Dog Owners Please Be Aware.

Oh, ahahaha, and then this last photo I took.

This is the young master taking my phone away just as I take a picture, so the picture turned out all blurry. But I still adore this picture even if it is blurry because, well, memories!

Sebastian: Demons don't have family.

Also Sebastian: (scrolling through his phone) And this is my young master taking his first soul, and this is my young master threatening the king, and this is Finny picking a flower, and this is Baldroy burning down the kitchen, and this is Mey Rin breaking every piece of china we had left, and...

....oh gosh i’m alois aren’t i

help

If Kuro was set in the 21st century you know Alois would be using those glitter gel pens

Ciel: *on Children’s day* where the hell’s my happy children’s day, you damn demon dad-mom-grandparent--

Sebastian : *on Father's day*... 🥺 nothing to say young master ? (Ciel *sigh* : gnmhappy father's day sebastian...)

Sebastian : *on Mother's day* … 🥺 young master ?

Sebastian : *on Grandparent's day*... 🥺 ?

Sebastian talking about Ciel to some random person in line:

*cracks knuckles*

short, wears jewelry, sweet tooth, DOGS, resting bitch face, can NOT dance, bookworm, Ciel’s ‘;-;’ face, serving Looks since 1875, gender who, no spice tolerance, uwu babey, introvert, needs a hug.

oh gosh uh help i’m ciel aren’t i *grabs calligraphy brush and just splats it over half of the bingo board*

Me: BONGO Sebastian: It’s BINGO. Me: HANDS OFF ME, DEMON

(yes that was a spongebob reference, leave me alone)

I JUST SNORT-LAUGHED SO DAMN VIOLENTLY--

Finny, at 3AM: If you work on a farm and your job is to take care of chickens, you are a chicken tender.

Baldroy: *eyes wide, staring at the ceiling*

Bard: So I can either bake these cookies at 400 degrees for 10 minutes or 4,000 degrees for 1 minute.

Sebastian: bard nO THAT’S NOT HOW YOU BAKE COOKIES FRIEND

Bard:  FLOOR IT?

Sebastian: BARD NO

Bard: HOW ABOUT 4,000,000 DEGREES FOR 1 SECOND

Sebastian: BARD YOU ARE GOING TO BURN YOUR HOUSE DOWN

Bard: I’M GOING TO HARNESS THE FUCKING SUN TO MAKE COOKIES

Sebastian: BARD P L E A S E

Reblogging for Beast’s Birthday!

Happy Birthday! ^o^

Happy Birthday

Beast (22nd May 1864)

Black Butler

“Sebastian, I can see you’re stressed. You’re pouring milk into the dehumidifier “

“Ah shit”

^^^^^

THIS

THIS MADE ME LAUGH

Gaylebastian part 7

Sebastian: All right, Ciel, everything’s looking good for the luncheon today. I have some real heavy hitter’s for my bull pen. I’m talking grapes the size of B-cups, a ham roast that could feed a lion pride for a calendar month. I’ve got a calzone that’s so big, it registered as a passenger in my car and the unbuckled seatbelt alarm kept going off, so I had to buckle it in and then live with the shame of looking like a calzone chauffeur

Sebastian: The one thing that isn’t complete is my pièce de résistance, the dessert: my golden-brown crusted, piping-hot, jacked-up apple pie. The only way I can achieve the crunchiest, crispiest crust is if I cook it ten minutes before company arrives. So I’m leaving it till the last minute

Ciel: Sebastian, I can see you’re stressed. You’re pouring milk into the dehumidifier

Sebastian: Ah shit

Sebastian: Look, it doesn’t matter. We can’t cook this baby until ten minutes before company arrives, because I’m serving this thing PIPIN’ HOT

Ciel: Don’t you think that’s cutting it a little close?

Sebastian: I’m an adrenaline junkie, son, I need the rush, but I’ll admit these are stressful times

— the next day on the ride to school —

Ciel: So are we just not gonna talk about your luncheon—

Sebastian: My luncheon was terrific.

Ciel: You can’t be serious

Sebastian: I think my luncheon was lovely, son.

Ciel: I heard you describing it to Agni as “elegant and fun”—

Sebastian: Elegant and fun, that’s correct, which it was. Wouldn’t you say it was elegant and fun?

Ciel: Which part, when you screamed “I’m simply one hell of a host” while juggling all of our knives, or when you let forty-six of your cats swarm the dining room?

Sebastian: 

Sebastian: Both

Ciel: Also, remind me, why is the Bose player in the back seat?

Sebastian: … I need to get it repaired at media services after I drop you off

Ciel: Mhm. And how did it break?

Sebastian: The volume… somehow got… maxed out or something. I don’t really know

Ciel: Uh-huh. Might that have been from you blaring Andrea Bocelli at the maximum volume for upwards of seven minutes?

Sebastian: Oh look, it’s your school. Have a smart day, son

Ciel: Yeah, bye

On the orders of their respective masters, Sebastian and Claude perform the song "Anything You Can Do, I Can Do Better." Sebastian throws himself into his part; Claude merely states his lines with all the excitement one might use while reading the telephone book.

Sebastian busts out an embroidered silk waistcoat, sparkly eyeliner, and his high-heeled eldritch boots for the occasion. He’d never turn down an opportunity to bask in the spotlight, and he hasn’t had this much fun since performing for the Noah’s Ark circus! For “I can sing anything higher than you,” he hits a note so far up in the stratosphere that he shatters a tower of wine glasses, before elegantly reassembling them, and his dulcet tones on “I can sing anything sweeter than you” bring birds flocking to the manor to listen to the demon’s mellifluous voice. Meanwhile, Claude’s recitation is delivered in a monotone that makes William T. Spears seem chipper by comparison. The spider demon is mightily annoyed at being dragged into this because he was busy knitting a cozy new blanket for His Highness when the boys insisted on this idiotic competition, and now he has to watch Michaelis showing off. 😒 The things he does for his smol human ward. *sigh*

Although Alois berates Claude for his lack of enthusiasm, the Trancy boy is delighted by the little production, clapping and cheering throughout (he’s a musical theatre kid at heart), especially when Claude finally caves and does his tap dance routine at the end. O!Ciel rolls his eyes at Sebastian’s antics, though he might be a tiny bit proud of his dad for representing the Phantomhive household well (shhh…don’t tell Sebastian, though. He’s insufferable enough already).

(Later on, Claude finishes that blanket, which is covered in a pattern of pretty blue butterflies, and smiles when Alois exclaims that he loves it. There are some things only a Trancy butler can do. 🕷)