This...this Is So Beautiful I Almost Cried

An awful end to a beautiful morning...

If possible... I feel like I somehow look like this statue...very cracked and broken

But it can’t be seen

And I wish people noticed...

It’s so upsetting to see how many people live the same heartbreaking reality. No child (no matter how old they are) should feel the burden of their parents negativity. No child should feel anger and pain because of their parents. It doesn’t have to be physical to effect you. I hope everyone finds healing and love no matter how hard it seems to be.

Man of the House

Some fathers are born miserable

I think

Or at least mine was

He had a rough childhood

He hardened his heart

Threw out his feelings- left unused

He stares at the world with dead eyes

Soon, he's gifted with children

You'd think kids would change him

But he remains a miserable man to this day

Dragging us through the muck of his pain

Allowing us to swallow his discomfort and agony

Instead of teaching us things

Like love and regulating feelings-the good, the bad, and the downright ugly

We learned how to be filled with rage and emptiness

How to yell until our voice bounces off the walls

Our faces red from our generational anger

We can't help but tether his suffering

To our bones

But as an "adult"

In her Wretched Twenties

Who sees him with fresh eyes

I will not be the keeper of my fathers' pain

Who’s like waiting for someone to save them?? Just me? Ok

I want to be one of those frogs from Over the Garden Wall that tosses their fancy clothes and hibernates under the mud but instead I’m a dumb human with responsibilities and back pain

There’s some days where I just want to disappear.

Like me and a bag with food, clothes, a notebook, a sketchpad, my art supplies, books and a camera and walk away for a few weeks at least.

And take a breather from my life

“…who have to translate each thought into words…”

If that isn’t me in a nutshell

if we could read minds I still don't think we'd understand them.

So lonely

Just because the days are repetitive at the moment, it does not mean you are not still making progress. You are not wasting your life. You still have time.

Please....

So you’ll take me on museum dates and write me letters every weekend ?

Always