This Guy Is So Great

getting up at 6 am by choice: wow what a beautiful sunrise! the house is so peaceful and quiet. i feel really tired but i don't have to do anything but just sit here and enjoy the morning. what a pleasant feeling

getting up at 6 am because you have to: these covers draped upon my mortal coil have become the dirt above my casket. my corpse refuses to unsettle the earth to rise from its grave. i have been dead for centuries and have no intentions to assimilate once more into the tragic world of the living

*wakes up at 9* nice

*immediately falls asleep, wakes up at noon* less nice

does Trump think that Hillary, as a Senator, had the power to pass whatever laws she wanted by herself……..does he know how the Senate works…..

Oh hello! Look, I just made you this film right now, it’s called DOUBLE KING and it’s for you, here you go!

Beyonce literally took in oxygen and exhaled carbon dioxide. She literally turned. A. Gas. Into. A. Different. Gas. I don’t think yall understand that Literally no one has ever done that before.

Thanks dungeons and dragons for teaching me how to spell and correctly incorporate Cool Words into my vocabulary such as constitution, proficiency, dexterity, prestidigitation, initiative, and expeditious

what

I asked my boyfriend in Canada once, how he deals with polar bears because I was curious about what to do and he was like, just be calm, let them know you’re there, and give them space and they’ll usually just go away. 

Keira Knightley when she’s offered projects that take place in modern day society