Klarion Joins In Cuz It’s Hilarious

Lindir (signing up for the Musican Guild and being a nervous mess): Can I bring a friend during tryouts?

Elf in charge: Of course! After all it looks like you need all the emotional support you can get!

Next Day -

Elf in charge: Lord Elrond are you here to evaluate the tryouts ?

Elrond (sitting in the front row): Oh no I’m just here for my friend.

Elf in charge (expecting someone really important): who?

Elrond: Lindir

Elf in charge: Wait What?!?!

Lindir (goes on stage)

Elrond: Your doing great sweetie!!!

DC verse Theater 4

“So what there’s just a universe out there where Tim and Jason are best friends or something?”

It was confusing and Konner wasn’t sure how Tim could ever forgive Jason what he’d done in Titans Tower but ….

“Pppfftt. Best friends? This is the multiverse we are talking about! Here I’ll show you some funny ones to lighten the mood!”

Dick felt relieved, two videos in and he wanted to shake his family members. It was nice that Jason and Tim were friends tho, he wanted his brothers to be brothers to each other! He did! But it also left his mouth with a bitter feeling. What is wrong with him?

The scene started with Jason, this one was wearing a suit! No white in his hair to be seen.

Bruce felt something in his chest loosen at the sight.

Jason wrinkled his nose in disgust.

[“- cost Lexcorp hundreds of thousands of dollars in-“] some lawyer aspoused before being cut off.

[“You know what I don’t care if Tim murdered his entire family. Tim is like a son to me.”]

Cass dropped her popcorn, wow just wow.

Konner wrapped his arms around the shorter boy, he was crying.

…

[“Did you really mean that Jason?”]

Tim’s mind was screaming, of course he didn’t mean it. He couldn’t he hates you. Your real dad didn’t want you, Bruce didn’t want you, why would you Robin want you?

[“Of course Tim. Your parents were assholes anyway.” ]

The pit in Jason burned, “So what if I hadn’t died I would have adopted the brat? If I hadn’t died I would be working at Wayne tech and everything would have been all better?” What fucking bullshit.

And what did his counter part mean about Tim’s parents being assholes? Tim was some rich kid who had parent that gave him everything and he still became Robin.

Roy gave him a nudge, “Whatever.”

The next clip played.

Xxxx

[“Tim your parents were extremely neglectful.”]

Jason froze.

[ “No they weren’t.”]

Konner pursed his lips, even after all these years Tim was still in denial.

[“Tim they left you alone for 11 months out of the year.”]

“Well at least they didn’t do that in our dimension!” Dick tried to break the ice, they couldn’t have done that. Not to Timmy, Bruce would have known. He would have known and he wouldn’t have let Tim go back to them.

“Tim?”

“What it’s not a big deal?”

Bruce felt like he had been slapped. No no no no. Jack and Janet weren’t the best people he knew that but they wouldn’t have…Tim had told him it was okay that they called and visited and that he had a nanny and and Tim was a liar. Bruce knew he knew and there was no more telling himself Tim hadn’t lied to him. There was no more space left to say he had actually believed him ethier. Bruce knew.

Xxx Next clip

[“No body is shooting my brother! Imma say this one time you make a move at him and you’ll be dead before you hit the ground you understand!”]

“Tt what mess did Drake get himself into know?” Damian was a tad affronted about this. So it would seem that in these worlds Drake and Todd were close. Tt, well it made sense. Todd hated anyone who hurt kids and it would seem Drake didn’t have the sparkling childhood he had thought he did.

[ I’m feeling untouchable, untouchable]

Roy couldn’t help but chuckle, “Look at how smug he is that you have his back.” Jason rolled his eyes, he did that here too. Sure he didn’t say anything about it but … it’s not like he still had a hit out on him anymore.

Kyle is a Parallax apologist.

And so is more than half of the universe.

That’s it.

Earth needs to get with the program before another planet decides to keep Hal and give him the love he deserves.

Someone write this!!! Tag me pls

Hey, what if when Freakshows staff and control on the Ghosts in his circus broke and all the Ghosts (but Lydia who seems to be loyal to that clown) ran off, what if two ghosts stayed behind to thank the two teens (Danny and Sam) for freeing them. And maybe ask the Ghost boy a small favor to relay a message to their still living son.

