Bartender: Thanks For Stopping That Bar Fight, Spiderman. Can I Get You A Drink? It’s On The House

English added by me :)

just so you know, you have some followers who enjoy/write fanfiction. not saying their urls rn bc i don’t wanna air out dirty laundry in public but if you want them so you can block and report, just say the word and i’ll dm you a list

These posts are cousins to me.

Full image, baby soldiers having a snooze. For the friends who don't use X ^^

apparently one of the ways to say "shaved my head" in Japanese is "頭を坊主にした" which is literally something like "did the monk thing to my head"

I’m so glad tumblr doesn’t tell you the amount of users who have seen your post because the thought of being perceived scares me

To the woolies worker who stoped me today to tell me they also listened to Ghost after they saw my Ghost hoodie, I want you to know that I think your really pretty and I hope the Christmas season has been treating you well

you knock on my door and hear loud barking and scrambling noises and me yelling "no!! down boy!! down!!!" and then when i open the door there is a single crab on the floor