❛ If It’s All In My Head , Tell Me Now . Tell Me I’ve Got It Wrong
❛ if it’s all in my head , tell me now . tell me i’ve got it wrong . ❜ xoxo luka
( tswift lyrics / accepting !! )
𝐋𝐔𝐊𝐀 𝐂𝐎𝐔𝐅𝐅𝐀𝐈𝐍𝐄 𝐈𝐒 𝐓𝐇𝐄 𝐖𝐎𝐑𝐒𝐓 𝐁𝐎𝐘 𝐒𝐇𝐄'𝐒 𝐄𝐕𝐄𝐑 𝐌𝐄𝐓, and if that sounds like a sentiment she's had before it's because it is and it's true. Only the most rotten boy in all of Paris would corner her on her way home from school and confront her about things she definitely does not want to face or even speak into existence. Not that this is the first time he's called her out, nor will it stop him from doing so again, she thinks.
( Their encounter in the park, when he'd outright asked if she had a crush on him still haunts her at night. )
He's the worst; especially because he doesn't even do it out of ill intentions. There is no accusation in his eyes. He isn't belittling her, which she would have found more bearable because then, at least, her anger would have been justified. It's worse than that. He's being honest and forthright, bold in a way that she has never been. She's only confident when she's being mean and snarky. Only able to showcase bravado when she's using others as a stepping stone, but Luka never falls for any of that. He never has. It's like he looks right past all of it, peels back the layers, until he just sees her. It makes her skin crawl and her face flush in equal measure. The only victory she feels in this moment is that his words give the impression he's been thinking about her as much as she's been thinking about him and that... certainly does something to her heart rate.
It could be a trap, her mind hisses. He's waiting for an answer, and it'd be a lie to say she doesn't have reservations. If she tells him the truth, she's opening herself up in a way she's only ever confided in Adrien. He could laugh at her. Tell her how ridiculous she is for thinking he'd ever return her feelings. And it would be a completely justified rejection. Chloé knows she hasn't been the best person, and though she's been trying to make amends, she doesn't always get it right. The thought of being rejected makes her want to scream. She deals with enough of that from her mother. She doesn't need to deal with it at school, too, where her social circle is already treading on a knife's edge. The only consolation prize is that he's an upperclassman. If he rejects her now, at least she never has to sit in the same classroom as him.
There's still a respectable distance between them, but when he suddenly places his hand on her shoulder, she's catapulted back to the present. It takes considerable effort to reel in the knee-jerk reaction to slap his hand away for touching her. Old Chloé would say he's wrinkling her designer sweater, but she's trying to be a different person. A better one. His face is still calm, but if she squints, she thinks she can detect a hint of nervousness. Well. At least she's not alone in that.
Chloé inhales, squeezing her eyes shut.
❝ You're... not wrong. There. Happy? Go ahead. Laugh it up! ❞
More Posts from Jauneilles and Others
💋 ♡ @chataclysmic your choice of adrien or chat
( let chloé kiss your muse / accepting !! )
𝐒𝐇𝐄 𝐂𝐀𝐍'𝐓 𝐐𝐔𝐈𝐓𝐄 𝐑𝐄𝐂𝐀𝐋𝐋 𝐖𝐇𝐄𝐍 𝐈𝐓 𝐒𝐓𝐀𝐑𝐓𝐄𝐃, only that she had suddenly grown accustomed to Chat Noir's near-nightly visits. On the nights when she wasn't patrolling with one of the other Miraculous holders as Queen Bee, she'd sit out on her balcony and wait. Like clockwork, he'd show up. He never stayed too long; only a few minutes as he did his own patrols with Ladybug, but she liked the company. Some part of her wondered if he only checked in on her to make sure she didn't betray them all. It wouldn't have surprised her if that were the case.
Chloé had done herself little favours in fostering trust with her teammates. Between her tumultuous emotions, which resulted in either herself or someone else getting Akumtaised, and the number of awful things she had said and done over the years, she could hardly blame any of them for being cautious around her. But Ladybug trusted her enough to be Queen Bee again. And they all trusted Ladybug. So. For now, Chloé was an ally.
She was determined, this time, not to mess it up.
They had been talking for a while. Idle chatter that filled the void. Chat Noir was surprisingly easy to talk to, once she got past all of his annoying puns and flirtations. Chloé found herself opening up more and more, despite how little she actually knew about her teammate. But the little she did know, the little that he did reveal — sometimes on purpose, other times perhaps without realising it — she filed away for safekeeping. Kept them as clues to a puzzle that was slowly, but surely, beginning to take shape.
She had her suspicions.
❝ You know, this is totally unfair. ❞ She watched Chat carefully from his perch on her balcony railing, and when he didn't say anything, she barrelled on unperturbed. ❝ It's just... you know who I am. But I know so little about you. The real you, I mean. ❞
She could see his mind working, trying to come up with an excuse. A reasonable explanation for his reticence; but Chloé already knew the why. It was the same reason why Ladybug and Chat Noir hadn't known each other's identities for so long. And the only reason she even knew that much was because Marinette had told her. Marinette trusted her.
If she were still her old self, she might have taken this opportunity to be nasty and mean about his secrets. She hated keeping secrets and she hated people keeping them from her. But that was old Chloé, and she wasn't going to be that manipulative, self-serving person anymore.
Chat didn't say anything, but she noticed how his posture had shifted. Less self-assured as he folded in on himself, arms wrapping around his middle. She'd seen that posture before. Knew of someone else who did the same thing when they were upset. Chloé pursed her lips, took a deep breath, and plunged.
