Atsumu Was Wrong Maran Won

@kawoala

my attempt at one of my favorite red boys (also a bit of a muscle study)

I love doing magazine esc covers so I figure why not do one for one of the most photogenic... drawgeninc?? people ever

ty for the tag nana!!

I saw this floating around amd wanted to try it!

Go to pinterest and search “my vibe aesthetic” and post the top 6 results!

Tagging: @mimikittysblog @fizzyapplecandy

LAST SEEN WITH:

I COULD BE ENOUGH, ATSUMU MIYA

DESCRIPTION: four years ago, you broke up with atsumu. out of fear or out of hope for his future, you’re not sure. running into him in the grocery store was never planned, but neither was you getting pregnant, right?

ADDITIONAL INFORMATION: teenage pregnancy. pro vball player!atsumu. profanity. a little bit of angst. hidden pregnancy. flower symbolism if you squint. hamilton references (not sorry for this). 21-24 yr old!atsumu. implied marriage.

word count: 1,998. (shoutout to @pmgranate for beta reading).

“atsumu?”

the man in front of you looks nothing like the boy you once knew. taller, broader, more rugged than you ever imagine him to be—but the smile on his face is more familiar than anything else you’ve ever experienced. there’s another man hanging on his shoulder, a wide grin on his face as well. he’s shorter, bright orange hair falling messily against his forehead. he looks vaguely familiar as well, but you can’t think about anything other than the fact that atsumu is standing right in front of you.

“y/n.” his smile falters slightly and he squares his shoulders, seemingly trying to make himself look bigger. “uh, hey. holy shit, yeah, hey. i didn’t know you . . .” he trails off, gaze dropping to the little brunette girl tugging on the hem of your hoodie. “oh, i mean crap. sorry, didn’t see her. are you, uh, babysitting?” he shrugs and you can tell he’s trying to make small talk, trying not to make things awkward.

“mommy, can i get candy?”

his eyes widen, and so do his friends. “mommy?” he repeats quietly, meeting your eyes again. “you-“

your palms start to sweat. you’ve imagined this day thousands of times, practiced what you were going to say, but now, as the moment finally arrives, you’re speechless. with no words to explain yourself, you turn to your daughter, smiling softly. “of course, sweetie. do you want to meet my friend first?”

she looks up at the two men and nods. she’s always been shy when meeting new people—you suppose she got that from you. “hi,” she whispers, waving at them.

“dude, she looks-“

“hi,” atsumu says softly, cutting off his friend. he crouches down to her height and lets out a shaky breath. “i’m atsumu. what’s your name?”

she hums and wraps her arms around one of your legs, trying to hide behind it. “ayu. you’re my mommy’s friend?”

“mhm.” he nods, glancing up at you for a moment. “we met a long time ago, probably just a little bit older than you. how- uh, how old are you?”

she looks up at you and you bite the inside of your cheek. you reach down, lifting her up and settling her on your hip. atsumu stands as you do so. “she’s four,” you say, refusing to meet his eyes. “almost five; next month.”

you see gears turning in his head. he was never good at math, but the moment it clicks for him, his face drops. he opens his mouth to say something, but the words die in his throat. he looks at his friend, who looks confused. your daughter puts her face in your neck and lets out a yawn. you hadn’t even realized it was almost one o’clock—past her nap time.

“listen,” you start, finally looking at him, “my number hasn’t changed. i know what you’re thinking and-“ you sigh. “and, yes, you are. i need to get her down for a nap, but we’ll . . . talk about this. i know it’s a lot to process.”

he blinks at you, his jaw slack. you pick up the basket you had previously sat on the ground and smile, tight-lipped and brief. “goodbye, atsumu.”

[atsumu, 2:01 PM]: Can I come by on Saturday? It’s Atsumu btw You probably knew that

yes. does 12 work for you?

[atsumu, 2:07 PM]: Yeah  See ya then

on saturday, you wake up early and deep clean your house. ayu wakes up when you start vacuuming, and you would feel bad if she didn’t look so adorable with her bed head and puffy cheeks. it reminds you of atsumu—how she sleeps like a rock, drooling and snoring. you put on an outfit that makes it look like you kind of have it together and sit on the couch with ayu until your doorbell rings at 12:17 in the afternoon.

your head whips towards the door, chest rising and falling imperceptibly faster. ayu doesn’t look away from the TV, too engaged in the episode of bluey playing on the screen. you stand, albeit a little wobbly, and walk to the door. before opening it, you take a deep breath and exhale out of your nose.

it’s now or never, right?

