I Wish That I Could Have A Dick- Not Forever Tho I Don’t Wanna Be A Boy But Like- Maybe Every Monday

Mammon headcanons :)

I’m not feeling well still but I do wanna write again and I’ve been thinking a lot about him so here y’all go. I know y’all are used to nsfw but this is just some cute little things that I think Mammon does :)

•$• he has a very wide variety when it comes to music taste but his favorite song is No More ?’s by Eazy-E

•$• if you’re in the car and he’s on aux cord he’s absolutely playing it and it makes Lucifer slam his head against the steering wheel in disappointment

•$• Mammon’s top 5 songs on Wrapped

•$• he used to make fun of Asmo for liking Ariana Grande but then the Thank U, Next album came out and he was like “fuck, this goes hard”

•$• he’s not particularly an Arctic Monkeys fan but Arabella makes him think of you so he puts it on and thinks of your pretty lil face when he needs motivation, it’s his good luck song

•$• I feel that the rest of the songs on the list are self-explanatory if you’ve heard them

•$• he has a group of friends that he plays poker with once a week and he’s very good at poker

•$• no luck at the casino but when Mammon plays poker he’s coming home with the bag. He’s got an excellent poker face and he always gets great cards

•$• he makes you come with him and sit on his lap while he plays

•$• “need ya with me, treasure, you’re my lucky charm”

•$• this man and his obsession with nicknames for you

-treasure

-pretty thing

-dollface

-darlin’

-precious

•$• and that’s just a few

•$• back on the gambling thing, whenever he wins big he’ll always get you somethin’ shiny as a gift like a new necklace or a ring.

•$• “had to pick up a pretty thing for my pretty thing, you like it?”

•$• he seems dumb but he’s actually very good at picking up on things

•$• he always knows what you’re feeling and what you need and he’ll do anything to give it to you

•$• he loves you so much, if you ever need reassurance on that he’s happy to give it

•$• “you know I love ya, treasure. Id kill for you and I’d die without you, you don’t gotta question that”

Me when world building: 😁👍

Me when I have to write the smut part: 🤢

Thinking about..

You’re the wife of a high ranking demon in the devildom. Your husband meets up with a couple friends to play some poker. And like clockwork comes the avatar of greed, Mammon. He plays with the sinister smirk he always has, somehow managing to drain the bank account of everyone but your husband. Your husband scoffs and says Mammon is merely lucky today, he’ll get what’s coming to him. When your husband finally sits down for his turn, Mammon laughs and looks in your direction, golden eyes sparkling with temptation.

“Why don’t we make this more interesting? If I win this next game, you let me fuck your wife.”

And confident as always, your husband replies in agreement. Your brain says you should protest but the ache in your thighs says to watch it play out. And so, you stay silent.

Easily, Mammon beats your husband at his own game. And just as easily does he fuck your brains out right there on the poker table in front of your husband, ruining your pussy for all other cocks and leaving you wanting more.

(Just for reference, this idea is not up for grabs, I plan to use it so please don’t write something based off it :’) )

Also have y’all seen that text story with him Mammon and Levi trying to find Satan a good dentist and deciding who’s gonna check on him?? Lucifer is the sweetest-

People really think Lucifer is some cold villainous evil man when he's canonically gushed over Mammon calling him Dad once, gotten so embarassed over making Diavolo bad cookies he blushes at the mere mention of them, and gotten so enraptured in a novel he cried.

He can be a menace but he's also a mess, never forget.

:(

Dan and Phil you need to release this video I am having a menty b and I need the 4 hours of brainrot

slut era (overthinking, ruined sleep schedule, constant feeling of loneliness and existential emptiness)