As I Sat In The Dark, Eating Strawberries And Nutella On Toast, Watching The Lighting Roll Outside My

Pencil drawing of Jinx because I am now obsessed with Arcane. She does look strange without color 😔

Sobbing. I need to be needed. I need the intimacy of it. Let me worship you

“I have always loved too much, or not enough.”

— Dorianne Laux

I need more angry Merlin! I need Merlin to accidentally reveal his magic, expecting Arthur to lash out and feel betrayed. I need Arthur to tell Merlin he knew the whole time. I need Merlin to pause, to process what he just said. I need Merlin to realize what he's sacrificed to keep his secret while Arthur let him. I need Merlin to be the one to lash out and tell him this. I need Merlin to be the one to feel betrayed. Arthur knew and he let Merlin continue to lie to him and believe that Arthur hated him. Arthur didn't tell him he knew all in the name of "trust" and "letting Merlin decide when it was best to tell him". I need Merlin to break down at this. How could Arthur not realize how much it hurt Merlin to lie!? How could he be okay with the betrayal while not processing the consequences of that betrayal!? For a good cause or not!? I need Merlin to scream.

Recently I've noticed some parallels recently between Stanly Pines and Dean Winchester. The two families in general really.

Two close brothers and one extra brother and a judgemental emotionally abusive father.

Two brothers, one who takes care of the other even though he has his own problems, the other brother who used to appreciate it but begins to take it for granted.

The favorite son who doesn't see that he's the favorite son and only cares about getting out. The brother who leaves for college, who leaves his brother without looking back.

The other brother, who works so hard for the approval of his father, works hard to protect his family, but can never seem to do anything right. The muscle. The heart.

(Sorry if this doesn't make sense. It's Dean-Stan, Sam-Ford, Adam-Shermie, and the fathers.)

I like that Gravity Falls is getting a Marauders style redemption arc. It's all about Ford and Stan and Fiddleford and Bill with hints of boyish Dan and Young Lazy Susan and I love it. I love it. The multishiping the major angst the character exploration. 10/10

I have no one to talk about this with, but I am so thankful for the bbno$ Jayvik cosplay stream crew and the distraction from other events of today (cries in American) that they provided. Made my day 1000x better.

Somebody please write this fic I'm crying that it doesn't exist! Red is Arthur and Blue is Merlin. One-shot or long fic idc! Just pleaseeeee!!! And if anyone does write it please tag me here or on Ao3! My Ao3 is Actually_Icarus

Please and thank you!!!