“hey,” atsumu says as you open the door, sounding breathless. he’s holding a bouquet of flowers in one hand, his other tucked into the pocket of his beige pants. the hoodie he’s wearing looks familiar and worn—he’s had it since high school, you think. he holds out the flowers to you and smiles sheepishly. “i, uh, got you these. i don't know if that’s . . weird, sorry.”

you take them with a smile. “orchids are my favorite.”

“i know.” his eyes soften and your knees feel weak. it surprises you that he’s still able to make you feel this way even after all these years.

you stand there for another moment, just staring at each other, but a loud noise from the TV snaps you from your daze. “oh, um, yes, come in, please.” you step to the side and he walks in, eyes set on ayu, wrapped in a blanket.

he turns to you as you close the door. “so,” he hesitates, wiping his hands on his pants. he’s just as nervous as you are. “she’s, um, she’s mine? i- i mean i’m her . . . dad?”

your smile falters. you knew you were going to have to talk about it, but you weren’t quite as prepared as you thought you were. you tuck a piece of hair behind your ear and walk across the living room in the kitchen. atsumu follows.

“i got pregnant in the middle of our third year,” you start, reaching up into a cabinet to pull out a vase. you turn to the sink and start filling it with water. “i knew that you were on track to become a professional volleyball player, but i also knew that you . . . that you would have dropped everything to support ayu and i.” you pause, spacing off as the water fills the vase. water dribbles down the side, pricking your fingers, and you sigh, turning the faucet off and turning to him. “volleyball was your passion—is your passion. i didn’t want to prevent you from chasing your dreams. so i broke up with you. i hid my pregnancy under big jackets and, well, i gave birth to ayu just as i started university. it was hard taking care of a bag by myself—uh, my parents . . .” you trail off hoping he gets the point.

he swallows hard, adam's apple bobbing as he does. he nods, gesturing for you to continue. you’re not sure he knows what to say. you wouldn’t.

“i had to drop out to get a job and care for ayu.” your gaze drifts to your daughter, sucking on her thumb. you’ve tried to get her to stop, but nothing seems to work. “i’m not . . .” again, you sigh. “i’m not telling you this because i want anything from you, atsumu.” you look at him and nearly melt. his eyes are glossy with tears; he’s always been emotional. “there was no more hiding it after running into you at the store.”

he looks down at the floor, fingers twitching at his sides. it’s quiet for a long, long moment. finally, he looks back up at you, brows furrowed. “y/n, you should have told me.”

“i know,” you sigh. you place the flowers in the vase and stare at them for a second. “i just- you would have quit volleyball, gotten a job at some minimum wage place. you . . . that’s who you are, atsumu.  you . . . you would have been a good dad, but you’re an amazing volleyball player.”

“i can still be a good dad.” it comes out almost involuntarily, you think, based on the look on atsumu’s face after he says it. “i- i mean.” he swallows and takes a step. “i’d like to, if you’d let me. i already missed four years—nearly five. i don’t want to miss any more.”

your brows furrow, but not in frustration or confusion. the emotion swirling in your stomach is one of indescribable feelings. you sigh quietly and walk around the island to the living room, gently sitting on the edge near ayu.

“hi, sweetie.”

she looks at you and smiles, wide and innocent. “hi, mommy.”

“ayu, do you remember what i told you about your daddy?” you’re so afraid, so scared that this won’t work out. scared that you’ll run away again. scared that atsumu won’t want to do this once he finds out how hard it is.

she thinks for a moment, humming quietly. “that he was- was off on an adventure.” she doesn’t quite say adventure right, but you don’t correct her.

“yes, exactly.” you nod. you glance back at atsumu and nod your head towards the couch. he takes tentative steps and sits down on the other side of ayu. “and you remember my friend from the other day? atsumu?”

she nods, eyeing the blonde hesitantly.

