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i made it digital now (bloodless ver. below)

i am so normal i promise

alr that's it for today, i need to sleep lmao

« Shall we dance Peter ? »

A Rumi drawing because they are amazing

SPOILERS for like every jrwi campaign but they just love having one pc who is a spy/traitor/not what they seem its like a pretty consistent thing in most campaigns. riptide? jay is a navy spy. prime defenders? there's the whole thing they set up with ashe working with his dad behind the rest of pd's back. apotheosis? the original plan was that all of the characters would turn on each other and fight to the death because they all had such conflicting interests (though specifically pre transition elena). blood in the bayou? rolan was a bug the whole time. total monster kill? everett betrays the whole party and joins the hybrids. judgement? mel killed the king. the suckening? shilo was (unwillingly) a sleeper agent for edward. I think thats where the 'troy is a robot' theory came from and even if that isnt true he still WAS a spy just also kind of a dumbass. I love when you can find consistent themes through campaigns that they obviously enjoy doing. yes girl ruin that party dynamic

chip jrwi moodboard

@codecicle @bizlybebo

also rotating troy in my mind. he really does care he's just so so bad at expressing it and it makes me a little insane like. calling blink and runt his team. hyping them (especially runt) up constantly. making himself the "fall guy" so runt, blink, and ripley could escape what he thought was a dangerous situation. giving runt his goggles when it was too bright for her to see. using himself to shield blink, runt, and ripley from the clockwork soldiers' view. giving runt his spare change of clothes because she was freezing (and snapping at her and blink when they commented on it being nice of him.) looking proud of lint for stepping up in his stead, only to bury it as soon as HE noticed it (and proceeded to shove lint into a trash can.) he cares so much, but it's easier to be mean and still be perceived as cool than it is to think about it much deeper than that.

omg thats so embarrassing i havent updated my age since. i made this when i was 18. well oops im 20!!! lmfao

omgomg is this anything

wonderlust animatic to pink floyds "time" about troy lougferd

i can see it in my head omg im just not talented UGH

it started with the clocks at the start then i kept listening and i was like wauw.. this is so troy angst

oh my god also !! i meant to ramble about how he seems to not care about his own wellbeing. this is more hc-ish but still. the way he always says he can take it, or how he doesn't seem concerned with taking care of his wounds

but he is always concerned about the rest of the team's wellbeing, he asks if they're okay (esp runt when her cough acts up) and just generally seems to prioritize that more.

just the things that does to me like omg. i love him

ACTUAL BRAINWORMS AHEAD ABOUT TROY

i like actually have SO many thoughts about troy yall dont understand. i have so much to say that i dont remember ANY OF IT TO PUT HERE.

its also been to the point that like. its all i think about. its so bad rn too bc i ran outta both my antidepressants and adhd meds (fuck pharmacies theyre all a pain in the ass omg) and so my brain is this mushy slurry of just. troy troy troy wonderlust runt troy troy blink troy. i literally could not focus at work today i had to write in my journal so that i didn't implode.

anyways after this point there are spoilers so dont read on. i woulda tagged it but this post is gonna be so rambly and full of my brainworms that i dont know if i wanna tag this at all lmao. so anyways yeah brainrot brainworms warning if you read ahead,

so yeah i have some like ideas on what troys whole deal is (besides being our [recovering :3] asshole nepo baby).

like first of all, 100% trans coded (like all of charlies characters, like wtf how is this cis guy better at being trans than i am??). please let it be canon i am begging

second, im torn between the theories of him being a little clockwork guy or being a hybrid (like runt and blink n the reclaim guys). its hard to tell what's cannon and what is troy mode comedy shit, but it seems like we may not have ever canonically? gotten a description/confirmation of what is actually under troys suit, and obviously not what may be under his skin. if he is a hybrid that could have some really fucked up connotations asw

third, whats his deal with his family? it's basically been confirmed that his mom's dead (or otherwise just OUT of the picture). his dad is around, for a bit i was SO convinced his dad was gonna be the inventor. either way, whats the deal between them? just nepo neglect? or something worse? i have a feeling either way i WILL be ugly crying. again. to jrwi. about a charlie character. and also siblings?? he said he had a brother. but then when the yort appeared he said he always wanted a brother? so maybe bad relationship there too?

also??? like his character growth?? the amount he has started to be able to convey his respect and care for the team. i love the little part about runt having an actual feeling of looking up to him when they sled down the mountain. they are so sibling coded. troy and blink's little arc was so good too (also like. malewife troy. all im saying about that). and his whole thing in ep 22, the way he was able to twist the perceptions people have of him, and even the fucked up shit he has done, to manipulate (gaslight gatekeep girlboss) his way through that situation. and the team letting him take the reigns!!!!! anyways this makes me wanna compile a list of my fave quotes/interactions/moments/etc from the campaign. i just might.

i genuinely dont know why im SO attached to this goddamn character. theoretically? i should hate him. he is like, literally antithetical to everything i am and stand for. literally a foil to who i am as a person. but like???? idk. as ive said before he's the first character ive ever understood and felt the "i can fix them" thing about lmao. and he has shown character growth,

and to me he seems. misguided? maybe even hurt? by those around him. it seems like those who should have nurtured him failed him. and like. i really empathize that. i kinda feel that a little too much (but from a different lens bc i am the furthest thing from a nepo baby lmfao). and not to psychoanalyze him (more), it seems to me that maybe deep down he thinks very lowly of himself. bro is literally prince charming but was surprised when aeon called him pretty boy?? like i mean obv, he's not the brightest guy around, but i also think he should give himself more credit where its due, and he might not appreciate his achievements enough and seems to beat himself down when he doesnt reach his own standards. he also seems very touch starved (or just. any [authentic] slightly positive interaction starved in general)

or maybe im just projecting too hard onto him oops lmao. thats the vibe i get tho

if you read all this i think youre probably just as ill as i am about this guy and like. respect. or maybe youre just bored or thought there would be something smart in here, in which case i deeply apologize for my word vomit

anyways i think im gonna go rewatch wonderlust from the start for like the fifth time. or riptide for the like 12th (god give us our funy lil pirates back!!!) because. i lobv them

"You can't be a lurker on tumblr." Yes, you absolutely can. I've been quietly reblogging things since 2014 and I haven't interacted with anyone in years.

my dtiys for twitter >u< !!! feel free to do it here too though !!! tag #faer1efiredtiys for entries :D you have full creative freedom just keep the theme similar :D no ai/nsfw/etc as usual ofc