I always said the same thing
when asked about relationships
and the reason why I was never in one.
I said it so much it felt a bit rehearsed
but it was true.
I did not need anyone to be happy,
I did not need anyone to come
and step into my world
only to mess it up.
And for so long I kept that up
I let no one in for anything else
but a simple friendship because I knew
that if they left it would be okay
but you came one day and overtime
became that one person;
The one that I never wanted to let go of,
because things with you were great
you came
and became part of my happiness.
Now I am finding it hard to let you go
but I know I will be okay
because I have rehearsed a new line
and it goes a bit like this,
“I learned what love was and I will be okay”
because although I still leave your space
in our bed open as if you would lay there again
I know you won’t and maybe,
just maybe things were meant to be that way
because
I learned what love was
And for that I will forever thank you.
M.S.I
the intimacy of “how did you know that?” “because i know you”
being in yr 20s is abt experiencing the worst thing you can imagine & then having to go to the grocery store
MSI
Maybe forever wasn’t for us,
perhaps what we have right now
is all we’re meant to have...
is that so bad?
Let’s live forever right now,
love like there will be no tomorrow.
All we really need is right now.
MSI
<Right Now>
You asked,
What is the scariest part?
I answer;
the scariest part is not the feeling of loneliness
or the darkness that fills you
despite the looming pain
of emptiness
The scariest part
is the realization
that you have lost yourself
completely
sinking in as you lay awake
At 2am
because you lost the ability to sleep
and you can’t even cry
because you don’t even care.
A.D.H
The truth is none of us want to be adults..
25 May 4:25 am
I have sat here and typed and retyped but nothing comes out that can express the feeling, the only way I can think of is asking the question... When will it pass?
When will I stop picking up the phone to call you only to remember that where you are you cannot receive calls? When will I be excited and not have the instant thought to share it with you knowing that I can't? When will I be able to go to sleep without wishing I did so knowing you were one of the people I spoke to in my day? When does it end? When does this loop end? I am tired. Please stop this feeling because it hurts too much.
Ivy House, Greenwich, Connecticut
photo via melissa
𝙹𝚞𝚕𝚢 𝟸𝟷, 𝟷𝟿𝟷𝟹 𝚃𝚑𝚎 𝙳𝚒𝚊𝚛𝚒𝚎𝚜 𝙾𝚏 𝙵𝚛𝚊𝚗𝚣 𝙺𝚊𝚏𝚔𝚊, 𝟷𝟿𝟷𝟶 -𝟷𝟿𝟷𝟹
[ID: I cannot sleep. Only dreams, no sleep. END ID]
— Sylvia Plath, quoting an acquaintance in ‘The Unabridged Journals of Sylvia Plath’