Louis Using Himself As A Bargaining Chip To Save Claudia And Daniel’s Lives Vs Daniel Using His Body

Love in the Air: Sky’s Desire to be Loved

Sky is already breaking my heart. What I really picked up on in this episode is despite the pain, disappointment and trauma Sky carries with him, he still ultimately just wants to be loved.

At the race, when he first realises Prapai is staring at him, he looks slightly taken aback in a pleasantly surprised sort of way. Like ‘oh, he noticed me’. It’s evident that Sky finds Prapai very attractive, and so when Prapai takes him aside, you can tell that Sky is shy, nervous even. That’s the sort of reaction you only have in front of someone you potentially like. However, as soon as Prapai comes out with his proposition, Sky’s impression of him immediately does a 180. You can tell how hurt he is by this revelation. It’s not simply ‘oh this guy is an asshole too’, but more so, ‘why is this happening to me again?’

The fact that Sky agrees to their one night stand is more than just about repaying a favour or rising to the challenge. To me this is a sign of self-destructive behaviour. I think he resorts to his usual defence mechanism which is playing nonchalant. Maybe if he pretends to be unaffected and somehow detached from this emotionally, he won’t be hurt when it dawns on him all over again that this was purely a physical transaction. But he goes into this knowing that he’s hurt, hurting and will be hurt further by it.

I think Sky feels better when he has control and is taking the initiative. Because then something at least is on his terms, and he can convince himself he’s okay that it is just sex.

So Sky chooses to give in purely to lust, and to allow that to sweep him away. He is able to enjoy their night together simply on a physical level. However, immediately afterward you can tell Sky is unhappy, empty and regretful. He feels like nothing but an object of desire. His attempt to detach himself emotionally wasn’t successful. So he reaches for Prapai again for that momentary high. The brief comfort that comes from connecting with someone during sex is only temporary.

People who have experienced abusive or toxic relationships, desperately want the other person to love them equally, and are therefore willing to compromise their own discomfort, their own boundaries and concede to more and more to please that person.

I do also think that some people who are desperately seeking love, sometimes mistake any form of intimacy as a substitute. They’ll take what is offered to them, even if it makes them feel bad about themselves. Which is why I believe Sky continued to engage with Prapai that night, because he probably tried to convince himself that it was enough, which clearly backfired.

Then we see Sky leave the hotel, looking so dejected, small and alone. What kills me about these scenes is the quiet resignation in Sky’s acceptance of the situation. He just looks like he’s thinking ‘how could you be so stupid?’ And when he says “you’re also an asshole” - he sounds genuinely disappointed. Like he was really hoping Prapai would be different and prove him wrong.

Sky then returns home where he clearly wants to cry but holds it in. I think Sky believes that if he truly broke down in that moment, then he would have truly admitted defeat. That it would be affirmation that he has allowed this to get to him and hurt him, when he was so determined not to let that happen again.

“Shitty things always happen to me”. When bad things happen repeatedly to someone, it’s easy to internalise that as if it is somehow your fault because the common denominator is you.

Later in the episode, there are multiple scenes where Sky reiterates that he doesn’t think Prapai would ever truly be interested in him. That Prapai’s interest in pursuing him is just for sex.

When he answers Prapai’s call for the first time, he doesn’t yet know who it is, and yet Prapai crosses his mind. This shows that Prapai did leave an impression on him. Sky has not completely erased him from his mind.

The other important detail to note here is that even though Sky deems Prapai an ‘asshole’, he doesn’t at any point say he’s not attracted to him. He’s always commenting on how he feels Prapai wouldn’t be attracted to him. This demonstrates that Sky does genuinely believe (despite all his negative impressions) that Prapai is out of his league and would never take real notice of him. He would not be having these thoughts if he didn’t like Prapai on some level. And he hates himself for that, because he feels he should know better.

It’s because he’s attracted to Prapai that he can’t help feeling taken by Prapai’s advances. He even peers out of the window to see if Prapai is still there. He repeatedly tells himself to shake out of it, knowing he shouldn’t entertain these delusions.

