Elementary School - Blog Posts

So my best friend and I started joking about how crazy our old private school was and the more we talked the more we realized it was actually really messed up and horrifying. So here’s some things that happened to me from 4th to 12th grade in my American private school!

- The entire school was taken out of class for an entire afternoon to silently hold hands in a field as a “fundraiser” for the school gym. The principal went around with a bottle of water for kids to drink out of via waterfall so we wouldn’t pass out in the 85+ degree heat.

- We spent an entire semester watching nothing but kidnapping videos for our “life science” class. Given this was during the Kony 2012 instance but we’d watch videos not only about him raising his child army, but also security footage of different children getting kidnapped or almost getting kidnapped so we’d know we weren’t safe anywhere. We weren’t taught how to avoid it, just that it was very possible. We weren’t in high school yet is all ill say.

- A teacher was hired who had no education or training as a teacher, was doing drugs on campus, and would spend entire class periods cursing out children and telling them they would never amount to anything.

- We watched videos of people being possessed by demons, terrorized by demons, and so on. In two separate years.

- We were never taught what mental health was. At all. There was only demon possession.

- We had to do a project on abortion which included looking up and printing out pictures of the different steps then presenting it to the class to prove why abortion was wrong.

- We were told to never have sex or else we’d get STDs. We were never told what sex or STDs were, much less how to prevent STDs or have safe sex. The word sex was used maybe once and only with “never have” in front of it.

- Girls (yes only girls) were told they’d be viewed as “second hand goods” if they kissed a boy before marriage and no one would want them. This was in our Life Management textbook.

- Boys were told to walk on or next to the road on a date so they’d be hit with a car and die instead of the girl. It was not a “just in case” thing. It was a “you will sacrifice yourself at 12 years old” thing.

- We watched a slow motion, graphic video of two teenage girls getting into a horrific car accident because they were texting and driving. It was acted out but left nothing to the imagination. They died in the video and we saw it all.

- For prom, if you brought someone from outside the school, your date had to be interviewed by the principal and the dean, fill out paperwork and sign in, and then you and your date had to get a lecture from the dean about how we were expected to act at prom.

- We were told to never date anyone who wasn’t of the same religion as us. If we did, we would marry them, have kids, get into fights, divorse, lose everything to the ex-spouse, and end up living under a bridge starving to death with your children for the rest of your life. This was a legit example used in the Life Management textbook.

- We were not told what abuse was or the different forms it took.

- Teachers would “kidnap” an entire class in between periods to prank another teacher. Sometimes an entire class would go missing for a whole hour because of this.

- We skipped over the entire chapter on breast cancer in our health class because it had the word breast in it. We never learned how to check for breast cancer ourselves to make sure we were healthy. It was an all girls class.

- The Life Management book had a story in it about a man and a woman. The “homely” man was in love with the woman and asked her to marry him (they were not in a relationship). She said no. He kept asking her for YEARS and she kept saying no but he wouldn’t give up. Eventually, she looked over at him in church one day and realized wow looks don’t matter at all he’s a good religious man. She agreed to marry him the next time he asked. So I guess if she says no you just keep asking! You’ll wear her down eventually!

- We never learned what rape was.

- We never learned what sex was or how to have it safely.

- We never learned what mental health was and how to get help.

- We never learned what abuse was and how to have a healthy relationship besides the above mentioned “never take no,” “you’re broken if you aren’t pure,” and “sacrifice yourself by throwing yourself in front of a bus.”

- We were taught in Life Management that men needed to ask out the woman. If she did it, the relationship would forever be unbalanced and he’d feel inferior and would never respect her.

- Rock music is a sin so don’t listen to it

- Women who go too far are second hand goods and will die alone because no one wants them.

- Don’t kiss before marriage because that’ll make it more special.

- We did a whole project on why evolution is wrong. And were never told what evolution was beforehand.

I’m sure there’s more but that’s just off the top of our heads! Can honestly say it was the most toxic environment I’ve ever been in and I’m horrified looking back on it.

11:00 pm mini rant

thinking about how elementary school me (2010's) didn't understand Yo Mama™ jokes and kept embarrassing herself when other kids tried to joke or tease her.

2-4th grade was not a fun time for me

Thinking about that time in 3rd grade where a boy was teasing me but I watched to many coming of age movies so I thought it was a •°`perfect`°• idea to try and 'start a roast war'

It went flawlessly /s

Totally didn't lose any aura points after that.

(Bro I think my aura was at like -2000 at that point because I'd always been a weird kid but never really know or understood it)

Thinking about how in 2nd(second) grade I had learned what up/down head nods meant so I yelled (💀🚪🤸🏾🧍🏾🤧) across the fucking cafeteria to one of my classmates* just to give him a nod up and receive one back 🫤💀

-300 aura

*I later realized that I somehow fancied this boy the tiniest 🤏🏾🤏🏾🤏🏾 bit for some godforsaken reason (he didn't like me for obvious reasons)

Realizing that I was actually Cringe™ as hell in elementary school and I still somehow had friends...

Rememberimg that time in 2018 when Dabbing™ was a thing and I hit a perfect one and some kid told me to do it again so I did

Istg I hope I never have to meet elementary school me

Also I went through a canon event (for girls)

I Hate Pink™ phase (pink is such a pretty color, it's not my favorite but I appreciate it)

I'm Not Like Other Girls™ phase

(I literally am. I love being like other girls. I love being a girls girl. I love girls(women))

....just why

Elementary School AU

The sorta cover for my comfort au featuring a young Whitty and Me! Funfact that the uniforms are inspired by me old elementary schools. This au is personally just for me and my friend to just pour our hearts on with nostalgia

Overall au idea (copy and pasted from another post):

Basically (young/newborn) Whitty escaped to Sourwater, Florida (fictional town ofc) and found by a young me and her family. Taken in, Whitty join’s PT(me) elementary school and their friend group. PT is basically just that messy wolf girl that loves to play warrior cats with their friends FAR out into the field.

Whitty x Me: Elementary school AU

I decided to make a comfort au that is based on my actual years in Elementary and all the times I had in there, with young Whitty!

Basically (young/newborn) Whitty escaped to Sourwater, Florida (fictional town ofc) and found by a young me and her family. Taken in, Whitty join’s PT(me) elementary school and their friend group. PT is basically just that messy wolf girl that loves to play warrior cats with their friends FAR out into the field.

Yes this is infact based on my actual experiences in Elementary (the playing in the fields rping warrior cats is real 😭) and yes that is a caricature of me in elementary school so the design is pretty accurate.