“okay, that’s good. you’re so smart, ayu.” you smile and pinch her cheek lightly. she giggles, swatting at your hand. “atsumu, do you want to . . .”

his eyes widen a fraction and fear flashes across his face. okay, he’s scared too, you think. he turns to ayu and opens his mouth. nothing comes out. he blinks at her, eyes roaming her chubby face. “i’m . . . back from my adventure?”

you can’t stop the giggle that bubbles out. atsumu sends you a panicked look and it only makes you laugh more. “atsu, just be truthful.” the nickname slips out before you even have time to think about it.

he smiles nervously and takes a deep breath. “ayu,” he starts. she looks at him, eyes wide and curious. “i’m your dad.”

there’s a beat of silence before ayu looks at you and juts her bottom lip out, eyes glossing over. “he’s back from his adventure?” she whispers, lip wobbling. when you nod, she looks at atsumu and stares at him. “hi, daddy.”

he barks out a laugh, wet and involuntary. “hi, ayu.”

“daddy, i want the purple one!”

the image before you is picturesque. your daughter, on the hip of your soon to be husband. they don’t seem to care that seven is too old to be carried, and, honestly, neither do you. 

after the day that it all came out, things fell into place quite easily. atsumu was in your life again, dropping by unexpectedly, always with a bouquet of orchids. you started bringing ayu to his games—she always cheered the loudest for him. and somewhere along the way, atsumu became more than just ayu’s dad. late nights on the couch, sharing leftover pasta, reminiscing high school memories. somewhere along the way, late nights became staying the night. sharing pasta became sharing kisses. reminiscing became making new memories.

like this, a weekend at the zoo. you had spent over an hour at the tiger exhibit—ayu’s favorite animal. she rattled off fact after fact and atsumu listened to every single one, even if they were wrong.

“okay, princess, we can get the purple one.” atsumu reaches out and snatches a purple teddy bear off the shelf. he turns to you and winks and you feel your face heat up. “what should we get for mommy, hm? you think she wants a matching teddy bear?”

ayu hums and glances around the store before pointing at another shelf, full of tiger plushies. “we should get her a tiger! she loves tigers.”

you walk up to them, first placing a kiss on ayu’s cheek, then atsumu’s. “i love tigers,” you confirm with a nod. “and i love you.” you reach out and pinch her cheek and she giggles, squirming in atsumu’s arms.

“aw,” atsumu pouts, jutting his lip out dramatically. “what about me, huh? you love me too, right?”

“maybe.” you shrug playfully. he smiles widely and leans forward, pecking your lips quickly. “okay,” you relent, “fine. i love you, i suppose.”

he hums, eyes softening. “good. i love you too.”

this is me and atsumu when we got married:

this is atsumu now:

"Itadori-kun. Good. You're on time."

Kento checked his watch, clearly distracted, as Yuuji approached with pocketed hands. The shopping centre was bustling, a hive of activity around them. Yuuji ruffled his own hair, unsure.

"Yeah, I just...wasn't sure why we're meeting here, is all."

Still distracted, Kento tapped off a message, before slipping his phone back into his inner pocket. He rarely offered smiles when there was business yet to be done, and today was no different.

"I was hoping for your assistance with a few errands before your school term ends. I'm sure you'll be busy with your friends after then, and I shouldn't like to take your vacation time. I'm sure you're looking forward to the break."

In truth, Yuuji deflated just at the thought of it; though he was an orphan amongst orphans, he didn't favour empty time in the way he used to, with memory and the devil as his constant companions. Still he smiled.

"Yeah! Can't wait. Got...got loads planned."

Kento read Yuuji, shrewd for a moment, before hyper-focusing on the task at hand.

"Quite. Come along, Yuuji."

Yuuji grew more and more flummoxed as Kento's list of errands tickered out before them. Too polite to question why, and with absolute faith that Kento had good reason to drag him along for the ride, Yuuji stomached it all with confused good grace.

Yuuji blinked, momentarily blinded by the flash of light in the photo booth. He grinned for the next photo, and Kento's cool deep voice rumbled past the curtain.

"No smiling, Yuuji."

"H-huh? How did you know?"

"Was I wrong?"

"Uh...sorry, Nanamin."