What if those two were The Flying Graysons, John and Mary. (They did die tragically and I wouldn’t put it passed Freakshow to try to take control of the best of the best circus preformers)

What if when they follow Danny after he flies Sam and himself to safety.

What if they see him detransform into his human half and are struck with how much Danny looks like their son.

Is he related to the Graysons? Idk. Could Danny be a long lost son in this AU? Maybe? We could always make him Dick’s unknown son if we want. Just throwing out ideas rn. Any work.

Tag me pls this is great

Part one

Out of all the things Jazz was proficient in, motorcycle riding was not one of them. Decent was how she would describe herself. She knew how to drive them well enough to drive fast and not crash into things, but she was nowhere near a bat's level. No fancy tricks, jumps, or maneuvers for her on this thing. It didn’t help that her recent mode of transportation was a more spooky presence.

Jazz zipped down Gotham's street on her stolen bike, Red Hood gaining behind her on the batbike. Taking a left, she let out a whistle.

Jazz passed a bar maneuvering around a drunk pedestrian that had wandered onto the road.

Red Hood drew up next to her on her right, and she took the next left. He overshot the turn and went down a parallel street.

Taking another left, she went down the ramp onto the gothams main highway. She let out another whistle. Come on, she wanted off this bike.

Spoilers purple bike zipped onto the highway with Red Hood next to her.

Great, now there were two of them.

"I could use some backup." Jazz barked.

"I'm on your sixth," Dani answered, "and I brought a friend."

In a review mirror, Jazz spotted the green frame of Cujo's giant form catching up to Red Hood. She didn't see Dani anywhere, but the young halfa could be flying invisible.

Cujo plucked RedHood off his bike by the scruff of his jacket. The canine skittered to a halt, and Jazz soon lost sight of them over the next bend in the road.

"Cujo pin." Dani commanded the ghost dog.

A yellow bike jumped down from an overpass, and Jazz swerved on to an exit to avoid crashing. Spoiler pulled up beside her as Red Robin joined the party on her other side.

Red Robin turned into her, and she had to take a turn to avoid crashing. She felt like they were herding her. She increased her speed and pulled ahead of the vigilantes.

"T I could use some guidance here."

Sam answered, "Take the next right."

Jazz did, her shoulder protesting at the hair pin turn, "Why are you answering?" Spoiler missed the turn, and Signal took her place, pushing Jazz to make another turn.

"T's busy. The hacker eating through his fire walls like they're potatoe chips. Go left, then ver right."

As Jazz did, Signal's bike slowed down to a stop and turned off.

Dani snickered, "Signal is gonna be out of the race. I took his keys."

Spoiler rejoined and, working intandom with Red Robin, ushered Jazz down a narrow alleyway. The two vigilantes slowed down to flank their quarry. Nightwing sat on the other end, and Jazz realized the trap she was in.

Damn it, they had been herding her.

She let go of the throttle, not willing to make a complete stop but also not willing to barrel in to the guy.

This was the kind of situation she was trying to avoid. Even with the training from Frightnight, Pandora, and Frostbite, not to mention the basic combat training from her mom, Jazz wasn't confident she could take a bat let alone three of them.

She mentality debated if diplomacy could be given a shot. Sure, she just b&r the batcave, but even in the current situation, she didn't believe that any of them were true villains. She needed the information on the thumbdrive before she made that decision.

She tossed the thoughts aside when she saw the dark silhouette with two pairs of glowing white eyes approach behind Nightwing. Jazz twisted the throttle. The bike snarled as it surged under her.

Maybe Nightwing saw something in his peripheral vision or one his comrades called out. He turned just in time to see the spooky horse clamp its sharp fanged mouth over the rear fender. It dragged the bike back. Nightwing had to jump off as the horse reared, thrashing its four front legs and lifting the bike completely off the ground.

Jazz shot through the opening. Tossing its head, the horse let go, sending the bike flying into a wall. As Spoiler and Red Robin passed, it kicked out, smashing a headlight on one and denting the other. It charged after them. It snapped at Red Robin, getting in between the bird and Jazz.

