I Am 100 Percent Wearing Something Like The Lucifer Outfit Next Time I Have Casual Day At The Office

I cannot have children because I envisage the following conversation between myself and their teacher:

Teacher: Little Zeke called Little Polly a “goatfucking twatface” today, do you know where they learned that?

Me: Well, was the bitch playing like a goatfucking twatface? I don’t know what your fucking problem is.

if my son is stealing pies off windowsills its because i taught him to do that bitch 

If you know, you know.

They didn’t specify positive qualities lol, time to use self deprecating humor that makes everyone uncomfortable!

Someone: "What are your qualities?"

Me: o_O

Me: "Y'all have these?"

Lucifer is Jumin Han, but with the superior pet species, and that’s why I love him.

Who doesn’t love a guy who loves dogs? Lucifer with a puppy Cerberus anyone? Yes? Yes.

Look I'm not saying Ayme Miura is now my favorite person in world all I'm saying is that he is so. damn. close

My husband is mortified that I wear my dressing gown to take the dogs to poop in the mornings. I have only this to say: if you see my butt when I’m scooping poop, you. are. welcome.

Had to go out and save my cat (from another cat) at 5am this morning wearing my dressing gown, and my neighbour may or may not have seen my butt.

How was your morning?

Anybody who lives in the Southern US probably has seen those Chick Tracts, the comics you find left in gas station bathrooms and liquor stores that tell you how Dungeons and Dragons/Catholics/Muslims/THE GAYS are secretly demonic forces that want to send you to hell forever.

I would pay an unholy amount of money for Jack Chick to return to life, learn that there are people playing a game about dating Lucifer himself, draw a cartoon pamphlet about how evil this all is, and die again of a rage-induced brain bleed.

Then I would use it to make a paper-mache statue of Asmo touching himself.

Or, like, some paper roses, whatever.

So I saw a video on YouTube recently where it was a DIY paper rose. I think it was 5 min crafts but don't quote me on that (I didn't click the video).

But BUT

It got me thinking about an MC who's mad at one of the OM brothers. But of course they still love said brother. Which leads to this:

MC: I made you a paper rose

Brother: Oh, thank y-

MC: It's made out of Bible Paper

Or, alternatively:

MC: It's made out of a pamphlet I got from a church telling me how to rid myself of demons

I need a new tarot set and if you don’t make a whole set and sell it to me I swear to Diavolo---

OBEY ME! - TAROT CARD SERIES

(XX) Barbatos— "Judgement"

"Referred to as a time of resurrection and awakening, a time when a period of our life comes to an absolute end making way for dynamic new beginnings."

Upright: Decision Making, Awakening, Inner Calling, Absolution, Redemption

Reversed: Poor Logic, Poor or hasty Judgement, Self-doubt, Stagnation

Finally got around to drawing the second card. Please click on it for better quality!

Why was I a French major and not a Japanese major?

I AM CRYING

"Introducing the eldest brother Lucifer"

By Official Obey Me! (Illustrated by @/Knmc21da)

Translated version by @/SOLOM0AN on Twitter

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It looks like they'll be doing these manga page panels for the Japanese release! How fun! :3

Sometimes when I had a student intern, I’d bring them to court and let them sit at the counsel table with me to help me run exhibits/give me documents and such. I would often lean over and ask things like, “so, what question would you ask next?” or “is that question objectionable?” as a learning exercise.

But I’m glad I never had a private client, because looking at it from the outside, it 100 percent would have looked like I was pulling a Phoenix Wright.