As a strip of tiny poe-faced photos clicked into the dispenser, Yuuji couldn't understand why Nanamin was so satisfied by such bland pictures. Yuuji was, however, touched; clearly Nanamin liked wallet photos as he liked his suits-- beige. Kento clipped across Yuuji's thoughts.

"Do you like the beach, Yuuji?"

Yuuji blinked. "The beach...?"

"Yes. The beach. Do you like it?"

"Uh...I guess. Why?"

Kento hummed, satisfied, not answering Yuuji's question. Instead, as he passed Yuuji his coffee, he stood and leaned around Yuuji, gently pulling at the back of Yuuji's collar. Yuuji twisted to look, baffled now, and Kento released him, sitting with another satisfied hum. He tapped on his phone again.

"Your identification documents are in your room at Jujutsu High?"

"Nanamin...what's this about?"

"It's important to take care of your documents, Yuuji."

"...so you're just...checking up on me?"

Kento smiled, polite. "Of course." A pause. "I assume you'd like to come back to ours for dinner?"

Yuuji brimmed with unasked questions. "I don't need to-- I'm not really that hungry-- honestly a coffee is great--"

"Mrs.Nanami has cooked extra."

"God, yes, please, I'm starving."

+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+

The summer vacation approached Yuuji like a black cloud. He could not bring himself to be excited for enforced inactivity; his casual offers to assist staff on missions fell on deaf ears. Gojo laughed Yuuji off with a clap on the shoulder. Yuuji smiled away the gentle rejection; he did not have the stomach to beg to work.

Instead, Yuuji stewed, leaning on his rainy windowsill until cicada buzz replaced the pitter-patter of water on earth. Late July arrived, unwelcome, and Yuuji steeped in a pit of dread.

At 2am, on the first day of summer vacation, Yuuji's phone rang. Bleary-eyed, and flat, he looked away from his computer screen and lowered his headset. He looked at his screen with a lurching gut; he answered the phone.

"Nanamin?"

A voice, rusty with sleeplessness. "Ah, Yuuji. I apologise for waking you at this hour. I need help with a mission. Are you available?"

Yuuji perked up immediately, tail wagging. "Y-yeah! Yeah, totally! I can be ready...er...in ten? Yeah?"

Kento's voice smiled. "Good. I'll pick you up."

Yuuji danced from his desk chair, shaking off his joggers and wriggling into his uniform with a grin, ruffling his hair before the mirror. In barely two minutes, he was ready, a spring in his step as he headed to wait outside. He felt so light, so relieved, and he grabbed his keys, opening his door to--

"Oh, shi--...Nanamin?"

Kento stood at the door, comfortable in loose clothes, and...sandals? It was an odd contrast to the backdrop of night, and Kento's usual attire. Kento smiled again, polite.

"Yes. Are you ready?"

"Y-yeah, I'm...how did you get here so fast?"

"The roads are quiet at this time of night, Yuuji."

A pause. "...Nanamin."

"Yuuji."

"Are you fucking with me?"

"Language."

When Yuuji opened his mouth to argue back, his jaw dropped, as you bustled up the corridor behind Kento with a sleepy grin on your face. You slapped Kento's elbow, shooting him a chastising look.

"Morning, Yuuji! Excited?" You pressed a kiss to his cheek, whirling past to invade his bedroom. Yuuji was speechless, horribly confused.

Kento checked his watch as you bustled around. Tapped his foot as you bustled around. Tutted, and leaned pointedly round the corner to stare at you as you bustled around.

"Darling, we're going to be la--"

"--don't give me attitude, Kento, we are about 6 hours early, and you know it--"

"--it pays off to check-in ahead of schedule--"

"--hush. I'll have words with you later."

Kento bristled, pugnacious. You walked out of Yuuji's room with his rucksack in hand. You pinched his chin, gesturing him along with your hand.

"Come on, Yuuji. Before Mr.Organised has conniptions."

Yuuji felt himself swept along by Kento, who still scoffed, mulish. The night air smelled sweet, and Yuuji found himself gently bodied into the back seat of Kento's car.

"--Nanamin-- I don't understand--"

You shot Kento a pointed look from the passenger seat. At first frowning, then with dawning realisation, you scolded Kento in disbelief.

"...you haven't told him."

Kento almost smirked as he rolled the car away over gravel. "I don't know what you mean."

