Experience Tumblr like never before
"She suspected the real cause of his anger was his not wanting her to be amother or a sister. A part of him - the part that hated what he was; even hecouldn't be without that - must also hate her, for the way she got under his skin, ever so slightly, while remaining, finally, irrelevant. He wasn't angry because she knew his secrets; he was angry because she couldn't be the way out of them. Hadn't he looked at her, now and then, with a moment's real interest? An interest that quickly curdled into something like contempt- for himself, for her, for his inability to follow through?".
Fellow Travelers.
Omlll, Thomas Mallon made such a well aimed take with this one. I believe that everyone completly misunderstood Hawkins character bc he wasnt a dreamer but a realistic guy that tried to survive being himslef(in the extent that he could bc of society). And bc of the misinterpretation of his character ppl tend to hate him and to see him as stoic and insensitive when, eventhough he actually tries to be this, he cant bc he simply isnt like that and at the end hes got feelings and in the book we can definetly see that and its just so sad how his homophobia and societies wont ever let him be free at all, and I feel that this paragraph really expresses it. And this is just incredibly sad, I really think that Hawkins tried to live his life in his own way, like trying not to deny what he was but at the same time he apreciated and craved for a "normal" and perfect life, which at the end this destroyed him, bc his fear and cowardice for not living his truth were what took everything he ever loved away from him.
Anyway, I love the show and the book is greatt and im literally gonna kms.