"Tax Fraud Isn't Fun Anymore."

"What happens if you inject AI with adrenaline?"

There is literally no difference between 4 and 3. You stop these lies

I... I just saw a kid with a jar of Nutella. He just brought Nutella to school in his backpack and took it out in maths.

“Smells like science...”

-A girl, with a great sense of smell, literally walking into the science lab

"Can you live without a brain?"

“When I get to Hell, Satan will throw a ball at me.”

-Me, explaining how much I hate PE

“We thought it was a toilet chain!”

-My grandma, talking about my great grandmother’s very expensive jewelry

“There’s definitely a small banana joke in there somewhere...”

-My teacher, to a student, after she explained how we’d be putting condoms on bananas and he said he might as well put it on the real thing

“Nothing is ever romantic if one person involved is dead!”

“MEEEOOOWWWW!”

-My cat. Loudly. In my face. At 3am. Every night.