You looked from Kento, to Yuuji, and back again. You reached slowly into Kento's bag, rummaging. Yuuji felt a glossy little book pressed into his hands.

"...a...passport?"

"...Kento didn't tell you."

Never one for expecting a gift, Yuuji couldn't see one when placed before his eyes. "Tell me what? Nanamin?"

Kento chuckled to himself, his eyes glimmering at Yuuji in the rearview mirror.

"Our flight is at 10:30, Yuuji."

Yuuji peered into the seat beside him; a new suitcase, neatly labelled with a luggage tag in his name. He yanked it to the seat beside him, unzipping it, and finding it full of new swimsuits, t-shirts, shorts, sandals, everything he could possibly need. He opened the glossy new passport in his hands, and hiccupped, his breath catching in his chest.

Yuuji rammed into realisation with prickling eyes, and a quiet sniffle, his eyes hidden in the dark. His reply was thick, stilted.

"Our flight...to where?"

"Malaysia. Now give me back that passport. You'll only lose it."

IRIS.

spam/interactions for @pomeloblush

behind every writer who rarely posts is a writer who used to post daily

words to use when writing

Appetite:

craving, demand, gluttony, greed, hunger, inclination, insatiable, longing, lust, passion, ravenousness, relish, taste, thirst, urge, voracity, weakness, willingness, yearning, ardor, dedication, desire, devotion, enthusiasm, excitement, fervor, horny, intensity, keenness, wholeheartedness, zeal

Arouse:

agitate, awaken, electrify, enliven, excite, entice, foment, goad, incite, inflame, instigate, kindle, provoke, rally, rouse, spark, stimulate, stir, thrill, waken, warm, whet, attract, charm, coax, fire up, fuel, heat up, lure, produce, stir up, tantalize, tease, tempt, thrum, torment, wind up, work up

Assault:

attack, advancing, aggressive, assailing, charging, incursion, inundated, invasion, offensive, onset, onslaught, overwhelmed, ruinous, tempestuous, strike, violation, ambush, assail, barrage, bombard, bombardment, crackdown, wound

Beautiful: 

admirable, alluring, angelic, appealing, bewitching, charming, dazzling, delicate, delightful, divine, elegant, enticing, exquisite, fascinating, gorgeous, graceful, grand, magnificent, marvelous, pleasing, radiant, ravishing, resplendent, splendid, stunning, sublime, attractive, beguiling, captivating, enchanting, engaging, enthralling, eye-catching, fetching, fine, fine-looking, good-looking, handsome, inviting, lovely, mesmeric, mesmerizing, pretty, rakish, refined, striking, tantalizing, tempting

Brutal:

atrocious, barbarous, bloodthirsty, callous, cruel, feral, ferocious, hard, harsh, heartless, inhuman, merciless, murderous, pitiless, remorseless, rough, rude, ruthless, savage, severe, terrible, unmerciful, vicious, bestial, brute, brutish, cold-blooded, fierce, gory, nasty, rancorous, sadistic, uncompromising, unfeeling, unforgiving, unpitying, violent, wild

Burly:

able-bodied, athletic, beefy, big, brawny, broad-shouldered, bulky, dense, enormous, great, hard, hardy, hearty, heavily built, heavy, hefty, huge, husky, immense, large, massive, muscular, mighty, outsized, oversized, powerful, powerfully built, prodigious, robust, solid, stalwart, stocky, stout, strapping, strong, strongly built, sturdy, thick, thickset, tough, well-built, well-developed

Carnal:

animalistic, bodily, impure, lascivious, lecherous, lewd, libidinous, licentious, lustful, physical, prurient, salacious, sensuous, voluptuous, vulgar, wanton, , coarse, crude, dirty, raunchy, rough, unclean

Dangerous:

alarming, critical, fatal, formidable, impending, malignant, menacing, mortal, nasty, perilous, precarious, pressing, serious, terrible, threatening, treacherous, urgent, vulnerable, wicked, acute, damaging, deadly, death-defying, deathly, destructive, detrimental, explosive, grave, harmful, hazardous, injurious, lethal, life-threatening, noxious, poisonous, risky, severe, terrifying, toxic, unsafe, unstable, venomous

