no, I didn’t write these. you don’t have to fear for my sanity.
waking up from a car crash with a different boyfriend than I remember
both me AND my crush got those daddy issues
my hot boss moved in with me…strictly for safety reasons!
blind date with a hot doctor got very weird, very fast
obnoxious guy next door is actually the art hoe of my dreams
my girlfriend who is young but old is an alien
she tries to turn me into a demon so we can be together FOREVER
wrist grabs, kissing and cross-dressing, oh my!
doctor wants to marry the dead girl on his gurney
bad-ass ice queen has a softer side…activated by a boy and cockroaches
flirty training techniques make him fear for his life
when your mom tries to get you laid and then tells your whole school about it
water nymph wants to seduce my cru- I mean the prince I have ZERO interest in
he wore a cardboard cutout with his crush’s face on it…that’s love
what to expect when you’re expecting a demon baby
got out of prison just in time to crash my bf’s wedding
proving that hoe-ing it up is beneficial to finding a relationship…w/SCIENCE
my crush has a secret future wife and she’s jelly
can’t stop flirting with the hottest ghost girls in school
pretend BF willing and able to catfish together but also why are we doing this?
she nearly drowned him, and now he’s in love with her
hospital roommate trying to cuddle in the middle of the night
I hired a hitman for myself, but his feelings were more romantic than murderous
he’s planning to kill her right after this date
she didn’t realize she’d been talking to her crush all along…in another man’s body
recently came across The Beatrice Letters by Lemony Snicket which screams love in every possible way. So I had to make my own version of it. Dramatically speaking: An homage if I may.
I will love you if this is the last time I get to tell you, and I will love you if this is the only time I get to tell you that I do. I will love you as an empress loves her emperor, and as the emperor loves his subjects, and as his subjects love their empire. I love you as a moth loves flame and as flame loves metal. I love you as a warrior loves her sword and as the sword loves to draw blood. I will wait for you as Olaf waits for summer and as a pied cuckoo waits for rain. I will love you if our forever starts today, I will love you if our forever ends today, and I will love you if we never even stood a chance.
I love you as the sun loves the sea and as the sea loves the salt. I will love you as long as it takes to separate the salt from the sea and the salt from my tears. I love you as Shakespeare loves tragedy, and as tragedy follows every hero, and as the hero slowly starts to fall in love with the villain. I will learn to say I love you in every existing language, and then I will learn to speak your love language. I will love you as the poets love the moon and as the moon loves to chase a car. I will love you when you think the world of someone else, I will love you as that world falls apart, and I will love you as my world falls apart. I will love you when my world is full of light, and I will love you from the shadows of my mind.
i love when i “make a mental note” of something. it’s gone within 20 seconds
“I suppose I love this life, in spite of my clenched fist.”
— Andrea Gibson, Birthday
🪄 ✨
This makes me so happy and sad at the same time.!🥺
Rainer Maria Rilke, Sonnets to Orpheus: First Part (XXV) (tr. J.B. Leishman)
hands are cold but feet unmoving, watching magic in the night
I didn’t mean to say it in my head and I didn’t mean to whisper it at night
it’s nearly night, frost creeping in on silent feet
it’s the song of night that draws me in
at night, when I’m alone, I look up and I can see the stars
a lantern far away glimmers and I can run away into the night
take me to a place in the middle of the night when the stars shine brighter as the sky turns slowly lighter
in the coolness of the night, send the shadows into flight
But as I’m walking forward, I’m walking into the night
in the heartland, where the night creeps in solemnly
you bought tomorrow and banished the night
if I ever think about you at night, if I whisper your name so soft
make a little more color in a lightened up night
and the night was upon us as the dark came creeping in, do you remember?
sometimes I dread the night, and feel so bitter
if the night can hold my hand and if the shadows are my friends I guess I’m alright
I can’t see the moon against the brightness of night
waiting for the light to untie night’s strings and the sky to come undone
the night was ebbing in and out like the sea
I am the power, I am the night
the past that haunts and fears that slide around in the back of my brain at night
like the closing of a story, the night rolls across the page
which is more lovely, the night or the day?
late night hurting, fever’s chill, I want a word, I need a will
let me stich your constellations onto the quilt of my night sky
(hears a song lyric) this would make a great all-lower case fanfiction title
FLOWERS AND SCARS
The flowers you once gave
Are now my bookmarks.
Dried and black,
Yet somehow artful.
Like the scars, you left behind
To bookmark
The person I was, and have become.
Dried and black,
Yet somehow hurtful.
(13.11.20)