Me, A Purse Snatcher: Why Is Everyone Carrying Around Breadsticks

I’m handing out full plates of “shut the fuck up” tonight.

SNL saw people saying we shouldn’t joke about Trump right now and said, “Noted. Here’s 10 different Trump COVID jokes,” and I truly love that for them.

my law teacher built a ten foot fence because he hated his neighbour, but the city made him take it down because theres a five foot limit on fences, so he poured five feet of concrete on the ground and then built a five foot fence on top of that and the city tried suing him because it was ten feet but they lost because the actual fence was only five

Use the see-saw as a scale first with 6 men on both sides. The side that goes up easier and stays up has the lighter man. Take that side and then split them up into 3 and 3, and again use the see-saw to determine which group has the lighter man. Once you have it down to a the lighter group of 3 take two from the group and use the see-saw as the scale, if one of these two is lighter than he is the lighter man, if they can balance than the remaining member of the group of 3 is the lighter man.

“There are 12 men on an island. 11 weigh exactly the same amount, but one of them is slightly lighter or heavier. You must figure out which. The island has no scales, but there is a see-saw. The exciting catch? You can only use it three times.”

GO!

?

When you’re the only one that doesn’t get the joke.

everyone always talks about the wendys twitter, but

let’s talk about moonpie’s twitter