You Fight For Her. You Don't Even Try With Me Anymore

Will these thoughts ever stop?

Nothing works anymore, drugs don’t work (escaping reality) medication doesn’t work (happy pills/sedation pills/sleep pills, therapy/venting/ranting/talking about it doesn’t help, doing happy stuff doesn’t work, no matter what I do nothing changes or feels any different.

Okay Google how do we get a divorce

slip from my zine – a handy life hack

I just feel like stuck. Every day is the same and I'm just existing not living.

so last year during a period of intense suicidal depression i made this necklace that i always wear, right, and the thing is it's genuinely brought me a lot of comfort and relief and i've developed a strong sentimental attachment to it, to the point that i can inarguably state that it's had a net positive effect on my mental wellbeing. however i did now just have to stop to almost throw up laughing because i realised that i've succumbed to the amulet.

rainbowpaw is thinking about suicide

with my first ever paycheck i bought myself two canisters of helium incase i ever wanted to kill myself so i hid them in my closet and then i ended up living so they were just there for years and i finally decided to get rid of them so i recruited my mom to help me dispose of them properly bcs they’re literally metal canisters of compressed gas so you gotta recycle them properly and her response was to put them on her church-mom-swap group chat saying ‘my daughter bought these for a special occasion that never came to pass, they’re available for free if anyone can pick them up!!’ speechless.

I don't know how much longer I can keep doing this

sue zhao / unknown / suzanne rivecca - death is not an option / Horace Vernet, The Maiden’s Lament (oil on canvas) / Louise Glück, Adult Grief / unknown