Keep On Running Up That Hill, Ladies.

Nothing is more unattractive to me than feigned helplessness, I see people on here say "I was never taught X" and I just think... learn now then.

a thing that really shook me was the study where women performed worse in a math test when they were wearing a swimsuit vs a sweater whereas for men there was no difference. objectification literally diminishes your brain capacity. i can't help but wonder what we could be in a truly liberated society because there's no way that how we are raised to be objectified and to even self objectify hasn't thoroughly poisoned our brains to always underperform even in normal clothes.

sometimes i think about how like, a decade ago, it was a common feminist thing to point out that "female" is a dehumanising thing to call a woman, since misogynists would often use the term in a derogatory way and now terfs are like "aha well im an adult human feeeeeemale". you're failing feminism actually

"Men's sexuality is visually oriented women's sexuality is relationally oriented" I really resent the idea women don't care about looks or the idea that women prioritizing warm relations and emotional safety over looks is "natural". Maybe hetero men should get systemically raped and sexually violated for 10,000 years and then we check back to see if they are still only primarily visually oriented or if they start caring about good relations and warm, safe feelings more too. Men just being able to focus on what aesthetically pleases them sexually is not "natural", it's a privilege afforded by social domination and having less to worry about safety wise.

People giving JKR shit for Cho Chang will never not be annoying to me as an actual Chinese person. The thing about Chinese is that there is no perfect way to transliterate it into English, as the two languages are just too different from each other. And while there are more common romanization systems than others, ultimately it's up to the discretion of the individual person for how they want to transliterate Chinese into English. In the Chinese editions of HP, Cho's name is 张秋, which would most commonly be romanized as Zhang Qiu (East Asian names are written surname first, given name second). However, it's completely reasonable to assume that Cho's parents simply decided to romanize her name differently because they personally felt that Cho gets the pronunciation across better than Qiu. I've known plenty of Chinese people, and also people whose languages do not use the Latin alphabet in general, who spell their names in English differently from how the more standard transliterations would spell it, just because of their personal preference. If anything it's no different than Catherine vs. Katherine, so trying to use Cho as a gotcha against JKR is not only annoying and nit-picky, it's also just ignorant. Which I suppose goes for a lot of the criticism against her.

wow this is a great insight, thanks anon

you can pry starting sentences with 'and' or 'but' out of my cold, dead hands

About how men rape women with “consent”

This post is not mine, but one radfem woman from our community. She works as a sexologist and shared her experience in her work. If you too are a sexologist, or even better, have some statistics on this topic, please share your experiences or links. ---------------------------------------------------------- "When I first started working, I discovered that many men had never experienced the need to refuse intimacy with a regular partner. That is, a man in counseling complains that his partner often refuses him, he attributes her refusals to personal dislike and faded feelings, and when he tries to turn the situation around and remember when he himself had to refuse her, he does not understand what we are talking about. Because he has never had to - he responds to the initiative of his partner every time and considers it a sign of love and attraction on his part.

I heard this very often, I couldn't catch the lie and at the same time I couldn't interpret it. They are not robots, after all, to be available 24/7 at all hours of the day and night?

One day a client in a session literally opened my eyes with one phrase.

She said: “I CAN SEE WHEN HE'S NOT UP TO IT.”

That's the secret. The notorious emotional service. Subsequently, and many other women have confirmed this in a targeted survey: when the desire for intimacy arises, a woman assesses her partner's condition BEFORE taking the initiative. If she sees that her partner is tired, sick, in a bad mood, or preoccupied with something, she does not consider it appropriate to offer sex. I have also heard from many women that in a situation when she can not clearly assess the state of the partner, she prefers to flirt, as if casually get naked, as if accidentally do something that usually arouses the partner. If there is no reaction to this, the woman usually refuses to take the initiative and solves her problems on her own, without forcing the partner to conflict and feel guilty.

Men don't want their partners all the time - it's just that no one gets in their underwear when it's inappropriate. No one forces them to think about sex when they don't want to think about it.

Men themselves don't usually check against anything but their own erections.

They don't care when to offer sex to a woman(the following is a real and far from complete list):

Who is asleep (well, seriously, I don't know any woman who would ever think of waking up a sleeping partner to satisfy her sexually);

who's back from her 24-hour shift;

who just finished cooking a holiday dinner for ten people;

who has a high fever;

who's been vomiting all day;

who is eight months pregnant with a complicated pregnancy;

who has undergone a termination of pregnancy that day;

who is in the terminal stages of cancer;

who's just had a pet die;

returning from the funeral of a beloved grandmother;

waiting for a call from the NICU where their (mutual!) child is (“Let's get a little loose while we wait”) - and so on and so forth.

It may seem like it's a matter of cognitive distortion, that they just don't get it….. But they do. I asked one of them once: does he really think that a person in such a state can want sex? Yes, it is clear that they don't want to, he replied, but I'm just in case - maybe it will work out. I asked him how he would react if it didn't work out, and he admitted that he would be hurt and angry. And that's another “secret” - why it does burn out. Because refusal will inevitably lead to conflict, and a woman often does not have the strength not only for sex, but also for an argument. When he offered sex, she basically can not get out of the situation without damage - either to be raped, or to deal with his tantrums and offenses. And unfortunately, sometimes the first one turns out to be the lesser harm."

My mum; I don’t think she’s ever identified herself as a radical feminist, but intentionally or not she lives so many of the core tenets. She’s the one that taught me about financial independence and the importance of an education and critical thinking. She’s also a firm believer in comfy shoes and in the almost 30 years I’ve been her daughter I don’t think I’ve ever actually seen her wear makeup.

It sounds silly but seeing her without makeup makes it easier for me to let go of wearing it now. I have my dad’s colouring, but my face is so much like my mother, I’ve seen pictures of her at my age and if you changed my hair a little we could be twins. I hope it stays that way. I hope I develop laugh lines the way she did.

I want to take a break from discourse for a moment. Reblog or reply with a way a woman in your life is awesome.

I’ll go first. My mom is the most determined person I know. I’ve never seen her give up on anything and she always keeps a cool head when solving problems. She knows when to take a break and has impeccable work/life balance, but when she is working on something she is completely focused and always the most useful person in the room.

i bet there were guys in the 1800s who were super fucking Reddit about everything, but no one had the right word yet for why those guys were so annoying. so they just had to wonder

idk if there's like a good anwser to this or not but

i always wondered why the solution for my dysphoria was hormones and surgery because the solution for my eating disorder isn't to just lose weight, the solution to my anxiety isn't to isolate myself, the solution for my ocd isn't to give into every compulsion, so why is the only solution for my dysphoria giving into it and letting it control my life?