Am I Alone In This? - Blog Posts

It’s frustrating when your parents just don’t listen. It’s upsetting at the fact that one doesn’t seem to care about who you choose to be.

I am not the child. I am not the child anymore, the child doesn’t need you anymore, I am the young adult that needs you. I am just confused on what to do as someone who wants to be seen as…them. I feel alone and yet I have those that love and care about me.

I don’t want to give up. I went through too much shit to just give up. I have too many things I want to do.

I want to see the snowy tundra.

I want to feel the warm sands of the beach.

I want to be engulfed by the salty waters of the sea and brushed by the branches of the green.

I want to see my friends smile & laugh.

I want to watch my favourite movie.

I want to listen to my favourite songs.

I want to smell & taste my favourite foods.

I want to live. I want to create.

I am not gonna die. I won’t die.

I am a knight who has seen & been through shit. I am not giving up!

I will not give up!

I will live. No matter what.

Cotton Filled Ears

The person who has been with me thick and thin.

The person who loved me when I don’t feel loved.

The person who gave me life.

Is the person who deserves my upmost loyalty.

And yet…something about you changed.

Your eyes are the same ivy green gaze.

Your voice is still as powerful as the unshakable gods above.

Your ears are able to hear my song.

Yet, when I am distressed at the man you call husband.

All I get is numb green eyes.

A voice of uncertainty.

And cotton filled ears.

LISTEN TO ME! JUST PLEASE LISTEN TO ME! LISTEN!

I JUST WANT YOU TO LISTEN! WHY CAN’T YOU LISTEN?!

WHY CAN’T YOU SEE MY SOUL I BEAR TO YOU?!

WHY. Why must I suffer alone? I don’t want to be alone.

Not again…why am I alone? Why do I feel so…

Am I doomed to venture in this alone?

Can’t I get help for this pain?

The answers…are yes.

It’s hard. It’s fucking hard to venture into the unknown pain alone.

But I have survived worse.

I WILL TAKE DOWN THIS PAIN.

Go away you cotton eared creature.

Go away broken souled husband.

I want my mother back.

I want my peace back.

For I am….a knight.

Anybody else think rocks just look... tasty?

Just

Tasty

I wanna take a bite out of it but I can’t

(The picture is of rose quartz)