"Little sister, can you take the wheel?" Jazz asked as the horses back leveled up to her.

"Yeah."

"Guy's stick to code names. Tec thinks our coms have been hacked," Sam ordered.

"Seriously?" asked Dani. "What happened to 'they're good but I'm better?'"

"I was wrong." Tucker cried as the bike steadied from Dani posseing it, "I had to shut off everything to stop them."

Throwing a leg over to the other side, Jazz let go of the bike handle bars. She curled into a crouch and visually judged the distance and height difference between the bike and draft sized horse creature.

Was she really going to do this?

She jumped plenty of times on this horse before. But that was from the ground or in the ghost zone, where falling off didn't matter. Not speeding down Gotham at a neckbreak speed.

Taking a steading breath, she coiled her legs and sprung. Her stomach hit the side of the horse, and she hooked her arms over its broad back. She pulled herself up, bracing with one arm, and attempted to swing a leg over. Her shoulder gave out. She yelped, hanging haphazardly with one arm.

For one terrifying moment, Jazz thought she would fall. Then, her belt tightened and lifted with a painful pinching sensation on her lower back. She turned to see her horse biting her belt.

With its help, she managed to scramble onto its back. She panted, letting a shudder run through her as she laid on the horse's back.

She was fine.

Everything was fine.

Sure, she was facing the wrong way, but it was fine. Anything other than falling onto the road or crashing was fine.

Jazz lifted her head, and her gaze met BlackBat's. Briefly wondering when the bat showed up, Jazz straightened up into a sitting position. Looking around, Jazz saw that Spoiler and Red Robin had disappeared.

"Oh shit," Tucker gasped, "oh shit that's Batman. We're dead. We're dead. We're so- ouch."

Sam hissed, "Clam down, he hasn't spotted us."

"Are you guys okay?" Jazz frowned when they didn't answer. She pressed on her com, "Tec? Sponsor?"

"We're fine." Sam answered in a barley audible vioce.

Jazz spun around and caught sight of Wayne Enterprise, "My exit ETA?"

"One minute."

Jazz kicked her heels. The horse picked up speed, pulling farther head. "Come on boy, get us up that building."

Jazz threw her arms around the horse's neck, hugging it tightly as it lept onto Wayne Enterprise, running straight up the side of the building.

Blackbat scuttled to a stop at the building.

A grappling hook deployed. It hooked on piont way above Jazz, and BlackBat's bike began its ascent up the building. Spoiler and Red Robin were still nowhere in sight, but Jazz had a feel they where some where near by.

Windows and dark rooms blurred by as they raced up the building. As Jazz reached the building's spire, a green electricity crackled overhead, tearing a portal to the ghost zone. Jazz's horse didn't hesitate to climb the spire. With one power push from its legs, the horse jumped into the portal.

They landed on a floating asteroid. Jazz scratched her mount's neck. It leaned in to the touch, giving a happy nicker. "Good job," she maneuvered her mount to around and stared into the portal.

Blackbat stared grimly back at her.

"Remix, are you with me?" Jazz asked.

"Yeah," Dani answered. Jazz jerked and hissed as a tiny invisible hand toched her bad shoulder. "Sorry, what happened?"

"Red hood shot me. I'll be fine." Before Jazz could be pressed further about it, she called, "Sponsor, Tec, you guys clear?"

The ghost zone portal closed, and Dani became viable as they waited for a response. Jazz called for them again.

"Where fine," Tucker finally answered, "Robin almost got us when Sa-Sponsor knocked over a vase, but where fine. Met for hot chocolate?"

"Met for hot chocolate," Jazz confirmed. She took out her coms and offered it to her horse, "Here boy."

The horse turned it's head and took them. It munched them like they were fine oats and not ecto gadgets.

"I need to see a dragon about some makeup remover." Jazz said, taking off her wig and shaking out her hair. She couldn't believe that it stayed on through all that. She made a mental note to herself to never doubt Dora's costume or makeup skills again. The glamor on Jazz's face alone saved her more than she could say with Red Hood. "Do you want to come with me or go straight to the far frozen?"

Dani offered her own coms to the horse, "I'll come with. I haven't seen Dora in a while."

