Please Tell Me No One Beat Me To This Joke

Strange things happen to people that don’t drink Wilkins.

This beautiful girl is  Pseudophyllus titan  Because of course she is.  Stunning specimen! (if you wanna see previous finds, just check out my #beestiary tag!)

there is no difference between coke, pepsi, doctored pepper, sprites, ginger’s ale, root’s beered, mountain do, all of them. theyre all exactly the same.

i’m just…going to leave these here

I went to the farmer’s market yesterday and at the honey guy’s booth and there were all these bees just hangin out.  Checking out the beeswax tabs, floating around the honey jars, not being aggressive, just really gentle and investigating or something

and as he was giving me a sample of the wildflower honey one of them landed on his hand and he just took a drop from the jar and dabbed it on his hand for the bee, and when I asked if they were his bees he said “No, but they show up every time I come out, I think they just know my truck” and this guy is well-known among the local bees and lets them sit on his hand and eat his honey and I just really like the bee guy

u know what my biggest pet peeve is? when someone is like genuinely very mean to others and when they’re called out on their behavior they’re like “sorry i’m just a bitch xoxo” like yes u sure are!!!!! not something u should be proud of

a body count not as in homicide nor as in sexuality but as in the trail of people from my childhood and adolescence i should’ve been a better friend to and taken better care of but i was too busy being caught up in my own heartache to recognize their own and therefore our relationship tapered off in an extremely unsatisfying way that continuously manifests itself as a thrumming sense of grief in my chest. anyway which restaurant chains have the best free pre-meal bread?

i accidentally an entire coke bottle