❝ Adrien... ❞ She was careful not to react when he did. Her eyes had averted, her gaze forward and resolute. She felt, more than saw, him jolt next to her. As if he'd been electrocuted. Gotcha. ❝ Adrien sits like that too, when he's upset. Or when he feels alone. He thinks I don't notice, but I do. I just... I don't know how to help him. ❞ Chloé made a show of yawning and stepped back from the balcony. ❝ I haven't been a very good friend to him in recent years, but... I'm trying to do better. And I would hope he knows he can always talk to me. About anything. Anyway... it's late. You should get back to patrol. ❞
Chloé turned, but instead of going back inside she stepped towards him. With more confidence than she actually felt, she planted a kiss on his cheek, just under the bottom of his mask.
❝ ——But that does go for you, too. I hope you know I'm here to listen if you need someone. I-I know I'm not Ladybug, but... well, goodnight, Chat Noir. ❞
𝒕𝒊𝒌𝒌𝒊, 𝒔𝒑𝒐𝒕𝒔 𝒐𝒏!
#𝐘𝐈𝐍𝐁𝐔𝐆 is a new independent, selective, mutuals-only, series-based roleplay blog for Marinette Dupain-Cheng, aka 𝐋𝐀𝐃𝐘𝐁𝐔𝐆 of Zagtoon’s 𝐌𝐈𝐑𝐀𝐂𝐔𝐋𝐎𝐔𝐒 𝐋𝐀𝐃𝐘𝐁𝐔𝐆 franchise, as charmed by 𝐂𝐄𝐂𝐄! I'd appreciate if you could give this post a ↺ if you're interested in following to help me find people to follow!
some quick portrayal notes!
this blog is considered canon-divergent past season three. this for two reasons: one, i haven't finished the show ( i am currently on s4 ) so if i get any information wrong or make headcanons that later may or may not be retconned, this is why; and two, i plan to explore a redemption arc for chloe because we were robbed of one.
in line with both @yinbug and @yangnoir's portrayals, the timeline between s1-s5 does not happen in the span of a few months. chloe is 13 at the time of origins, 14 through season one, 15 through two and three, and 16 through four and five. this will make her sixteen in my main verse.
chloe is a closeted bisexual/biromantic. a lot of this has to do with the status of her family. her father being a politician and her mother being toxic at best, chloe fears how she ( and by proxy, her parents ) may be perceived if she openly admits to having feelings for girls as well as boys. image is everything in her family, and chloe doesn't want to tarnish that — at least not when it comes to her romantic/sexual identity, so she definitely struggles with some internalised fears of rejection.
part of the exploration of chloe's redemption will include her focusing more keenly on her ballet. thus far she has been practising it for eight years and takes pointe classes, though it didn't become a very serious interest until she began to realise she needed to turn her life around. the discipline and focus needed in ballet, and especially pointe, gives chloe a much needed outlet for her frustrations and anger.
this will probably be expanded on/added to as i make my way through s4 and s5.
i sign in. i post one thing. i disappear again for three months.
✏
( muse meme / accepting !! )
catty noir , monster high. i haven't kept up with the rebooted lore at all, so this one probably won't happen but i loved the boo york movie even if it's super cheesy — but let's face it, the entire series is cheesy. anyway, i just think it would hilarious to throw her into the mlb universe. what's worse than one chat noir? two.
all four of our names lit up at once as we all badly singing along to chat's song at the same time really is just iconic actually.
i realized the other day that i haven’t really talked all that much about the last handful of episodes of season 5 and haven’t really touched on the ending of chloe’s story at all. and i really only see people who are upset about it talk about her last few scenes so i do want to offer an alternative take on it, which is basically: to me, chloe’s story ended in tragedy. i don’t really care what astruc has said on twitter or what was leaked in bibles or scripts. i’m looking at the story we actually got, the one that ended with this moment.
does marinette tell her off right before this? yes. and this should be a moment of victory for marinette, right? she’s finally free from chloe, in every way.
but we don’t see marinette after this. this is the last shot of marinette in the episode before it cuts to chloe’s reaction. marinette’s face is still there, but only as the contact image on chloe’s phone. marinette herself is gone. the rest of the episode only shows us chloe and lila. from here on out, we are not in marinette’s story. we’re in theirs.
and it’s here, when we move out of marinette’s story, that we see chloe’s is tragedy. chloe is the villain in marinette’s story and the victim in her own. this is not just about protagonist centered morality, though that plays a role. it’s about not just whose side the story takes but also what marinette is allowed to know and see. marinette only ever gets the smallest glimpse of chloe’s home life and family, but as the viewers we get to see more. and it is after marinette dismisses her and hangs up in revolution that chloe stops being a part of marinette’s story, and, in that moment, loses the role of the villain. freed from marinette’s story, we see her alone, sobbing, because she’s left with only her own story, where she is the victim.
and it’s notable that chloe tried to reject that story. she chooses marinette’s story, again and again. that’s why she called marinette in the end. chloe would rather play the villain. calling sabrina, asking for comfort, would be accepting that she’s a victim, which chloe isn’t ready for. unfortunately, marinette doesn’t give her a choice: marinette’s story doesn’t have room for chloe anymore. she’s fought her demons and has new ones to face. the only role left for chloe to play in marinette’s story is the girl ladybug couldn’t save.
so yeah, this ending is tragic. and i genuinely hurt for chloe in that moment. but i never once thought we were supposed to see her as unredeemable or celebrate her being sent off to her mother. i don’t know what the story plans to do with chloe next - whether she’s gone for good or she’ll come back worse or come back better. but i know this moment, by taking us out of marinette’s perspective, asked us to sympathize with a girl suffering at the end of her downward spiral.