Dark:

atrocious, corrupt, forbidding, foul, infernal, midnight, morbid, ominous, sinful, sinister, somber, threatening, twilight, vile, wicked, abject, alarming, appalling, baleful, bizarre, bleak, bloodcurdling, boding evil, chilling, cold, condemned, creepy, damned, daunting, demented, desolate, dire, dismal, disturbing, doomed, dour, dread, dreary, dusk, eerie, fear, fearsome, frightening, ghastly, ghostly, ghoulish, gloom, gloomy, grave, grim, grisly, gruesome, hair-raising, haunted, hideous, hopeless, horrendous, horrible, horrid, horrific, horrifying, horror, ill-fated, ill-omened, ill-starred, inauspicious, inhospitable, looming, lost, macabre, malice, malignant, menacing, murky, mysterious, night, panic, pessimistic, petrifying, scary, shadows, shadowy, shade, shady, shocking, soul-destroying, sour, spine-chilling, spine-tingling, strange, terrifying, uncanny, unearthly, unlucky, unnatural, unnerving, weird, wretched

Delicious:

enticing, exquisite, luscious, lush, rich, savory, sweet, tasty, tempting, appetizing, delectable, flavorsome, full of flavor, juicy, lip-smacking, mouth-watering, piquant, relish, ripe, salty, spicy, scrummy, scrumptious, succulent, tangy, tart, tasty, yummy, zesty

Ecstasy:

delectation, delirium, elation, euphoria, fervor, frenzy, joy, rapture, transport, bliss, excitement, happiness, heaven, high, paradise, rhapsody, thrill, blissful, delighted, elated, extremely happy, in raptures (of delight), in seventh heaven, jubilant, on cloud nine, overexcited, overjoyed, rapturous, thrilled

Ecstatic:

delirious, enraptured, euphoric, fervent, frenzied, joyous, transported, wild

Erotic:

amatory, amorous, aphrodisiac, carnal, earthy, erogenous, fervid, filthy, hot, impassioned, lascivious, lecherous, lewd, raw, romantic, rousing, salacious, seductive, sensual, sexual, spicy, steamy, stimulating, suggestive, titillating, voluptuous, tantalizing

Gasp:

catch of breath, choke, gulp, heave, inhale, pant, puff, snort, wheeze, huff, rasp, sharp intake of air, short of breath, struggle for breath, swallow, winded 

Heated:

ardent, avid, excited, fervent, fervid, fierce, fiery, frenzied, furious, impassioned, intense, passionate, raging, scalding, scorched, stormy, tempestuous, vehement, violent, ablaze, aflame, all-consuming, blazing, blistering, burning, crazed, explosive, febrile, feverish, fired up, flaming, flushed, frantic, hot, hot-blooded, impatient, incensed, maddening, obsessed, possessed, randy, searing, sizzling, smoldering, sweltering, torrid, turbulent, volatile, worked up, zealous

Hunger:

appetite, ache, craving, gluttony, greed, longing, lust, mania, mouth-watering, ravenous, voracious, want, yearning, thirst

Hungry:

avid, carnivorous, covetous, craving, eager, greedy, hungered, rapacious, ravenous, starved, unsatisfied, voracious, avaricious, desirous, famished, grasping, insatiable, keen, longing, predatory, ravening, starving, thirsty, wanting

Intense:

forceful, severe, passionate, acute, agonizing, ardent, anxious, biting, bitter, burning, close, consuming, cutting, deep, eager, earnest, excessive, exquisite, extreme, fervent, fervid, fierce, forcible, great, harsh, impassioned, keen, marked, piercing, powerful, profound, severe, sharp, strong, vehement, violent, vivid, vigorous

Liquid:

damp, cream, creamy, dripping, ichorous, juicy, moist, luscious, melted, moist, pulpy, sappy, soaking, solvent, sopping, succulent, viscous, wet / aqueous, broth, elixir, extract, flux, juice, liquor, nectar, sap, sauce, secretion, solution, vitae, awash, moisture, boggy, dewy, drenched, drip, drop, droplet, drowning, flood, flooded, flowing, fountain, jewel, leaky, milky, overflowing, saturated, slick, slippery, soaked, sodden, soggy, stream, swamp, tear, teardrop, torrent, waterlogged, watery, weeping

