Chad Squidward, By Definition, Is A Pretty Boy.

The Riddler: Riddle me thi- Is that a fucking kid.

Dick Grayson, a non-native English speaker: What does fucking mean?

The Riddler: Fuck- I mean shit- I mean it's a grown up word, ask your dad about it

[A Few Years Later]

The Riddler: Riddle me th- Is that another fucking kid

Jason Todd, raised in Crime Alley his entire life: Who the hell you calling a fucking kid? I'll beat your ass motherfucker, you and me right now.

The Riddler: Wow you are. Something.

[A Few Years After That]

The Riddler: Riddle me- Where the fuck are you getting these children?

Tim Drake, raised in high society but also not raised at all: That's a naughty word sir.

The Riddler: At least you're polite

[A Few More Years Later]

The Riddler: Riddle m- WHY THE FUCK DOES THIS ONE HAVE A SWORD!?

Damian Wayne, above silly things like Vulgar Language: I Was Expecting A Battle Of Wits, But You Appear To Be Unarmed.

The Riddler: WHY DOES HE TALK LIKE THAT???

Y'know I got tumblr because I just wanted to say my random thoughts but i'm kinda scared of this website. What's with the Pikachu guy? So many ads! I can't tell if i'm crying of laughter, hysteria, or nervousness 😭

So y'know how Batman and Iron Man like to help *cough cough* adopt *cough* sad chuldren (specifically orphans)? Yeah i have a thought, don't get mad, and i NEEDED to share it.

Batman meets a kid (cause we have to change a few things) who just lost his parents to a car crash. Kid's got a whole company to take care of and expectations and eyes on him. Batman, of course, adopts him. The kid? Tony Stark.

Now Tony heard of the incident, truly heartbreaking, and decides to attend the funeral because the Waynes were good people. He meets their only son and child, Bruce, who's in this depressing and angry state. Kid's got no one but the butler (Alfred) to look after him. So what does Stark do? He (unofficially) adopts Bruce and looks after him.

Now there are quite a few plot holes but fudge it, it could work. I just think that though they strongly dislike each other they also would've understood and adooted each other if one was younger than the other. But like i said, lots of plotholes.

Was anyone going to tell me "cat" means "battle" in Old Welsh or was I supposed to learn that by myself?

Last night I had a crazy @$$ dream.

So it's raining outside, my dad decides to go fishing in the rain in the parking lot like a crazy person. He does this jokingly but brings his actual fishing stuff.

My mom, who is not my actual mom but is now Kirsten Dunst (as a redhead), comes out of the car and let's us kids play in the rain.

Then my dad's friend (a famous guy I can't remember now) also shows up and just starts talking to him.

Suddenly Thor and Lady Thor fly in and begin talking with my dad as well.

But none of that matters because freaking BILL NYE THE SCIENCE GUY SHOWS UP! He drifts in, parks perfectly, and is dressed like he was just at a fancy event. The man asks my father," What are you doing out here in the rain?"

"Fishing."

"Oh. Cool." And proceeds to CATCH A FISH. IN THE RAIN. (Then stomp on it to kill it but that doesn't matter because plot holes, fish is alive again). Mind you this is a parking lot there's no actual source of water just a bit of flood. This man appears andsuddenly a fish does and he just "hm, catchin fish in the rain" like it's nothing! We were gobsmacked, appalled, absolutely flabbergasted by this man (who we didn't even know in the dream.)

So now suddenly we have a group of five adults and five children and the adults decide "Hey wanna go danger driving?" "Yeah sure."

Apparently the music dictates the danger survivability. So no one dies until the second part of the dream.

The second part of the dream begins where the first left off. Danger driving (which I can only describe as driving in a partially destroyed car against other partially destroyed cars but where they have a slope so they crash into you and you try to dodge them). They all survive, of course, and decide to go to a park for the kids (which there are now like fourteen of).

One guy (the guy whose face I can't remember though it could've been Samuel L. Jackson) stays behind to take a smoke while the rest of us enter the sloped tunnel entrance.

Then, a glimpse. A mechanical head with ugly scars and crazy white hair sits in front of a computer watching us. Or more specifically, Bill Nye the Science Guy. The culprit turns around reveals himself to be...ALBERT EINSTEIN! (Whom looks more like the robot president from Inside Job).

The man was but a mere face mask for Bill Nye the science guy to wear when he had a horrible accident and had to go vegan because he couldn't eat meat anymore. Then when he recovered he built him a robotic head as an A.I. for Bill Nye the Science Guy. But he no longer wants to be that, a mere robotic head. He wants more!

So what does he do? He decides to build himself a robotic body and kill his creator and his friends. He merges with the body and picks up an axe (that looks a lot like stormbreaker) and goes hunting.

The first to die is the man who was left out smoking, head axed clean off!

Then we head back to my POV. Where I am holding my baby sister while climbing down the slippery slope. Luckily there are pools on the side for me to use as leverage and balance while my dad RUSHES ME AS IF I'M PURPOSELY GOING AT THE RATE OF A SNAIL.

I eventually get to the park. My cousins and sisters already there, the adults watching (not really) while talking amongst themselves.

When Bill Nye the Science Guy decides to go out for a bit. He lights a cigar (which he would never do in my heart) and never smokes it. Man just holds it in his fingers and observes the world.

Then his head is hacked off. Clean, one strike like the other. Albert Einstein (yes we're still calling him that) readily picks up Bill Nye the Science Guy's head and shoves it in a jar. He proceeds on with an intent to kill everyone.

POv back to me, we're all having fun till my uncle (actual uncle)'s head do flying off. Thor and Lady Thor try to fight him while everyone else runs away. The kids hide in the rooftops and the adults scatter.

Albert Einstein fights them off and hides only to find us and proceeds to try to kill us only for him to find I HAVE SUPERPOWERS! Specifically electricity.

So I fight the dude off and try to negotiate him because I gotta protect my cousin's and sisters. That succeeds because he realizes he can't defeat me since he's a robot and so I go to tattletale on the adults but that plan completely fails because "mom needs to be alive to watch after us" and the thors kinda ran away as in Thor got badly injured so now they have to go.

Anyway Albert Einstein doesn't like that so he tries to kill the kids again and I stop him but now there's no negotiating so I tell em "hey, you guys gotta go." And I hold him off there.

That's it, that's the dream. I dunno if I succeed if the adults are all gone, if the kids survive, or if I hold him there forever. Quite a dream wasn't it?

Luckily I went back to sleep (cause it was eight A.M.) and had another dream that was pretty cool and weird but not as weird as this one.

This boy goes through more trouble than autobots go through emergencies.

Sooooo I made a little something-

Y'know if you really think about it "i love meat" and "i love nuts" are the same thing.

But also the opposite.

Quick question, is it wrong of me to post my own story here cause it is darn adorable and everyone needs to see it