Enter Dani stage left !

Corpse au my beloved

So Danny is currently living in Gotham because Clockwork said so. But since it’s Gotham he got shot should’ve died but instead just kept walking. The thing is a certain professional henchman who shot him also saw him just walk away. So the rumors are starting to spread about a child who cheated death but for a while it’s fine because no one believes it. But like a week later the same thing happened in front of a bunch henchmen, rogues, and bats. Now it’s a race to find Danny, some rogues just want see how Danny was doing it, others like joker just want to see if there was a way to kill him, while Batman just wants to find him to protect him, and Alfred is already preparing a room. No success until one night some cop discovers a pit filled dozens of same corpse. And that changes everything.

DC-Verse Theater part 3

“Alrighty next clip is a sibling universe of this universe so again most things are the same as yours with some slight differences.”

Damian’s eyes narrowed as he tried to spy on her phone with Jon in between them, “What kind of differences.”

“Well in this universe Jason and Bruce manage to talk some things out. A more glaring difference is that this Jason is a scientist.”

“Woah, really Jason?”

The man in question smacked the archers shoulder playfully, “Hey what that’s supposed to mean! I’m smart!”

“Yup Jason in this universe practically lives in space!”

The video started to play, “Oh also in this universe Konner doesn’t exist.”

“Wait what!” Tim was horrified, Konner nodded it made sense they couldn’t all exist every time… especially when they weren’t even born in the first place.

The scene opened on Jason and Tim in Jasons apartment kitchen. It was kinda creepy how the apartment looked exactly the same, until they kept walking. Leading them both into a room that looked like Roy’s workshop, me mechanical garbage thrown everywhere.

“I am wiped out guess I’ll turn in.”

Cass raised an eyebrow, usually they had to fight for Tim to sleep.

“Cool.”

Jason looked at the screen, huh looks like him and replacement had a good relationship here. He felt bitter about it, not that he deserved a good relationship with the replacement.

“Jay, I feel like I’ve spent my whole life pretending Bruce is a great guy and trying to be like him and the ugly truth has always been-“

Tim didn’t like were this was going, but at least him and Jason were close. Close enough for Tim to tell him things like this, real brothers.

“That he’s not that great a guy and you are exactly like him?”

“Am I evil?”

Bruce felt like his nerves were on fire, he knew he wasn’t a good man but Tim?

Damian scoffed, “As if you have the capacity to ever be Batman.”

“Actually Tim is the most like me.”

The room grew silent, as Tim hunched his shoulders. He never wanted to be Batman in the first place.

“Worse you’re smart. When you know nothing matters the universe is yours and I have never met a universe that was into it.

It was Hals turn to raise an eyebrow, “That kinda sounds like he drops into different dimensions a lot.”

Chimera smiled, “Oo! Got it in one! And people saw your the dumb one.”

The universe is basically an animal that grazes on the ordinary creates infinite idiots just to eat them not unlike your husband Brecard -“

“Bernard”

“Yeah hardly matters now sweetie.”

“I MARRIED Bernard !!!”

Konner could admit to being a little itty bit jealous.

“Jay I’m out of excuses to not be who I am … so who am I ? What do I do?”

“You’re asking Jason for advice?- ow”

“I’m asking Jason for advice? I guess we’re close …” it felt nice to know there was one world out there where his Robin liked him.

“My advice? Take off, leave Gotham before it eats you.”

“Jason!”

“What Dick! It’s not like any of you would even notice if he left and it’s obvious that this Tim isn’t happy to be there.”

“I can’t do that! The titans, Dick, my job and as much as I hate to admit it ABCs the Bachelor- “

Dick couldn’t help but feel vindicated, of course Tim wouldn’t leave. “I Knew it I knew you liked the Bachelor! We should have a movie night Tim-“

“Oh maybe Dick, I’m pretty busy.”

“Oh okay no worries Timmy.”

“I can make a clone of you.

Konner couldn’t breath.

A perfect instance of you with all of your memories an exact copy in every way. It will love and provide for the family, do your job and consume broadcast network reality tv on the same alleged ironic level you do. You could be gone a day, a week of the rest of your life with zero consequences. The moment you decide to come back I flip a switch and the clones job is done. It feels no pain, it regrets nothing, it has zero chance of going BladeRunner.”