In the last scene where Sky receives the sunflowers, he’s taken aback for a moment when Prapai tells him why he sent them. “Cause sunflowers face the sky, I can’t be the sun for you but whenever you see sunflowers, remember that this wind’s watching over the sky”.

Sky is aware that Prapai is sweet talking. But he can’t help himself from being genuinely touched for a moment, like his brain is going ‘see, someone is doing this for you, that must mean something right?’.

At this stage Prapai doesn’t fully mean it. Not really. The man has no idea what his own feelings for Sky are. But this was still surprisingly heartfelt and sweet. A passing comment which meant a whole lot to Sky in that moment because it was so nice to just hear someone try and sweet talk him for once - regardless of how genuine it was.

Sky is clearly conflicted over his feelings around Prapai. He knows he should be staying well away, but at the same time he can’t help but want to be the object of someone’s attentions. Little does he know how deeply Prapai will come to love him.

only together

whoever invented cozy in bed was a genius. and whoever invented getting up should be burnt at the stake

Confession: I have a friend who likes to text me at like 4am when he’s had nightmares or he can’t sleep or he just needs a friend. He thinks I’m always awake at 4am but really I go to bed around 12am and I change his text-tone to the loudest one I have just so it wakes me up when he needs me.

Watching Star Wars in chronological order is so funny.

Obi-Wan Kenobi really took one look at R2D2 in the middle of the desert and said “No, Luke, I’ve never seen this fucking droid in my life. Looks like a real bitch though. Not that I’d know. This is my first time meeting the asshole.”

No one in that whole franchise was Gatekeep-Gasslight-Girlbossing quite like “Ben” Kenobi, regular human-man.

I love how every week in post-episode interviews, jacob anderson is just chilling and pondering louis’ precarious psyche and being like ‘oh louis is so fucked up. that man is Not well, can you believe how unwell he is??’ while assad zaman kinda looks like he’s been up all night trying to absorb armand into his soul and he’s like ‘armand is a little scheming bitch, he’s always scheming and planning and also he’s lonely. but mostly scheming’ and then every once in a while a wild sam reid appears and he goes ‘btw whatever they’re telling you about lestat, they’re lying and my close personal friend lestat de lioncourt is NOT happy about it’

Elrond as Gil-Galad's Herald should be portrayed more often as a polite political fiction. Like, Elrond's heritage should put him in a very important political position, given exactly how many lineages of kings he's related to. But he's basically allergic to being in charge and every time a council member mentions Elrond getting named the heir, Gil-Galad has to spend half a day talking Elrond out of a tree. But they can't disregard it completely because there are plenty of elves whose loyalty is tied closer to Elrond than Gil-Galad no matter how publically Elrond defers to him.

So, they compromised and made him Gil-Galad's Herald, which is an important position that tells everyone he has Gil-Galad's explicit trust but also means he spends more time playing diplomat and messenger than expressing his own political opinions. Also, it'd be funny if Elrond spends more time essentially pioneering healing techniques than anything else and Gil-Galad sending him out on Herald work is essentially him saying "you're not allowed back in the library until you've eaten at least three meals (diplomatic dinners) and talked to ten people, you're the healer why do I have to tell you this."

Also, something with the two of them going to great lengths to try and get people to forget that Gil-Galad isn't actually that much older than Elrond. And at least one political dinner where a bard is about to sing the Lay of Luthien and has to make awkward eye contact with Elrond, because that's his grandma. And the public consensus that Elrond is probably the most forgiving person on middle earth given he acknowledges his technical kidnappers as his technical foster fathers. And how that acknowledgement technically makes him and Celebrimbor cousins (as opposed to the more distant cousin relationship through his grandmother, Idril, daughter of Turgon, son of Fingolfin, brother to Feanor - aka the guy who made the first jewelry wars were started over, Celebrimbor's grampa).