Listening To Ethel Chain’s Perverts In The Middle Of The Night, While Also Being High, Was Probably

there’s something about when it nears the end of the night that i have to go through internal crises like should i drop out? am i unlovable? am i really meant to be alone for the rest of my life? will i stop dreaming of outfits i’ll never have? feeling nostalgic for where i grew up but would actually rather die than have to be stuck in my hometown again. will i still feel like god hates me even though i haven’t been to a church in years because i can’t bring myself to be in one anymore? am i turning into my mother? was my mother right?

but i usually will just gaslight myself by saying i’m just a girl and that’s that.

a week of midterms down and a break is right around the corner. so i’m pregaming a break the best way i can; which is having a high shower, lay in bed with a03, and Outkast playing.

laying in bed with the fan on, when it’s already cold, with a pile of blankets on, and rubbing your feet together like your a cricket is what probably i look forward to the most

at looking back at my previous post i might possibly abandon the lovely cricket feet rubbing because i want to actually crunch on a camel menthol crush rn

i wake up in the morning, am reminded of the country i’m in everyday, and the i get sad again. (my friend just showed me kanye’s new t-shirt merch)