“Konner-“

“I’m fine.” And he was he didn’t need Superman’s pity, he didn’t want it. He didn’t get to do that, he had made his choice.

“If nothing matters, why would you do that for me?”

Jason rede used to ever admit it but he actually did like replac- Tim. He liked Tim, but after everything Jason didn’t have any room left to stand on with the kid. And he had done it to himself.

“I dunno maybe you matter so little that I like you. Or maybe it makes you matter. Maybe I love you. Maybe something about the Pits. Don’t jump a gift shark in the mouth.”

Bruce took note of Pits being mentioned, at the very least maybe these videos could help him figure something’s out. They might even give him information on how to help Jason.

“I don’t know if I can do it.”

Divk smiled of course not, this was Tim. His little brother wouldn’t just leave. Not like that, he couldn’t lose a brother like that. Even if Tim was cloned he’d notice! He’s know Tim since he was eight!

“Then stay and luxuriate in a life that you can finally know you’ve chosen.

Damian scoffed, ‘chosen’ of course Drake was the only one to get a choice. Everyone else had been dragged into the Batfamily, but Drake? Drake just waltzed in like it was nothing.

My secret bonus is no matter what you choose you’re finally gonna chill the fuck out.”

Jason laughed, “Yeah Timborine fucking chill out with your identity crisis and pick a lane.”

“Okay I know what I wanna do.”

“Tim…?” Stephanie would like to believe that Tim wouldn’t but… after everything Tim had changed.

Tim folded into Konner.

Note: this is from Rick and Morty

People: oh children are just so full of imagination!!!

Me at work: please please write something for your story anything at all I am begging you

Student: nah I can’t think of anything

He can tell the story while making it all about her, Sam his one true love!

Next week, proceeds to tell a completely different story about Tucker. His other one true love XD

Batfam looks at Bruce … yeah that tracks.

Danny was enjoying himself. His new haunt was suprisingly spacious and came with lots of charges who needed protection and care.

The old butler guy, Alfred, seemed to at least have an idea of what was going on. He had been making extra food lately and leaving it out for Danny to eat in a secluded area. Danny always made sure to turn the plate invisible and sneak it back to his hidden passage panic room before he started eating.

In return, Danny made sure to do lots of chores around the manor. Intangibility and wind manipulation made dusting super easy if you knew how to use it right.

Danny also took his job as a guardian spirit seriously. He overheard the bats fighting about not wanting to be coddled on patrol and decided it was best to let them handle themselves outside of the manor. Danny himself hated when people stuck thier noses into his business.

Jazz had screwed him over countless times with her good intentions.

But the manor was different. This was his new haunt after his old one kicked him out. This family had invited him in whether they knew it or not. Also, since the Fentons and GIW don't exist in this world, they'd have a hell of a time kicking him out.

It's best not to let it come to that. So Danny had to make these people love him the way Amity Park never did.

The Wayne's however are rather dense. You would think them being the worlds greatest detectives would mean something, but they kept silently blaming each other for things happening around the manor until they couldn't.

A book being put away when they were done with it or their messes being cleaned up when they came back into a room could be easily explained by how many people lived there. The family entering the dining room, discussing what they were going to order for dinner since Alfred was gone for a week only to find a full meal waiting for them on the diner table? They couldn't brush that off.

None of them could cook.

I absolutely love all of this please write a story and tag me!!!!!!

Batman writing prompt

Tim is a master of faking accents. When at galas, he was able to perfectly mimic the accents of t he other Upper Class Gothamites without a sweat. Bruce (and eventually the rest of the Batfamily) think that Tim drops the fake accent when he’s with them and when he’s out as Red Robin…

Until he accidentally hurts himself in front of them and he has an obvious Crime Alley accent with a hint of Irish.

(Due to spending most his time with Ms. Mac and spending a great deal of time following Batman and Robin into Crime Alley, he ended up developing an accent that mixed the two. Naturally, he learned how to hide it so that his parents didn’t realize and didn’t get angry at Ms. Mac).

Meanwhile Jason: WTF, Tim?