Why Great Value Bleach? This Shit Tastes Terrible

Came up with a joke when I was in hobby lobby, what do you call a lesbian bar that serves ice cream? A Klondike bar:) lmao

I'm sorry but the cat in the hat ride at Universal was so fucking horrorfying every thing inside that tunnel looked like they've seen the face of God and it makes it 1000 times better it was such a fucking experience

My guy is MORTIFIED

I needed to record this because r/perth is having a regular one today

Remembering the time I dropped half my bagel between the fridge and the counter and collapsed against the fridge and cried

Any room can be a panic room if you’d just give me a fucking second

A FROG BROKE INTO MY HOUSE

we had him in a Tupperware for the night and this morning I pimped him out in a giant storage container

(The enclosure is supposed to be pretty bare, apparently that's how they like it) I threw a starfish in there for ✨decor🙌✨ and I guess I'm going to have to hunt for bugs now. I'm open to names.

Who would you think would win five Disneyland employees or three Universal ones in a death throw down in like a field, one one hand Disneyland employees deal with a lot of hassle and crazy shit on top of their souls being owned by Disney, and on the other hand Universal employees are encouraged to keep the crazy but contained, they contain the crazy to a certain extent, shit is wild at night. So idk but I definitely feel that at least two Disneyland park employees would die first. Also a lot of Universal employees are on something, so there's that to consider.

Hello, friend. I hope you're well. :) What is your favorite kind of sandwich?

I'd have to say pulled pork with an unholy amount of cheese

At my local playground passing by and saw the most Majestic demon ridden thing I have ever seen

Randy marsh is so babygirl