A Happy And Crazy Black Family Au

The words 'yeah yeah yeah' and 'bro' have been forcefully injected into my vocabulary, and I don't even know where from. :|

⚠️MARAUDERS FANS⚠️

we've had the Marauders, we've had the Valkyries, we've had the Slytherin Skittles, now i present...

✨THE PERFUME POSSE✨

(aka the IT blondes of ravenclaw tower + our boy peter)

People: Peter Pettigrew, Gilderoy Lockhart, Rita Skeeter, Emmeline Vance, Xenophilius Lovegood, Pandora Rosier

Lore: Based on the Gilderat ship, the Perfume Posse consists of the IT BLONDES of Ravenclaw tower. Rita Skeeter started a school newspaper for Hogwarts called The Acid Zine: An A-Z on all of Hogwart's gossip. Gilderoy is her top editor and Ravenclaw liaison. He eventually teams up with Peter who, due to his ability to turn into a rat, is excellent at secretly getting gossip from all around the school. Xeno and Pandora are good friends with the others and constantly have to listen to Gilderoy complaining about Peter (they are definitely in love). Emmeline thinks they're all a little silly, but she rooms with Rita and Pandora, so eventually ends up befriending all of them. They are the bitchy gossips who have the entirety of Hogwarts wrapped around their finger because who is gonna mess with the people who could expose your greatest secrets? The Perfume Posse naturally get their name from the Gilderat lore, where Gilderoy becomes well known for smelling amazing. All of the perfume posse have their own signature scent, the brand of which is their closest guarded secret.

Mulciber: What do we hate? Avery and Rosier: The mudbloods! Charity: I am mudblood Avery: No, you were just born into the wrong family, it's not your fault. Charity: But I am... Wilkes: No, little angel, you are the victim of this whole story and we will protect you. Right guys? *Everyone nods* Sinistra: *shakes her head* Group of hypocrites

Everyone but James

for science

If

James=sun

Regulus=water

Lily= flower

is Jegulily= Photosynthesis ?

Bingo

Made a Peter Pettigrew kinnie bingo !! Enjoy !!

what song would you want played at your funeral

I choose you by Alessia Cara

actively going insane as we speak. i wish and crave a physical copy of sssbmty but i have a grand total of 0 book binding skills. everyday i suffer with the fact that i can NEVER own a physical copy in my own two hands. its devastating. i can feel my soul crushing in on itself as it realizes i will never feel the pure bliss of reading sssbmty on smooth paper. i cry and scream and beg the gods to give me the skills and supplies i require to forge my own book, yet wilt and crumble in the cold, empty response they give.

"NO" they shout.

"YOU MUST NEVER EVER BE GIVEN WHAT YOU NEED FOR THIS TASK" they cry out, knowing i will be finally happy if given what i crave.

"PLEASE" i scream into the void, "I WILL WORK WITH THE BARE MINIMUM !! I NEED IT PLEASE !!"

they stare at me, a cold piercing look that travels through my spine as i realize what choice they have already decided, tears well up in my eyes and i collapse onto the rocky ground, all fight leaving me.

"WE HAVE DECIDED TO NEVER EVER LET YOU HAVE WHAT YOU WANT. YOU WILL WASTE YOUR GOLDEN YEARS TRAVELING, LOOKING FOR WHAT YOU DO NOT HAVE. SPEND YOUR LATER YEARS IN DESPAIR AS YOU SLOWLY REALIZE YOU WASTED SO MUCH OF YOUR LIFE FINDING THE UNACHIEVABLE. AND YOU WILL DIE COLD ALONE WITHOUT ANY BOOK TO SHOW FOR WHAT YOU SUFFERED YOUR WHOLE LIFE FOR!!" they shout, their voices echoing in my head as i cry and cry, choking on sobs as the despair slowly sinks in.

their godly presence slowly ease out of my mind. i am left gasping and sobbing in the middle of my bedroom, feeling completely hollow as the utter rejection from the gods sink in, everything i have ever and will ever dream of.....

...

..

.

No.

i wont let this be.

i WILL find a way to get this book in my hands.

i will.

...Babe are you ok??? What the fuck??????

i think itd be kinda cute if readers mom and bruce had to co parent lowk

like the batfam gets sad watching reader get so excited to go with their mom and so sad to come back to the manor lol

-🍰

So real

Readers love their mom's side of the family more than anything—all their aunts and uncles, some of whom aren't even related to their mom, but who really cares? They're not just friends; they're family. These are some of the people who helped raise them and care for them when their mom had to go abroad for modeling. But the best people to hang out with are their cousins, who are like brothers and sisters. They grew up on the same block with these kids, who were younger or older than them, playing Wii or Smash Bros., or just playing hand games and regular tag. These people are their siblings; they made them feel safe and at home; they made them feel special. They made them who they are today. Having a sleepover at their grandma's place, they were all in the living room giggling and laughing under blankets until their grandma came downstairs and told them to shut up, threatening a belt, which made them laugh even more. They might not have another sleepover for a few weeks.

But the reader hates having to go to the manor. You've just never been ignored this much before. Maybe when you were really little, you were too small for the big kids or too big for the babies, and you surely couldn't hang out with the adults, so you just hung off your grandma. But there's no grandma to help you through this; you're all alone in this big mansion filled with kids. You're all alone; they're older than you, smarter than you, stronger, faster—they're just better in every way, and you're just you. Not to mention that they already have ties tighter than a Boy Scout knot, so who are you to intrude on their fun? You never were invited to begin with, and when you were invited, it was out of pity. So you sit there as they talk over you, acting so playful with one another, while you're just there like a small crack in the wall, begging to be filled with something—love, attention, anything, really. So you leave the room to let them have their fun, and now, all of a sudden, you're selfish and rude. "Really, they were begging for us to hang out with them!"They're so spoiled!" They think you can't hear them, but you can. It pushes you to tears, and they're all older than you—not in age, but in the way they act. You're 17, so you act 17, but Tim, who’s the same age as you, acts like he’s 20. They're so mature, and they make you feel so childish. The reader hates, hates, and hates going to Wayne Manor because you're not a Wayne.

Lucius Malfoy is a flamboyant bisexual twink obsessed with his wife, pass it on