Mum: Can You-

everything can be magical if you let it be. i remember the first time seeing red-winged blackbirds i was just…enthralled. i watched them for maybe an hour. i thought they made the sweetest noises and were just so pretty. and i found out later on that people consider them nuisances and pests. they’re literally common all over the united states but because they weren’t familiar to me they weren’t a burden or an annoyance but something beautiful. if we don’t let other people tell us how to feel about things, maybe we can just like things for what they are

today you, tomorrow me.

when you finish a paper just before the deadline and have no time to edit

the other day I was taking a walk when I saw this old guy trapped under a cart. people were trying to help him but it was too heavy so I stepped forward and lifted it off him (I work out a lot.) then, this old police inspector told me I had to be a convict because of how strong I was. I looked him straight in the eye and said, “it’s 1815. anyone can be strong, including non felons, women, and gay people. the only person who’s weak here is you.” he started crying and gave me fifty crowns while everyone clapped, even the nuns

take everything i say with a hint of lime

I present to you, literally my favorite yelp review at the SmartPet I used to work at. It’s called CLOSING for a reason people

It’s so cold outside I just saw a picture of a scarf on my timeline and whispered “need me a freak like that” out loud.

This picture i took of hector while i was drunk last night looks like a damn renaissance painting