Lithe:

agile, lean, pliant, slight, spare, sinewy, slender, supple, deft, fit, flexible, lanky, leggy, limber, lissom, lissome, nimble, sinuous, skinny, sleek, slender, slim, svelte, trim, thin, willowy, wiry

Moan:

beef, cry, gripe, grouse, grumble, lament, lamentation, plaint, sob, wail, whine, bemoan, bewail, carp, deplore, grieve, gripe, grouse, grumble, keen, lament, sigh, sob, wail, whine, mewl

Moving:

(exciting,) affecting, effective  arousing, awakening, breathless, dynamic, eloquent, emotional, emotive, expressive, fecund, far-out, felt in gut, grabbed by, gripping, heartbreaking, heartrending, impelling, impressive, inspirational, meaningful, mind-bending, mind-blowing, motivating, persuasive, poignant, propelling, provoking, quickening, rallying, rousing, significant, stimulating, simulative, stirring, stunning, touching, awe-inspiring, energizing, exhilarating, fascinating, heart pounding, heart stopping, inspiring, riveting, thrilling

Need:

compulsion, demand, desperate, devoir, extremity, impatient longing, must, urge, urgency / desire, appetite, avid, burn, craving, eagerness, fascination, greed, hunger, insatiable, longing, lust, taste, thirst, voracious, want, yearning, ache, addiction, aspiration, desire, fever, fixation, hankering, hope, impulse, inclination, infatuation, itch, obsession, passion, pining, wish, yen

Pain: 

ache, afflict, affliction, agony, agonize, anguish, bite, burn, chafe, distress, fever, grief, hurt, inflame, laceration, misery, pang, punish, sting, suffering, tenderness, throb, throe, torment, torture, smart

Painful:

aching, agonizing, arduous, awful, biting, burning, caustic, dire, distressing, dreadful, excruciating, extreme, grievous, inflamed, piercing, raw, sensitive, severe, sharp, tender, terrible, throbbing, tormenting, angry, bleeding, bloody, bruised, cutting, hurting, injured, irritated, prickly, skinned, smarting, sore, stinging, unbearable, uncomfortable, upsetting, wounded

Perverted: 

aberrant, abnormal, corrupt, debased, debauched, defiling, depraved, deviant, monstrous, tainted, twisted, vicious, warped, wicked, abhorrent, base, decadent, degenerate, degrading, dirty, disgusting, dissipated, dissolute, distasteful, hedonistic, immodest, immoral, indecent, indulgent, licentious, nasty, profligate, repellent, repugnant, repulsive, revolting, shameful, shameless, sickening, sinful, smutty, sordid, unscrupulous, vile 

Pleasurable:

charming, gratifying, luscious, satisfying, savory, agreeable, delicious, delightful, enjoyable, nice, pleasant, pleasing, soothing, succulent

Pleasure:

bliss, delight, gluttony, gratification, relish, satisfaction, thrill, adventure, amusement, buzz, contentment, delight, desire, ecstasy, enjoyment, excitement, fun, happiness, harmony, heaven, joy, kick, liking, paradise, seventh heaven 

Rapacious:

avaricious, ferocious, furious, greedy, predatory, ravening, ravenous, savage, voracious, aggressive, gluttonous, grasping, insatiable, marauding, plundering

Rapture:

bliss, ecstasy, elation, exaltation, glory, gratification, passion, pleasure, floating, unbridled joy

Rigid:

adamant, austere, definite, determined, exact, firm, hard, rigorous, solid, stern, uncompromising, unrelenting, unyielding, concrete, fixed, harsh, immovable, inflexible, obstinate, resolute, resolved, severe, steadfast, steady, stiff, strong, strict, stubborn, taut, tense, tight, tough, unbending, unchangeable, unwavering

Sudden:

abrupt, accelerated, acute, fast, flashing, fleeting, hasty, headlong, hurried, immediate, impetuous, impulsive, quick, quickening, rapid, rash, rushing, swift, brash, brisk, brusque, instant, instantaneous, out of the blue, reckless, rushed, sharp, spontaneous, urgent, without warning

Thrust:

(forward) advance, drive, forge, impetus, impulsion, lunge, momentum, onslaught, poke, pressure, prod, propulsion, punch, push, shove, power, proceed, progress, propel

(push hard) assail, assault, attack, bear down, buck, drive, force, heave, impale, impel, jab, lunge, plunge, press, pound, prod, ram, shove, stab, transfix, urge, bang, burrow, cram, gouge, jam, pierce, punch, slam, spear, spike, stick

Thunder-struck:

amazed, astonished, aghast, astounded, awestruck, confounded, dazed, dazed, dismayed, overwhelmed, shocked, staggered, startled, stunned, gob-smacked, bewildered, dumbfounded, flabbergasted, horrified, incredulous, surprised, taken aback 

Torment:

agony, anguish, hurt, misery, pain, punishment, suffering, afflict, angst, conflict, distress, grief, heartache, misfortune, nightmare, persecute, plague, sorrow, strife, tease, test, trial, tribulation, torture, turmoil, vex, woe

Touch:

(physical) - blow, brush, caress, collide, come together, contact, converge, crash, cuddle, embrace, feel, feel up, finger, fondle, frisk, glance, glide, graze, grope, handle, hit, hug, impact, join, junction, kiss, lick, line, manipulate, march, massage, meet, nudge, palm, partake, pat, paw, peck, pet, pinch, probe, push, reach, rub, scratch, skim, slide, smooth, strike, stroke, suck, sweep, tag, tap, taste, thumb, tickle, tip, touching, toy, bite, bump, burrow, buss, bury, circle, claw, clean, clutch, cover, creep, crush, cup, curl, delve, dig, drag, draw, ease, edge, fiddle with, flick, flit, fumble, grind, grip, grub, hold, huddle, knead, lap, lave, lay a hand on, maneuver, manhandle, mash, mold, muzzle, neck, nestle, nibble, nip, nuzzle, outline, play, polish, press, pull, rasp, ravish, ream, rim, run, scoop, scrabble, scrape, scrub, shave, shift, shunt, skate, slip, slither, smack, snake, snuggle, soothe, spank, splay, spread, squeeze, stretch, swipe, tangle, tease, thump, tongue, trace, trail, tunnel twiddle, twirl, twist, tug, work, wrap 

(mental) - communicate, examine, inspect, perception, scrutinize

Wet:

bathe, bleed, burst, cascade, course, cover, cream, damp, dampen, deluge, dip, douse, drench, dribble, drip, drizzle, drool, drop, drown, dunk, erupt, flood, flow, gush, immerse, issue, jet, leach, leak, moisten, ooze, overflow, permeate, plunge, pour, rain, rinse, run, salivate, saturate, secrete, seep, shower, shoot, slaver, slobber, slop, slosh, sluice, spill, soak, souse, spew, spit, splash, splatter, spout, spray, sprinkle, spurt, squirt, steep, stream, submerge, surge, swab, swamp, swill, swim, trickle, wash, water

Wicked:

abominable, amoral, atrocious, awful, base, barbarous, dangerous, debased, depraved, distressing, dreadful, evil, fearful, fiendish, fierce, foul, heartless, hazardous, heinous, immoral, indecent, intense, mean, nasty, naughty, nefarious, offensive, profane, scandalous, severe, shameful, shameless, sinful, terrible, unholy, vicious, vile, villainous, wayward, bad, criminal, cruel, deplorable, despicable, devious, ill-intentioned, impious, impish, iniquitous, irreverent, loathsome, Machiavellian, mad, malevolent, malicious, merciless, mischievous, monstrous, perverse, ruthless, spiteful, uncaring, unkind, unscrupulous, vindictive, virulent, wretched

Writhe: 

agonize, bend, jerk, recoil, lurch, plunge, slither, squirm, struggle, suffer, thrash, thresh, twist, wiggle, wriggle, angle, arc, bow, buck, coil, contort, convulse, curl, curve, fidget, fight, flex, go into spasm, grind, heave, jiggle, jolt, kick, rear, reel, ripple, resist, roll, lash, lash out, screw up, shake, shift, slide, spasm, stir, strain, stretch, surge, swell, swivel, thrust, turn violently, tussle, twitch, undulate, warp, worm, wrench, wrestle, yank 

like and i’ll be in ur asks when i wake up