Cody: Don’t Worry, I’ve Got A Few Knives Up My Sleeve.

Audible Symphonia Edition! Where Cassian takes the symphonia (maybe a new one just for this) and reads Nesta’s romances in his courtier voice. 

And then Cassian starts putting his own commentary into it like “go to bed, Sweetheart” or “I can do this much better, you know. In fact I would (insert graphic details here)” and when it hits to love confession scenes, he’ll pause and say “I love you, Nesta Archeron. My heart and soul belongs to you.”  

And Nesta listens to it all the time. She finds she doesn’t mind that he keeps interrupting her reading, since he’s always doing that anyways. She listens to it over and over again especially while he’s away because it makes her laugh, but also because the sound of his voice brings her comfort. 

au where anakin raises his kids in complete secret. but- BUT- they still live on coruscant. with padme.

no one knows who the father of the amidala- cough cough SKYWALKER- twins is, and some conspiracy theorists come up with a few names- rush clovis, bail organa, hell, they even throw obi wan in there. a few even throw anakin's name out, but after a short disappearance by them, they say, shakily, that theyve changed their mind.

however, the jedi council starts to figure out one by one that anakin is the father. its starts with obi-wan, who knew it from day one. then yoda finds out because anakin mutters under his breath, "i have kids to take care of, man" when confronted with a mission. plo koon finds out when he sees anakin leaving padmes place with a photo of his kids. it goes through the entire council like, this, but no one mentions it. they all think they're the only ones to know

and they dont even say anything! some of them start leaving anonymous packages with little care items at anakin or padmes door and some place small notes under anakin's doorframe. the entire jedi council (and also the entire 501st, who has known since the beginning) is acting like a daycare center for the skywalker twins. this is mostly because anakin goes six days without sleeping and is tired all the time

so 95% of the jedi council knows, and guess who doesnt? mace "HES TOO DANGEROUS TO BE LEFT ALIVE" windu is completely oblivious and all he thinks of anakins condition is "karma, bitch"

but one day anakin stumbles into the jedi council room, barely functioning, running on four hours of sleep for a week, and he says "im out. kick me out of the order. i have two kids and a wife and i feel like im about to collapse. i dont care anymore. kick me out. i can get a job on the streets. sorry"

AND MACE IS LIKE "skywalker, take a seat- WHAT IN THE MOTHERFUCKING NAME OF THE FORCE DO YOU MEAN? GET OUT! YOURE OFF THIS COUNCIL AND OUT OF THE ORDER!!"

but tHEN every single jedi in the room shouts, at the same time, "NO!" and they all look at each other, and at the same time, ask, "you knew too?"

mace is completely stunned as the jedi start being like "oh yeah i was giving him the anti depressants what were you sliding under his door?" "i was the one giving him the aspirin" "obi wan was definitely giving him the kindness notes"

despite the fact that this is NOT the jedi way, they agree to keep anakin in the order, take him off the council, and actually pay him someting better and give him a little bit less missions ("ANAKIN AND OBI WAN ARENT THE ONLY JEDI WE HAVE, GUYS")

mace is in shock and actually tries to bring it before the senate but bail organa is chancellor and hes like "lol nope those are my god children" and he files the complaint case back away.

Okay but I want Azriel to be absolutely head over heels for Gwyn in a way that the other Bat Boys weren’t for their mates (before they got together).

I want Az to become a blushing mess when Gwyn compliments him. (Or even just smiles at him)

I want Azriel to go from “blank face, unreadable, scary shadow singer” to absolutely beaming when Gwyn walks into the room.

Give me the whole inner circle being confused because he’s so relaxed and comfortable around her and LAUGHS (which before ACOSF we had seen him do once, maybe twice) out loud.

(“He’s only known her for like 6 months guys, what is he on?”)

Give me Azriel being completely at ease and visibly relaxing when she walks in the room.

Give me nervous Azriel because “oh my gosh she’s right there and I think she’s looking at me oh my word she’s so perfect.”

Give me Cassian and Rhys subtly teasing him about Gwyn and his face turning bright red.

Give me Azriel getting nervous to ask her to dinner but willing to be straightforward with her because even though it’s terrifying he’s willing to face the chance of rejection (literally something he struggles with, ya know, the whole “I’m not good enough” thing) if it means he also has a chance to spend time with her.

I want this man to be absolutely head over heels for her and and for everyone to be aware of it.

honestly Anakin and Padmé’s secret marriage has so much comedy potential and TCW did not take advantage of that at all

I’m talking ridiculous sitcom hijinks

Anakin diving out of Padmé’s high rise Coruscanti apartment in his knickers to avoid getting caught

Padmé sneaking into the Temple to hang out with her husband, gets caught by some random Jedi, claims she’s there to meet... uh... Master Yoda??? Gets roped into having tea with him for the next 4 hours

They get sent on some diplomatic mission together... (with Ahsoka maybe?). it all goes tits up as per usual... they *have* to kiss to avoid getting caught. they get super into it. Ahsoka coughs loudly like “the bad guys have been gone for five minutes”

Someone asks Anakin why he’s visiting Padmé’s apartment. he claims he’s there to fix her washing machine. Ends up doing odd jobs for every single resident of 500 Republica to keep his cover

Bail Organa is literally for Star Wars what Nick Fury is for Marvel and Charlie for Charlie's Angels and I'm so up for it.

Man brought Mon Mothma, Riyo Chuchi, Ahsoka Tano (aka Vader's former Padawan) and Obi Wan Kenobi (aka Vader's former Master) and many other others to fight with the Rebelion under the noses of the Empire without them not even suspecting. Deserves more recognition.

I've said it once and I'll say it again, I HATE Amren with a passion and after acosf I'd be happy for her to leave on a permanent basis.

I honestly think Amren has alterior motives regarding the Night Court considering how much she was pushing Rhys on the idea of being High King....like what? He's just tied his fate to his Mate's and you want him to literally risk it all for power???

I see you, you little Asteri traitor 👀

My 9 yo brother is LOSING HIS MIND watching AotC. Anakin's attempts at flirting have him howling with laughter, and he's more invested in the bonker sky chase than in any battle so far. Proving once again the Prequels are very enjoyable to their intended audience - kids.

why are people so weird about vhagar whys she always talked about like aemond is evilly forcing her to do things against her will ‘poor old girl just wants to sleep :( she must be so scared and confused at being made to fight her dragon friends. and after having been bonded with so many strong women now shes bonded to this awful misogynist..’ WHATT are you talkingg about. thats a crocodile the size of a mountain she LOVES to kill she LOVES the taste of blood and evidently she also loves aemond or she would make her displeasure clear by eating him

I'm normally a big bitch about anachronisms but I'm willing to handwave them for School Spirits bc decades and decades is sure to make your memory murky and mushy. Wally misses Debbie Gibson despite her first album coming out three years after he died? He heard it after he was already trapped. Emilio showed Charley Crash Into Me in 1994 even though the song released in 1996? No he didn't, Charley doesn't remember what song it really was and he's substituted one he's heard Emilio listening to since. Quinn was a huge Veronica Mars fan in 2004 even though the show would have only aired a handful of episodes when she died? It's one of the few things she remembers about herself before the mind draining numbness of being stuck in a loop and she's latched onto it as part of her anyway.

Like I am SO willing to make shit up about the things they say that aren't right in the timeline if it makes it sadder. Love it.