hope you've all been well. Thanks for reading and sticking around, it's been a journey ❤️

Day 6: Drooling. Inspired by the Lily of the valley flower. 🌼

Day 10: Jump

Revamping

Ever since daylight savings, I felt more fatigued than usual. Does anyone else feel that way?

Day 17: Battle

(He probably needs to go to bed anyway.)