What About Alfred Though

someone asked me for more protective bruce, and i heard tim was having a hard time recently in the comics, so here's a sketch of bruce shielding a young tim at a gala they're both at

Dc's like if Jason wasn't taken in by batman he would be a priest, Jason would be a race car driver, Jason would be a tyre salesman who's okay with kids dying, and they're always wrong I wholeheartedly believe that if Jason Todd wasn't taken in by Bruce that kid would be dead

as much as i know that being home sick means i still need to get online and do my schoolwork so that i dont die over the weekend, i thought i would sponaneously combust if i had to look at a chem equation

I just learned that Jim Henson was so conflict avoidant that there was this time his lawyers were arguing and they wanted him to get involved and he said 'nope, I've got to catch a flight to London' and then he got on a plane. He did not actually have to go to London he was just trying to get away.

That is so profoundly relatable and absurd.

To add on this, alternatively, Bruce bringing over a Normal Person Friend™️ for once in his life and the entire family being completely convinced that they're some kind of secret hero and very unsubtly trying to sleuth out which one. They're all 100% sure that Bruce is just fucking with them and are completely detirmed to find out what George the accountant is actually up to. Is he a hero? Maybe an anti-hero that Bruce won't admit he enjoys the company of for his ego's sake? They don't know, but, goddammit, they want to. Bruce insists he's just a friend from a charity gala. BUT IS HE REALLY THOUGH.

I have seen a lot of fics about the Justice League finding out Bruce has kids and being shocked about it, but what about the other way around? Like imagine Dick ghosting Bruce and ignoring everything related to Batman for six months after an argument and the day he finally decides to visit to make amends he finds fuckin Superman chilling on his kitchen, or like Jason coming back from the dead, ready to fuck shit up, just to get whiplash after finding out that his loser dad has friends and one of them is Wonder Woman

In fifth grade a boy tried to impress me by swallowing a whole tadpole live and I punched him so hard that he puked and the tadpole was fine.

me, today, expiriencing another major life event: do you think the coach will let me skip pe

every time my life gets worse my immediate reaction is always something adjacent to "at least i'll have a good backstory" as if i am a fictional character and not just a dude

Siegfried (1921) by Thomas Theodor Heine | The Cat on the Pillow (19th century) by Adolf von Becker